I've only got 30 more productive years left, and I would hate to waste them with another nutcase.

So, what have you and your son been up to? Built any cool Lego creations lately?

He's spontaneously reading the scoreboards and game hints now. I'm so easily excited <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/tongue.gif" alt="" />.

We were going to fly to Alaska for the day tomorrow, but decided to wait until Friday when it's sunny. It will be sunny and warm here tomorrow.

Gimble seems to think I'll be pleasantly surprised with the outcome. I hope so.

I can see the heat waves hovering over the street outside. After this threadjack, I'll have to go see if the clothes I put in the freezer are ready.

As a teacher (I've taught 2nd, 3rd, and 4th grade), I think spontaneous reading is a great reason to be excited. It's a very good sign of progress.

Again, you're full of [censored]. I didn't delete those
files for her, I deleted them for MYSELF. I was in NO
WAY manipulated by her. I can think for myself, thank
you. You invaded MY privacy. No matter what you
think, and i'm documenting it with written word, I did
it for myself. So stop putting the blame on her. She
has not cost "us" 20,000 dollars. it was YOU that
withdrew your joiner, trying to fix an already
Demolished marriage. It was YOU that called the
police and changed your story. It was YOU that hired
an attorney and lied about it. It was YOU that called
the police. I remember, vividly, when you told me the
next morning that she was "swinging a cutting board at
you," and that you were nervous because "the knives
were just a few feet away." Then, I also recall,
vividly, when we were in the jaguar and you were
taking me to the airport and you said you called the
police because "I was afraid i might snap and harm
her." [censored]. Again, i vividly remember you saying
to pastor rody, not too long after mom left my eagle
reception that "I hope the police don't have to get
involved." [color:"blue"]Maybe because she was drinking and crazy[/color] You had it planned, you want custody of
DS8, and this was your means of attaining it.
Another thing, that "beachhouse" that i live
in...You're very willing to sell it, so you can keep
your 850,000 dollar house.(It's not worth that much). You're incredibly selfish. You asked her to marry you. You
should have known what you were getting yourself into.
Now you're trying to make mom pay. Be a man...f$%k.
You're not concerned for my well-being, or hers. You
said she shouldn't put me down as an expense, even
though all of the 18 year olds i know, besides
marissa, are very dependent on their parents. You're
the one not being honest here. You're words and
misleading actions have caused irreversable damage to
our relationship.

sending that email out to all of her coworkers was
completely unnecessary. Then, you even sent one out
to the members at the club. [color:"blue"](I don't remember doing that) [/color] You're out to protect
yourself and make sure you have friends, while making
mom look like [censored]. What you're doing is wrong.
You're the worst role model. You never could admit
you were wrong, and you never once apologized to me
when we had arguments or quarrels. [color:"blue"]( I did sometimes) [/color] You need to make
yourself feel better by trying to make someone else
feel like [censored], at least I know I will grow to be a
better man, a bigger person, that will know when
enough is enough. [color:"blue"](He's off to a fine start) <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" /> [/color] Also, mom didn't "kidnap" DS8
like you say...It was YOU that took him to Montana,
very deceitfully, and i imagine, at the lawyer you
didn't have's advice. You're so full of [censored]. If
anyone was doing the kidnapping, it was you. Mom
simply walked into the house, and took DS8...there
was no forced entry, DS8 did not detest her taking
him away. Then You called the police on her, AGAIN,
finding Lisa's address on my email, thanks to your 40
dollar monitoring program. You even went on to tell
them that "she's previously been arrested." I can't
believe you.

Damion, I'm sorry you've been so confused. You have said so many things that are just not true, that I don't think replying will do any good.

Good luck

Of course, I think he's in some turmoil or he wouldn't be so outwardly indignant. I forwarded the correspondence to my lawyer, who told me just to stop talking to him.

He's definitely in turmoil, and handling it very immaturely. I hope you're planning to follow your lawyer's advice (although it must be hard not to respond). He's going to feel awful when he finds out the truth.

A restraining order restraining you from ?

If he is lucky, he will grow up by the time he is 20 or so. If he does and he still has his sanity and most of his teeth, he will have done well. In the mean time, he is beyond your reach. He could take instruction easier from an automated fortune teller at a circus.

The rocket was 8 feet tall, and exceeded 11,000 feet in altitude. We have a bunch of normal ones too.

I had started this message to you yesterday since you I did not receive a response to my voice mail message.  So, thank you for the message today documenting the new times that I can call my son. I appreciate the response even though it was a day later than I expected.
 
I also appreciate your acknowledgment of my visitation request made 7/11/05.  I hope in the future as we discuss the subject of visitations (you to Europe/me to Seattle)…it won’t take 10 days to respond.    
 
All confrontation aside, WWJD is a phrase I am sure you are familiar with. I suspect that you have thought about it a lot lately... with respect to your actions and our lives.  What does it really mean to you? The phrase is something that I use to remind myself of what is really right or wrong.  What is the bigger thing to do… what is the selfless act that should be done for the greater good. With that, I honestly ask you to help me better understand a few things.  
 
You have said that “I started all of this and I can make it stop anytime”.  Do you really believe that? I did not back out of an agreement, hire a lawyer on the 26th of April, or create a lie to mislead people into a plan that keep DS8 in Seattle.
 
WWJD here?  Did He use lies and deceit to achieve His end means or did He speak His mind and His thoughts directly, accepting the consequences.   I think we could have talked about what your concerns were, and discussed what would be best for DS8.  Certainly you can admit that your actions were not in his interest. They will be memories that he will have for the rest of his life.  Why was the deception necessary? (This one just floored me! DECEPTION??)
 
Your message of 5/9/05 said… “I also realized that while married to you, I was willing to fly to Paris every two weeks and support your position in Paris with DS8 there too, assuming that I would eventually move that way.  If we’re no longer to be married, I can’t make that same huge commitment of time and energy to support your career that I have no relationship with.”   This seems focused on you – not DS8. (I'm focusing on DS8 by keeping him in the U.S.) <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" /> 
 
Knowing that DS8 was with me, with the aid of your computer monitoring system, you still chose to call the police, for a 2nd time, rather than to come over or call to talk to me directly.  (This shows total amnesia. I had NO idea where DS8 was when she had abducted him. I called her cel phone twice. I called her hotel in DC, I called S18, I called the woman whose house she stayed at the previous night. NO ANSWER ANYWHERE <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/mad.gif" alt="" />) You said you never wanted the first call to the police to be held against me, yet you involved the DV unit the 2nd time, even knowing it was not a DV issue. The police report verifies this.  This really hurts me. (Awwww <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" /> I called the cops because my son was missing and I had NO idea where he was! I searched the neighborhood and made a bunch of phone calls BEFORE I called the cops)   
 
WWJD here?  I truthfully hope that you just didn’t think out your actions, and that you acted in anger but still WWJD? (Anger NOTHING. I was SCARED) I don’t think that he would not have chosen a path towards destruction -of a friendship.  (Ummm. You're right. You did that!!) The first restraining order was issued only because I did not know what else you had done or put in place. (You would have known nothing was in place if you had talked to me) It only requested that the original agreed to parenting plan be put in place temporarily. It was intended to take us back to where we were before so we could try to move forward together from there.      
 
In sending the letter to my co-workers and friends you stated “ I wanted to let you hear my perspective on some rumors that are running around about Lirio and I (me)”…The content of the letter did not appear to be in the interest of DS8, but only seemed to satisfy your need for vengeance… WWJD… I don’t think this would have been an action that he would have taken. (Vengeance nothing. She had told some of our friends I was evil, controlling and violent! That's my reputation too.)
 
You say you want the boys to have a happy and healthy mom. But I ask you to really look at yourself and me on this one.  I AM happy now, and I AM healthy. Even though things are incredibly tough now with DS8 being bounced around, I finally know that for my personal well-being (Thinking about DS8 again?), I have made the right decisions. Since March, I have not had a migraine headache…. something I’ve had for the last 10 years every month. I have not had that nagging pain in my 6/7th vertebrae… REALLY – it is kind of ironic.  It is as if a huge burden has been lifted off of me when I made the decision to finally start the paperwork for the divorce.  Since you and I have separated, the only times I felt unhappy were when we continued to talk to keep the marriage in play.  Do you know how many times you mentioned the “information on the marriagebuilders site…” in all your emails? Look into your heart. You know what is right for us.  Even with the really difficult bumps that we have faced these last months – you must know that I am happier. (I don't really care at this point!)  I just want to see DS8 be happy too.
     
On March 25th, you wrote “I’m going to continue to treat you with all the respect you deserve as my wife, I made a promise to you before God to do that. When the divorce is final. I’ll take off the ring and give up my commitment to you”….are your actions reflective of this statement?  I gave your ring back, I told you we were separated on 2/27/05 when I was led out of the house… Since then, I had no commitment to our marriage. I was honest with myself to God. I was honest with you when you asked me questions of my feelings.  I never miss-led you to think we would stay married. But the relationship was still valuable to me.  The legal paperwork, which keeps us married can be erased at any time, but a marriage that is in the heart will stay forever. 
 
Look at Friend 1 and Friend 2- they love each other. They fell in love when he was still married – on paper. (His wife left him two years before and the divorce had already started <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" />) How were you able to “tolerate that he (she) was willing to have sex with a married (wo)man? Especially when you say “I(you) have no tolerance for any (wo)man with that little character” ? 
 
For DS8s sake, I have to ask – if you truly loved someone, how do you go out and hurt them for the sake of vengeance? (Ummm. I'm not vengeful) I have loved and been hurt before, and I simply walked away.  Those people that I loved have come back into my life--- because it was love, and they are still in my life in a different way. For me, if I truly loved someone, even if I was hurt, I still only wanted to see that person be happy, because… I loved them. Your actions make me think that you never loved me and only wanted to possess the image of whatever I was you.
 
Your keep saying that you are only doing what is best for DS8… I ask you to honestly look into your heart and see if you REALLY believe that what you have been doing is best for DS8? (YES <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/cool.gif" alt="" />)  When you think of DS8 looking back on this when he is an adult, will you still think this is for his interest?  WWJD? (Jesus would reach out and heal you. He would tell you to go forth and sin no more.) I tried that and it didn't work <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/crazy.gif" alt="" />
 
At this point, it is out of our hands…So, long story short (TOO LATE!), I ask, can we try to make this better for DS8. I want to be able to talk to him without having to deal with the phone off the hook, or the answering machine off, or the fax machine coming on.  You used to be accessible on your cell phone all the time, now it is on silent, or the battery is dead or you just didn’t check your messages…. I just want to talk to my baby. When he is in Paris, he is with me and my cell phone is always with me- you can always reach him (No, I can't), I would not keep him from you. (So please explain the restraining order and abduction again <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" />)
 
The main issues with DS8 will be determined on August 18th.  At that point there will be a loser… and it will be DS8 (I was kinda hoping it would be her) He will be losing one of us, but as he already knows, he has already lost “US” because of all that has transpired between you and me.  "Sleepless" – if you have the heart of the person I thought you were, you can’t be happy about how this has turned out. (CORRECT!)  I find it to be a travesty.  I miss him horribly when he is not with me (Good thing I don't that makes it all better), and you know that. But as I said, it is out of our hands now.  
 
Since DS8’s future is out of our hands, I want us to try and find a way to reach a reasonable and timely agreement on our assets, so that we can eliminate the costs of the lawyers as quickly as possible (Too late for that too), and allow us both to move on with our lives in the new world where DS8 has only one of us at a time. We have a couple of options, both of which can lead to a 50/50 division.  I hope that you are willing to move forward on this aspect of the divorce, so we can both make the best of a really bad situation.(That you created)
 
If we should need to sell everything it would be best to get that decided up front so we can get the process moving. Waiting only means we pay longer for something we are going to lose.  
 
Sleepless – you don’t know how much I miss the man I thought I knew a long time ago….(You mean the one who always let you have your way and tried to make you happy??? <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/mad.gif" alt="" />)
 
WW

I get the feeling she's still trying to blame this on me. Am I missing something?

WWJD here? Did He use lies and deceit to achieve His end means or did He speak His mind and His thoughts directly, accepting the consequences. I think we could have talked about what your concerns were, and discussed what would be best for DS8.

Well, Sleepless, you know I'm no expert, but what I got out of it was "me, me, meeee, me, me, meeeeeee - it's all about meeeeee" and "it's all your fault, you're being so mean to meeeeeee!"