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Just checking in! Good news?
#1362519 04/25/05 02:00 PM
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 183
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-ConfusedinWv-
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-ConfusedinWv-
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It is not every day that someone comes here to post good news but here it goes. My wife and I have been thinking and have decided to work things out. Despite the EA/PA I think with hard work we can both make it happen. I would like to thank LordsLady for her calm wisdom. You helped me through many a hard night. And to anybody who reads this Listen to TooMuchCoffeeMan he knows what he is talking about. The advice here has not always been easy but it has been dead on accurate. Thanks to all for your help I may be hanging around here in the future so TTYL all, John

Trying to work things out! (I hope this works...) WW-23 Me-26 After multiple EAs and multiple PAs she seems to have come crashing back to earth in flames. Here I am again cleaning up the mess.....
Re: Just checking in! Good news?
-ConfusedinWv- #1362520 04/25/05 02:50 PM
Joined: Jan 2002
Posts: 6,950
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Quote
It is not every day that someone comes here to post good news but here it goes. My wife and I have been thinking and have decided to work things out. Despite the EA/PA I think with hard work we can both make it happen. I would like to thank LordsLady for her calm wisdom. You helped me through many a hard night.

That is great news but remember that recovery doesn't happen in one day. BOTH of you have to remember that marital and personal recoveries are one day at a time processes that cannot and should not be rushed. As I said in my previous post to you, if money is an issue, then consider explaining to your W that purchasing the Marriage Builders Home Study Courses is one of the best investments the two of you can make to transform your marriage into a healthy and happy one. Beg, borrow, steal [scratch this last one <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/pfft.gif" alt="" />] but get them and knock both yourselves out doing the assignments.

Quote
And to anybody who reads this Listen to TooMuchCoffeeMan he knows what he is talking about.

I do? <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/confused.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />
Re: Just checking in! Good news?
-ConfusedinWv- #1362521 04/26/05 12:57 AM
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 2,076
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lordslady Offline
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I'm really happy for you! Like TMCM said, things don't just get better overnight. It takes time for trust to rebuild and for some of the hurt to go away, but it does.

You will probably experience things that trigger memories for a while, but they will become less over time. And really, I think even if one ends up divorced and finds someone new, it's not like the memories will just go away. Things will still trigger them. In my opinion, unless you're also dealing with alcoholism/drugs or some other ugliness like that, you are much better off trying to save the marriage.

Again, best wishes to you both! Take one day at a time and stay strong! It'll take guts and determination, but I believe you won't regret it.

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