Going on 2 weeks with no contact from my WW. She has tried to call and I didn’t answer and she left no messages. Young son who was home for spring break from college wouldn’t take her calls either when she called during the day. After I found her email to the OM stating how much she loves him, I just couldn’t allow her in my home or life anymore. I know intellectually that I am doing the only thing I can do but I wonder how she is doing. Is she making it ok? I suppose OM will help her if she needs help. My heart has been broken by what she has done to us and our family. I haven’t tried to contact her and I won’t . One cannot live with someone for 29 years and not have feelings for them. So I wonder.

{{{hugs}}}
Hang in there. Stay dark!!!!! She's in a major fog right now.
You will make it through....just take care of and protect yourself and kids from this craziness!

Hopeful - I think you are doing the right thing. It is normal to wonder how she is doing, but she needs to know that her behavior is unacceptable. She cannot have both you and the OM.

Hang in there. It's not easy, but is the best way to protect yourself. Her "love" for the OM is just a fantasy. Let her experience a little of the reality of her choices.

Great job, HINC! It sounds like you are finally going through a normal detachment from her. Hang in there, because you will start to feel a peace of mind you haven't felt in years. After this initial period, folks report that they don't think about the WS as much and they just start feeling better and better.

But, ya have to walk through the swamp to get out of the swamp first. You are still walking out of the swamp. So, hang in there, HINC, you are doing great!

{{{hugs}}}
Hang in there. Stay dark!!!!! She's in a major fog right now.
You will make it through....just take care of and protect yourself and kids from this craziness!

Hi hinc,

Stay strong now.It will get better.I can understand how difficult it must be going without contact with your WW.I was with my WH for 20 years and although it was hard at first,it just became more clear that the H I used to know no longer existed and the WH that was there now was not someone I wanted to know anymore.

Hopefully your WW will see this loss of you and take stock.You are doing the right thing.

Prayers to you and the kids~

O

HINC,

Ok, now that we have the inconsequential stuff out of the way, such as your marriage and your W, let's get down to business. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

Who you pickin my man? Are you still a Duke fan? Although my sister graduated from there I have my doubts. I would however love to see Duke play Texas Tech. I am a Bobby Knight fan and Coach K was his student. I would imagine that would be a very intense game as would be Kansas and NC.

So what are you thinking in these important matters. I know basketball in your part of the country is like football in Texas and south. It is not "life and death" it is far more important than that. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

By the way, you are doing the correct thing. You may not realize this but in plan B you are also going through withdrawal from your W. Your feelings are normal after all of this time. I do hope that eventually she will face her issues with OM and end it. I am betting OM will NOT divorce his W. If she does face her issues, then maybe for the first time in 6 or more years you might have a chance to have a real marriage and a marriage that rewards you both with happiness.

Hang in there HINC.

God Bless,

JL

HINC,

Ok, now that we have the inconsequential stuff out of the way, such as your marriage and your W, let's get down to business. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

Who you pickin my man? Are you still a Duke fan? Although my sister graduated from there I have my doubts. I would however love to see Duke play Texas Tech. I am a Bobby Knight fan and Coach K was his student. I would imagine that would be a very intense game as would be Kansas and NC.

So what are you thinking in these important matters. I know basketball in your part of the country is like football in Texas and south. It is not "life and death" it is far more important than that. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

By the way, you are doing the correct thing. You may not realize this but in plan B you are also going through withdrawal from your W. Your feelings are normal after all of this time. I do hope that eventually she will face her issues with OM and end it. I am betting OM will NOT divorce his W. If she does face her issues, then maybe for the first time in 6 or more years you might have a chance to have a real marriage and a marriage that rewards you both with happiness.

Hang in there HINC.

God Bless,

JL

Just Learning-please post again. For whatever reason I can't get your message. It does not show up when I scroll to the bottom of this topic. I am very interested in what you have to say.
Thanks to everyone who posted to me, I need all the support I can get.

After my last post JL's message came up. I think UNC has a chance as well as the fighting Illini. Then it's anybody's guess. I don't think the Blue Devils will in Saint Louis due to lack of depth on the bench but Coach K's team won't ever give up so they could be there. I'm pulling for them but I am trying to see things as they are not how I want them to be even with my WW.

HINC,

You are right about the depth, and Illinois is a very good team. I have to admit to enjoying the upsets, such as Gonzaga making deep into the tournament.

I do think you are correct in your approach of seeing things for what they are. I do hope that eventually your W will see what she has done, and decide that she wants to be your W again. I suspect you would enjoy this new woman, as she would enjoy the new you. It is really is in her court isn't it?

Only time will tell.

Look forward to hearing from you again.

JL

My H's favorite team is the fighting Illini. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

I'm tempted to pick the Illini to win it all but only 3 teams in the last 22 years have finished number 1 and went on to win the tournament. I think they will be there at the end but won't win it. Maybe Kentucky or Syracuse(a dark horse).
MelodyLane thanks for posting to me, you words mean a lot to me.