The other thread about dumb, senseless, unrelated-to-reality things WSs say while in the fog is now "read only," so to make myself feel better I'm starting a new one. Please add your examples - I'm kind of new here and would love to hear them.

My WH, who has left and is still involved with OW, has said these intelligent statements, all worthy of MENSA:

When talking about financial support, WH said: "I can't believe you don't trust me! I would never hurt you and the kids!"

When I found out OW's name through cell phone records, WH said: "She has nothing to do with any of this. Can't you just leave her out of it?"

When asked about OW's marital status the first time, WH said she had been divorced for "a few years." The next time I asked, he said she "was divorced almost a year." The next time, he said she was in the "process of getting a divorce." Funny, OWH didn't seem to be aware of the divorce proceedings when I called him.

To explain why he had much of our mail diverted to a P.O. Box weeks before he left, WH said he did it to help me, so I wouldn't have to worry about bills, etc. How kind of him.

To our kids: "I found a woman I love more than your mother and I'll probably marry her, but nothing will change for you. You'll get used to it."

When the MC asked him his age, WH said he was 43. Ummm, he just turned 42.

My favorite: When asked if he was living with OW, WH said, "How could you ask that? We won't move in together until our divorces are final. She does have morals!" Uh huh, that's why she's cheating on her husband and having an A with a married man.

Please, share your alien-speak. It will make me feel better. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/crazy.gif" alt="" />

...morals...LMAO!!!

I also heard "this has nothing to do with her, leave her out of it!"

"She is not a bad person"... yep, that's why she cheated on her other MM w. you to make him jealous when the "I'm-pregnant-oops-I-lost-the-baby trick did not work!!!

the worst: "I am in love with her" said about the skankiest OW I have ever met, a true Jerry Springer knock-off... and after just a few weeks... GRRRR!!!

<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/tongue.gif" alt="" /> This goes along with: "If you really loved me, you'd want me to be happy. I'm happy with her."

I also got: "I couldn't help it. God led me to her." Yep, God is all about adultery. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/mad.gif" alt="" />

WW: I don't know if I can trust you anymore. Your acting so differently. - DUH!

WW: Are you OK (After spending two days filling out my half of divorce paperwork)

WW: Discussing pending divorce: You know we can still date afterward. It might even be better! I just can't be married.

WW: I don't think we need to tell anyone we're getting divorced.... ????????

SIS

I don't have much.

My W and I haven't talked much, but the only nice thing she's ever said about OM to me is "I think I'm in love with him."

Probably the dumbest thing she's said to me about him is, "I need to know if I can trust him."

The only thing as funny is imagining that he thinks he can trust her.

There was a time she'd have turned herself inside out for me, and I couldn't trust her. What makes OM think he can?

GC

Thanks, everyone. Please keep them coming. It makes me feel better to think WH is following the standard alien script. I'm still so new at this that it all seems unreal to me.

I thought of another one: I asked WH how he would have felt if I had been the one to do what he has done. He replied, "It would kill me...but you'd never do something like this, you're a good person." Hmmm...what does that say about you and MOW, WH?

Oooh, one more: "It's not that bad. She usually goes home by 11 p.m." Yes, you're right, WH, it's only adultery if it happens after 11 p.m. (insert rolling eyes smilie here).

Yes, I'm sure no one will notice. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smirk.gif" alt="" />

My husband told me that he and OW had sooooooooo much in common.
OW favorite drinks are: Cold milk and she also loves Redwine.

OW also dislikes cats, like him. (she had 13 cats of her own) <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smirk.gif" alt="" />

I have many more but I am starting to forget. If I remember, I'll give you some more.

Gosh, what were they thinking???
bb

WW: I am not sure what OM wants so I don't know what I am going to do yet. I just don't want to hurt anyone.

WW: This is my life you don't have anything to do with it. (this one seems common and very confusing to me)

OK-
I'm mostly a lurker here...just recently started posting, and haven't told my whole story here, so a very brief history first...

Wife began an online emotional affair that lasted for about two months before I finally got my 'proof'. When I confronted her, he purchased her plane tickets to fly to live with him...and she was going, even though they NEVER MET ONCE IN PERSON! She had ONE pic of him, and she admitted later once she was out of the fog she had no idea how old that pic might have been. Flight was scheduled for several days after d-day...she didn't go, but that's another story.

So...on the day she was supposed to get on the plane, we're 'discussing' things, and in a moment of anger she asks me...

"Can't you just let me go to him and see if what we've got works in person, and just come back home if it doesn't?!?!"


EXCUSE ME?!?!?! ROFLMBO!

Another goodie, not quite alien speak tho. Post withdrawl, we're coming back from a trip to our counselor. She's driving, and I'm reading out loud the into and table of contents from a book that our counselor recommended (20 (Suprisingly Simple) Rules and Tools for a Great Marriage, by Dr. Steve Stephens). Remember, her OM was a guy we BOTH had gamed online with. She had met him online, and introduced him to me online as well..was supposedly a friend to both of us, since I gamed with him too...

I get to Chapter 15: Make Mutual Friends.

She looks at me, gets a sheepish look on her face, and says in a quiet little voice with just a hint of humor...

"Well....I tried!"

I gaped at her for a moment, thought about it, and we both ended up laughing so hard she nearly wrecked the van!!! Side note...that particular trip home we got lost, and ended up finding our new wedding band set that we wear now! Was actually a good day! LOL

"If I ever found a woman who was as loyal and dependable as my truck, I'd love her."

For background: His darned truck broke down on me at least once every two months. I'd recently heard the "I don't love you and never did" speech. I'd been the most faithful wife on the planet while he went on multiple deployments. He'd been traveling the world, telling women he was divorced, and sleeping with them.

"I think you're getting fat."

At 5'7" and 127 pounds, I don't think so. He, however, had gained about 30 pounds or more since we married.

"I did it because I couldn't believe that a woman who looked that good would want to date me."

I saw pics of this OW. She looked remarkably like me.

"I didn't do that with the intention of cheating on you."

His explanation of why he told everyone he knew overseas that he was divorced.

How about:

I think you'd like her. I can see you both a year from now pushing the kids in a stroller at the mall.

Again (I've posted this before):

I wish I could take your stability and her party-ness and mush them together into one person.

[censored].

On the upside, the fog is lifted now and I've recieved apologies in spades for all he's said and done.

- Kimmy

[color:"purple"]My favorite quote did not come from my H's lips. I read it here on MB.

A BW wrote her WH said this to her in all sincerity:

"It's YOUR FAULT I am forced to marry OW because you won't let her see the kids if she's involved in adultery!"

I laughed my butt off reading that testimony to his devotion and everlasting love of his OW. According to him .... he had no intention of marrying OW without this little legal problem arranged in their divorce agreement.

LOL

Pep <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/cool.gif" alt="" /> [/color]

This came one night after he had moved out and I found they were both on IM at the same time...

"She is helping me figure things out, she is helping me with our M." Eeeek!

Today is not a good day....pretty POed at him today.

Some after-recovery talk would be....

"Why can't you just get over it?"

"Why do you always have to bring THAT up?" (I mention it about once a month or less now.)

"I don't think about her until you bring her up."

"Why do you want to know...it's only going to hurt you, and I don't want to hurt you anymore." (How kind of him)

And my favorite (remember, I'm having a bad day)

"I'll never cheat on you again." Those words are about as valuable as the air used to speak them...only action will help...

If I hear one more time "Godd marriage gone bad" I'll scream <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/mad.gif" alt="" />

Here are my two personal favorites from my WS. I've repeated them many times before here and Pep's certainly heard them before, but it's a good reminder for me to re-state them for my continued reassurance of the existance of semi-intelligent alien life forms.

#1

Me: Please quit lying and sneaking around. Everybody knows you're having an affair with OM.

Her: I am NOT HAVING AN AFFAIR!!!! I'm IN LOVE with OM! What part of that DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND?????

#2
(Discussion regarding her decision to move out of our house after I stated I didn't want to separate)

Her: I HAVE to leave because it was YOUR decision NOT to leave!!!

When confronted with phone bills proving 40 calls to her in a month & his denial, and I needed some business info from her and had to have him call her in my presence....
he said

"Oh, it's OK to call her for business but not pleasure?"

Danneill

Hey Pebs:

Great post. This will be fun for many. Here are a few of mine:

1. "God wants us to be happy". WXW talking about A w/OM prior to our D. She said this to: our DD's, my family & her family. Her Mom bought it!

2. "Our DD12 will be fine. She likes OM". OM was a friend. OM & OMW used to spend much time with our family. Of course DD liked him then!!! DD19 "hates the weasel"!

3. "You should like and accept OM; your Dad wanted OM to be your Godparent". 2 years prior to A starting; WXW and I considered 4 couples to talk to about being Godparents to DD's, OM and OMW were one of the couples discussed.

4. "OM knows just what to say to me"! Duh - ya think? OM is saying the same thing to 2 other women.

5. "OM and I are 'pre-engaged' just waiting on OM to D OMW." OM and OMW still married and together. No papers filed, no attorney seen, nothing! (See #4!) <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

FR

Here is my fav regarding OW #2 "I'll never cheat on HER!"
Regarding OW #1 "I know it's wrong but I going to keep doing it!" that was in response to my outing him to OWH.
Recently regarding OW #3,"why do you need to know, it is already over?" <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/confused.gif" alt="" />

Oh gosh just writing this stuff out makes me queasy.

Ok, in all fairness in my OWN fog way back when "we're just friends!" "He's lonely and needs someone to talk to"

Ugh, can't believe that cr*p came out of my mouth.

Here is one so new I haven't really laughed at it yet, I just heard it on Sunday. On Sat, I drove by W's work, a furnished model home she was cleaning. OM's car was there, and the model wasn't due to open for four hours. I avoided the confrontation, and didn't see W until Sun morning. After lying and saying she didn't see him ,she realized that I knew, and said,
"Yeah, I saw him, he called me up to say he had a big bowl of fruit, and he came over so we could eat it for lunch "(10am)

That is a fruity story to be sure. Stay tuned for more whoppers! I get a new one everyday.