Hi all beloved MB'ers,

Me and WW are seperated now. I'm doing a plan B now until she finally decides to divorce, or until my love for her dies (whichever comes first).

Something occurred to me. Apart from her selfish actions, hurtful behaviour, the lies, the betrayal, breaking promises, not being thruthful to marriage vow thus not being truthful to God, the cheating etc etc. Those are really BAD things a person can do. Apart from those things, I really cannot find anything in her character that would make me want to leave her. Makes it so hard for me to "let go" of her...

Man, I just want my old, loving W back so much. But I hate WW... She's just plain evil.

I don't know what I'm trying to explain here. Couple of days ago I felt like I could move on without her, but now I miss her sooooo much. I keep praying she comes back, people call me crazy... Maybe I am...but they don't know what a great, caring, loving, wonderful woman W was before she became evil WW...
Guess I still love her very deeply...

Actually, this is my first post in a long while. How time flies, even when it's time spent in agony... Hope everyone is having at least 1 smile a day.

Bless you all

DB

I can appeciate your dilema. As a WS I can say that I have changed because of the A but I would have changed because time "marches on". I am not the "same person" I was five years ago. I would like to think that I am "better" than the "old me" but I think if you could poll my friends, family and W they would say I am "the same guy" just grayer.

I have worked at being more sensitive towards my W and family and I have tried to be more open with my feelings especially with my W.

My W and I never seperated but there were sometimes we were apart for a few days. Hearing her voice,my w, on the phone was a welcome sound to me;seeing her was a welcome sight.

You are not "crazy" for wanting her back but if she does return you will have to build a new relationship with her. Out of that new relationship you can have trust, hope and love again.

I think decididng to have an A is not easy and it is an especially difficult decision for a woman. Something was missing in her life that she somehow thought the new relationship would fix and it did for a short time. She has to be sure that if she returns she can fill that emptiness that exsists in her heart.

She has a big job and the task may seem daunting to her. Hopefully she will see that she needs "repair" rather than just moving on and "sweeping it under the carpet".
H