After reading seeking?'s post about reconnecting with his HS girlfriend for an affair, I was wondering how many others have had the same thing happen?

My H began his affair with his "first love" after attending their HS reunion. I was supposed to attend, but had to drive our boys to Scout camp and had to miss it. OW moved her room to be next to his, told him she was single and was the aggressor(at first). While those things are true, my H was available for the affair. A big part of the appeal and zing was the feeling of recapturing his youth and how it felt when he was in HS and "in-love".

I have read a number of articles about how Classmates.com and other websites have fueled a wave a reunions with past sweethearts. There are books and articles talking about how wonderful it can be and how powerful the pull of a "first love" can be. The do put in a SMALL paragraph about the damage it can cause if the people still have spouses. But that is definately not the focus of their topic...........only an unfortunate by product.

So.....I was wondering, how many of your spouses had affairs with HS/College sweethearts that they saw at reunions or contacted through websites? What happened?

Well my H's first A with a g/f from HS and his second A was with his former g/f before me. Both times the woman contacted him after a number of years and the pull of youthful love was powerful for my H. I absolutely HATE reunion.com and classmates.com because I know the damage they can bring.

IMHO, the whole affair thing is like being a teenager. The hormones, the newness, the forbidden, the immaturity. We, the BS are left to be the adults.

When I first found out about A, my H began giving me articles about how powerful first loves are and how the feelings are buried deep in their souls! Blah, blah, blah. He and OW felt they should carry these around to "explain" to others how they felt and why it was bigger than they could control (read: not their fault). There is a women (can't remember her name) who conducts some type of "research" on the topic and she writes and speaks on this topic.

We all know this is baloney and only provides an excuse for people to engage in behavior they KNOW is wrong, selfish and cruel.

FF: I can't believe you H would dig up TWO old girlfriends! I am so sorry! You really must hate classmates.com.

Grape: I totally agree! The BS has to be more mature and accept many things if we want to preserve our M.

My WW had her affair with her high school sweetheart. They embarked on a 5 year affair right under my nose. At present, we are separated after being married 29 years. And I believe the affair is still on going. She moved out to another town about 500 miles from here but it is not OM's town. I'm in Plan B and haven't seen or talked to her in over a month. At least I am out of the chaos.

Hi,

My W had her second A with her first boyfriend. They were not HSSH but they met when she was 15 and he was 18. When I found out about her A I also found out that she saw him a couple of months b4 we got married. She says that nothing happened then but why should I think otherwise. I know that she will always have feelings for him. She proved it when she had her A. I'm affraid that she will never feel for me the way she did for him, since she would do and did everything for him, she accepted her abbusive behavior, his repeated cheating, etc and still she went back to him. I feel for her what she felt for him ...