I hope I'm not infringing on website rights or something but I found this on today's devotional for Charles Stanley and it stirred my heart.

Thought I would share - just something to think about.

"Looking at the love of Jesus Christ at the cross, I see the most perfect demonstration of love to be found anywhere. The Savior showed us how unlimited His love is—He gave us Himself and withheld nothing! (Romans 8:32) He also let go of the control that was rightly His. He did not give His love to manipulate us, but rather He gave us a free will so that we could choose to accept or reject Him. And He loved us with vulnerability, already knowing His love would be rejected—even ignored or mocked. In loving with His whole heart, He was willing to be turned down and hurt. "

Have a great weekend!!!!

I Thess. 5:18.......my life long verse, but tonite I have never felt more alone. Christian couple in
Gods house 4 services a week, teach a teen class, married 12 years, i find out on our anniv. that she has had a affair. I'll pray for you.......please pray for me, thank you

((((((((((olerl))))))))))

As a brother in Christ who, 3 years ago, was where you find yourself today, let me say I truly understand the "alone" feeling. Olerl....you are NOT alone....not in the family of God.

Let me also tell you that God has NOT abandoned you or forsaken you. Let me assure you that even through the pain and hurt and anguish you are feeling, God WILL work to let you know that He is there for you REGARDLESS of the evil that has come into your life.

What is situation with your wife? A past affair or an ongoing affair? How did you find you find out? There is much to be done, and prayer is ONE obvious area, but so are the "rescue boats" that God directs be sent your way.

Give us some idea of what's going on and what has been going on and we will try to help. When one member of the "family of God" hurts, we all hurt.

This is going to be an extremely trying time for you, and for your wife if she is repentant of her sin. So let me give you both "my" verse to cling to. Perhaps it will become another "life verse" for the two of you.

Philippians 4:13. "I can do all things THROUGH Christ who gives me strength."

As Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego trusted God (knowing that the furnace killed anyone cast into it), trust God that no matter what "evil" befalls, there is redemption and hope in the ONE in whom we trust. According to His mercy, we are sealed for eternity and we have His help in dealing with the evils and hurts of THIS world.

God bless.

my wife started a new job, and has shown quick success. S fellow co-worker befriended her and as I started noticing a change in her, i followed her for a couple days. She ended up at his home in country. I was curious and looked into his windows only to see her in his arms....I was crushed. I confronted her on our anniv. and she admitted to a affair and to sleeping w/him. Although she went to the alter to confess her sin, Im not as forgiving as God <im sorry>. I cannot stop thinking about it and cannot sleep or eat. I started shaking in my hands and cant control it. I confronted this co-worker on the phone and told him i knew everything about the affair. I also prayed for him, but with much false care i guess. i have never felt so alone, and its killing me. I love her but i cant stop thinking about it.

olerl - I know. My wife's affair was ongoing and 6 years in length when I found photographic evidence of her affair. I know. I couldn't eat or sleep. I lost 20-30 pounds, I accused God of being unfaithful to His covenantal promise in our marriage....I know.

Most men, are very visual and the "mental movies" are crushing and intensely painful. I know, they are still there, but safely locked away in a deep dark dungeon-like corner of my mind.

Let me just give you a "lifeline" to cling to right now....what you are feeling and thinking is a NORMAL reaction to the discovery the deepest betrayal that can be done by someone to someone else. It gives you a small glimpse in to God's pain over the adultery of mankind.

Lifeline: It WILL get better...but it will take take time. One step at time.

I have two pamphlets that might help you and your wife. Our Marriage Counselor gave them to us as a starting point when we began counseling to try to recover our marriage. If you'd like them, send me an email to mbforeverhers@yahoo.com and I will email them back to you.

The first pamphlet is called What Do You Do When Your Marriage Goes Sour? and the second pamphlet is called Marriage, Whose Dream?

In addition, let me give you a link to a thread I began a year after we were in recover that goes into forgiveness and trust. Hopefully you will find some things in there (it's a fairly long thread) that will give you some additional help.

Lastly, if you and your wife are trying to recover your marriage, let me STRONGLY suggest you get into Joint Christian Marital Counseling. "Do it yourself" is not a good idea initially. There will come a time when counseling needs to end, but for now you both need a guide who will both help you be obedient to God and to hold you both accountable.

Here's the link I mentioned:

Forgive? Trust? Really? Has anything been learned in the past year?

God bless and keep posting.