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#1357130 04/13/05 07:52 AM
Joined: Oct 2004
Posts: 139
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Posts: 139
A few weeks ago my friend tells me she has been texting back and forth with her H's brother <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/ooo.gif" alt="" /> red flag real quick for me. I raise my eye brow and she told me not to look at her that way. They are only friends, he's really sweet and makes her laugh but that's it nothing further.

BUT the bil is saying he wants them to get together so they can talk. I told my friend she needs to stop NOW, she is married and has NO business texting her H's brother like this, especially without him knowing.

Now her H is thinking she is having an affair and thinks it's either his brother or best friend. She has gone and met the bil, they've cuddled but never kissed or had sex. I told her she is crossing the line, how would she feel if her H was doing that with another woman? She was quiet

Now that her H is suspicious she mentioned it to bil and he's acting weird. She is all bent out of shape and hurt. I told her who cares don't worry about it, she needs to concentrate on her husband and worry about getting their marriage better. I told her about this site and explained about love bank and all that good stuff.

You wanna talk about fog? I explained that to her to, it's truly amazing how thick it can get and how it messes with a person's thinking

I don't know what else to do or say to her. She asked me if I would cover for her one time when she wanted to go talk to bil and I said noway keep me out of it.....

Has anyone else had this happen to them?


BS 33 FWH 31 married 3.5 yrs together 6 yrs DD 15 DD 8 DS 5 my story [url=http://www.marriagebuilders.com/cgi-bin/ultimatebb.cgi?ubb=get_topic;f=37;t=033315]http://www.marriagebuilders.com/cgi-bin/ultimatebb.cgi?ubb=get_topic;f=37;t=033315[/url] **Be careful, what goes around, comes around**
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 59
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Honestly, there isn't a darn thing that you can tell your friend that she'll listen to at this point. IMHO, the best thing you can do is to talk with her H. Let him know what's going on, and let him handle it from there. Then tell your friend what you've done...after all, if you're REALLY her friend, you're only doing something to help HER with this.

Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 314
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Enchanted, I'm with Karegh. Tell the husband. This has to be one of the most devastating kind of A's. Not only is the M being jeopardized so is the brothers. You would be doing him a double favor and saving him two very important people in his life. And from experience I really believe the friend would thank you. You certainly have no agenda and no way to benefit from doing this. When the fog lifts your friend will realize that and thank you. And I think the H will be eternally grateful. I know I never forgot who tried to help me and who enabled during my W's A. Good luck.

WOE


(F)WS - 46
BH - 46
S21,D19,D15
d-day 2-28-02
ONS-continuing contact

Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 4,178
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RAT
THEM
OUT

GC


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