Well I have been in contact with my STBXW? a few more time since my last post and she has told me that we need to talk. I could n ot agree more but I wonder how should I go about this so that I do not offend her? I would love to end up happy with her but I can understand that sometimes it just is not meant to be. Should I lay down smoe groud rules or just outline goals for the talk? Is it too soon for any sort of goals to be put on the table? She seem genuine in her desire to get to the bottom of something she just has not told me what it is yet. How do I bring up the hard things (EA) without totally shutting down all helpfull talks? I really do not want to make an idiot of myself so any advice would really help. I know that some on this board have managed to save their marriages I hope that they may be of some help. Ask any questions you want I will get back to you as soon as I can. Thanks all, John