Nothing earth shattering to report, I just got my DSL line hooked up yesterday, so I hadn't been able to post in a few weeks.

Things are pretty rocky, I'm not going to lie to you, but the good times generally outweigh the bad, we hit rough patches when I need more reassurance than he is capable of giving me right now. It's hard for me to remember that he's going through withdrawl, I love him like I always have, and he has to regain his love for me.....It's only been about 2 1/2 weeks...I'm tending to try to rush things, then I pull back and think about it, and realize that I'm asking WAY to much from him.

He is home every night right after work, he calls me or I call him several times a day while we're working. I have taken Thursdays off as that is his day off, so that we can spend quality time together.

He is still of the opinion that he may never feel the same way about me again....I don't argue with him, even though that comment crushes me everytime I hear it. He has wicked ups and downs....it's only during the downs that he tells me he feels that way. On up days I get flowers and phone calls that he misses me.

He gets off work here in a few minutes, he called me and told me he wants to go shopping after work so I'm just waiting for him to get here so that we can leave.

I am having the girls go to bed by about 10:30 every night...even on the weekends (He get's home from work @ 9pm)so that I can have some alone time with him...I don't really have anyone to babysit for the kids so we can go out on a date, because my Mom watches the kids while I'm at work, so I don't like to ask her to do any more than she does.

The house has been sparkling clean....it got a little messy yesterday because I worked all day, and then didn't get home until 10:30 pm because I took DD20 out to dinner for her birthday, so I didn't do laundry or dishes yesterday...I made up for that today though.

Whelp I'm outta here, I'll write more tommorrow.

-Caren

Caren -

Good to hear from you!

I was a bit worried....

Welcome back!

TM

Welcome back Caren! Did he move back home?
I must have missed something a long the way. I followed your plan B thread very closely.


Whoa-- talk about confusing the heck out of you huh?
My WH does things like that too and I just don't know
what to think sometimes.
Glad to have you back!!

When a WS babbles as such, the BS should realize it as babble. Happens to most WS. After all they have become accustomed to hurting the family so those babble slip ups (which make no sense whatsoever - hence the title babble) it just makes the BS want to hit the Xws upside the head and say 'hey that was a stupid comment'. See the Xws don't all bounce back to sanity right away. Kinda like par for the course.

I would find a way to remind him that he is babbling. For me I would first be gentle about it then afterwards, just came straight out and said he was talking stupid instead of logical and to let me know when he regained his sanity, then he would have the privilege of my listening ear. He was made to realize communication was a privilege in our family and WS babble was NOT tolerated. This was another one of my boundaries.

When the Xws was allowed to return home, his entry back came with a price. Our family is valuable and each member needed t/b a valuable contributing member. Right now our son gets to live here because we love him and are responsible for him. The WS or Xws is not an H so we are NOT responsible for such a wayard person. On the other hand we do love and are responsible for caring for and being cared by our H and father so that character was welcomed back.....not that babble WS or Xws.

This is where recovery can get hard and mucked up. Just keep things in proper perspective.

Hope this helps.
L.