[color:"purple"] [/color] H and I are talking again. Nothing great but at least we are talking. He truly loves OC (even though no paternity has been established) and OW is using this to her advantage. H is afraid she will keep OC from him and there is nothing he can do leagally. Her H is paying CS. How does one deal with this?

[color:"red"] He needs to get an attorney if he doesn't have one already. He will obviously need to try for a DNA test. Depending on the state you're in, it will be difficult for him to interject himself if OW and her H were M at conception and if her H is being father to the child, (attorney is really needed if your H chooses this path).

Is her H on the birth certificate? Does he even know he might not be the bio? If he does know, and is willing to raise the child as his own, is your H willing to step aside? [/color]

H's name is on the BS, however she is still legally married to her husband therefore he is paying CS. Her H already has someone else in his life. H doesn't want a DNA test. In his mind OC is his. OW most definitely uses this to her advantage.

Your H cannot control what OW does or doesn't do. He can however make intelligent choices on how HE should proceed.

I still say he needs an attorney. It sounds too messy not to have one--he's on the BC, but her H is supporting the child???? (huh?)

Do you know what the laws are in your state, in terms of what the implications are of your H being on the BC?

IMO, it's plain reckless not to get a DNA test, especially if as you say OW is using his non-challenge to her advantage, (whatever that means).

Last thing he should do is sit on this. Two years down the road he could find out the child isn't his but is responsible for the child nonetheless, because he never challenged it.

I just see someone getting screwed in this whole thing. Either your H, her H or maybe both. Who knows if there's a 3rd guy?

Your H needs to be smart and prudent.