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Yeah, sure....go ahead and blame your parents. Everyone always does. And, of course, it's always the parents' fault.
<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/tongue.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/tongue.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/tongue.gif" alt="" />
<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" />

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Hear, hear!

<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />


A smooth sea never made a skilled mariner.
~ English proverb



Neak's Story
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Thanks rella, I will then !! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/cool.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/cool.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/cool.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/cool.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/cool.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/cool.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/cool.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/cool.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/cool.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/cool.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/cool.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/cool.gif" alt="" />

Neak - naughty girl you'll get grounded AGAIN!!! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/shocked.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/shocked.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/shocked.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/shocked.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/shocked.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/shocked.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/shocked.gif" alt="" />

I'm a slow reader or reader who's a bit slow, depends on the subject and the internal workings - or not workings <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/confused.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/confused.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/confused.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/confused.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/confused.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/confused.gif" alt="" />

tl your story of MS speaks of regrets. Nothing you could have done of course the war did that and I'm afraid you and I are not enough to change the horror of that time and place.

Myself I was in 'love' with my future H. He was handsome, this big broad country boy with a devil may care attitude and I have to admit the moment he said he loved me I shucked my clothes so fast you'd have thought it was a race. Sex there was a lot of. Quite a bit, too much, seeing as when he got drafted we got engaged I got pregnant he went to a camp for basic training I suppose its called.
Of course I was the 'shame' of the family, being Catholic I was on the slippery slide to h*ll already. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/shocked.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/shocked.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/shocked.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/shocked.gif" alt="" />
Then I did the really unthinkable, I actually gave birth to a child while unmarried!! The stones were being polished for the event so as to give good effect I suppose!! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" />

Oh my, AW just to reassure you I was married when you were born ok? Yes it was the SAME man - in body anyway. You won't need any counselling on this subject I promise.

Ok to cut a long story short, he FINALLY got leave and came back and did the RIGHT thing as my mum said, he married his soiled dove and we were supposed to live happily ever after.
My dear ol dad to give him his due, told me "I'll look after your mum, marry him only if its right for you ok Kitten" - his name for his silly daughter being me.
Of course I was in LOVE.

So we married, spent a week at Rottnest Island and then he told me the BIG secret - he was going to Vietnam the next month. What a lovely way to start married life!

But I was the daughter and grand daughter of ANZAC soldiers so i would handle it like my mum and gran did. Yes no problem, I , no we could do this. How innocent was I ? I learnt very quickly that having sex, having a baby did not suudenly invoke within some vast inherited wisdom or knowledge.

I was dumb and young, or vice versa. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/crazy.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/crazy.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/crazy.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/crazy.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/crazy.gif" alt="" />

I can only say that it was a very 'energetic' time for us and I was - how to put it delicately - extremely biblical with grumpy !! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/blush.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/blush.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/blush.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/blush.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/blush.gif" alt="" />

I'll not say much about those days and weeks and months but some time after the battle of Long Tan he came home a strange, bitter, angry man.
I wonder now if after a few years of this if I did not become a strange, bitter, angry woman?
Some room for thought, but maybe not <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/frown.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/frown.gif" alt="" />

well as Mikey has woken and is making himself loudly known I will end with this - Grumpy never took his anger out on us his family, he just closed himself off from us more often than not. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/mad.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/mad.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/mad.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/mad.gif" alt="" />


Life may feel as if you are constantly getting kicked on a daily basis, living is about picking yourself up each day and going on and on and on regardless.

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I was - how to put it delicately - extremely biblical with grumpy !! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

Did all that "knowing' make you very wise? (Neaksis eye-closing alert) It's never worked for me!! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" /> Even when it existed, back in the long ago and far away. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/blush.gif" alt="" /> (OK, you can open them back up again.) That closed-off stuff is certainly something with which I'm familiar, however. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/crazy.gif" alt="" /> They're there, but not really. It's a strange world to try and inhabit for a lifetime. Looking at it from the other end of my lifetime, I wouldn't have believed it if somebody told me...and looking at it from this end of my lifetime, it's hard to believe even though I've told it myself. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/confused.gif" alt="" />

t&l

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Did all that "knowing' make you very wise?


Oh goodness no <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/crazy.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/crazy.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/crazy.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/crazy.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/crazy.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/crazy.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/crazy.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/crazy.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/crazy.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/crazy.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/crazy.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/crazy.gif" alt="" />

I suppose what wisdom I have gained in this aspect of my life is from knowing that all that I tried did not work <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" />

So I to a certain degree accepted what was, is. I understood there was love - his version of it anyway - I worked out eventually after many years that he showed it the way he could by working to make a living for us his family. Not particularly fulfilling for myself but there you are - that’s life.

I had dreams of a different future, a different present I find myself in as far as my marriage is concerned.

I will say that in the last few years he has become better for short periods in actually expressing a loving emotion between us. It quite unsettles me <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/crazy.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/crazy.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/crazy.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/crazy.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/crazy.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/crazy.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/crazy.gif" alt="" />

Quote
That closed-off stuff
yes , what else can be said. Come this far but no further - perhaps there is a sign somewhere that says abandon all hope ye who passes beyond this point ??? <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" />

So So sadly I feel it happening to Aussie as well. You know he actually shudders when someone hugs him. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/teary.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/teary.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/teary.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/teary.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/teary.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/teary.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/teary.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/teary.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/teary.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/teary.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/teary.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/teary.gif" alt="" />
I mean the kids, AW, me, - anyone you can see him steeling himself to accept someone’s initial touch. Oh my that hurts.
And then he gets all embarrassed and starts being that well known species called a "CLAM".

Of course in my well known gentle fashion of a bull in a china shop - well Buffalo-ess <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> - I put it out there for all to see when I feel its required. No latitude on this subject with him at all. He is not going to be another grumpy for my daughter if I have anything to say about it.
<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/mad.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/mad.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/mad.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/mad.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/mad.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/mad.gif" alt="" />

Of course its a bit late to note that daughters often "marry their fathers". Guilty!! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/eek.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/eek.gif" alt="" />


Life may feel as if you are constantly getting kicked on a daily basis, living is about picking yourself up each day and going on and on and on regardless.

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Oh and yes

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Of course its a bit late to note that daughters often "marry their fathers". Guilty!! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/eek.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/eek.gif" alt="" />



there is no need for any deep analysis on this, I can't afford it <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" />


Life may feel as if you are constantly getting kicked on a daily basis, living is about picking yourself up each day and going on and on and on regardless.

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There are also husbands who cope with wives that are closed off to them. It's good when both are willing to work for a better relationship. Often one or the other believes it can't happen. (meaning improvement)

Sometimes there is really no way to break through and have meaningful communication with a person we don't understand. Often there is a way - my W and I are glad we found it for us. It's far from perfect, but it is improving.

SS


I think sometimes about all the pain in the world. I hope we can ease that here, even if only a little bit.
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Tonight, HP is taking me out for Chinese at my favorite restaurant. I accept the invitation for what it is and will enjoy it as such. We'll talk about a variety of superficial topics as our conversational boat skims across the Pool of Introspection, and never admit that there are still fierce creatures lurking just below its placid surface. And you know what? I'm OK with that. In fact, I'm more than OK with that. I'm FINE with that. So what if it's not what I was dreaming of when I was 21? It's what I've got now, and as far as I'm concerned, it's better than fighting. Better than hatred, anger, and unremitting hostility. He does what he's able to do and it would be unkind not to accept his effort in the spirit in which it's offered.

Of course, tomorrow he may be as annoying as all get-out--and I'll be hopping mad about it, too--but tonight is tonight and I'm not living tomorrow till I get there.

That's my story, and I'm sticking to it!! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/pfft.gif" alt="" />

t&l, off to vote against everything I don't like! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

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Of course its a bit late to note that daughters often "marry their fathers". Guilty!! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/eek.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/eek.gif" alt="" />

I'm going to have to think about this one. Except for the fact that they can both be cranky, I've never thought Neak's husband and her dad resembled each other much. Scary thought. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/eek.gif" alt="" />, is right. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/crazy.gif" alt="" />

t&l

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Is it election day? Rats!


A smooth sea never made a skilled mariner.
~ English proverb



Neak's Story
Neak #1374629 06/06/06 07:26 PM
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VOTE NO ON EVERYTHING SAVE US ALL THE TROUBLE <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/eek.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/eek.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/eek.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/eek.gif" alt="" />


Happily recovered!and Happily Married :0)

Commit your works to the LORD and your plans will be established.
Proverbs 16:3
AJ_ #1374630 06/06/06 07:41 PM
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Hi AJ. Good to see you stopping by.

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They don't have to go off to war to be closed off.

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OK,
What I really want to know, is..... what did T&L order for diner?

SS


I think sometimes about all the pain in the world. I hope we can ease that here, even if only a little bit.
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(all dishes are vegetarian) mock chicken with sweet-sour sauce, sizzling rice soup, tofu salad, egg rolls, chow mein noodles. HP's fortune cookie said, "You are cheerful and well-liked." Mine said, "Faith is the answer to success." Oddly enough, I didn't even know success had a question!! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" />

t&l

P.S. I'm on the phone with Neaksis, and can't multi-task sufficiently to talk to her and tell you why we went out to dinner. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/blush.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/blush.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/blush.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/blush.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/blush.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/blush.gif" alt="" /> I'll be back later. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/crazy.gif" alt="" />

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I went out to lunch with a co-worker recently. We went to a pan-Asian restaurant. When we got to our fortune cookies, we got a good laugh.

I went back to the office and went into my supervisor's office - asked if I could talk with him. Very seriously, I told him that we had been out to lunch and that we now had information that led us to believe that our workload would drastically increase in the next little while. (We have been in a backlog situation for a year - many of us are working overtime weekly - something unusual for most state employees.) This information was something of which he might not be aware but I wanted to pass it on. He was greatly concerned.

The co-worker and I had matching fortunes. "Your business will increase by vast proportions."

He sat there confused by the revelation - then he got it - and laughed heartily.

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I'm awake at this ungodly hour because I'm being paid for it. What's YOUR excuse? I thought you worked sane hours in a clinic or something intelligent like that! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/confused.gif" alt="" />

t&l

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well its early evening over here <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

grumpy is home and I did the hug and cuddle thing and he did just about fall over. No matter, he's disoriented so now is the time to get him to pay the credit card account and power bill <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/pfft.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/pfft.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/pfft.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/pfft.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/pfft.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/pfft.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/pfft.gif" alt="" />

Love birds are a twittering merrily, well one is <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" /> I'll let you guess who she is.

AND the big news is that whats his name - travelling soldier- is due back any time soon so GD will be so so happy and I'll have ANOTHER pair of love birds to throw the cold water of reality over <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smirk.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smirk.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smirk.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smirk.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smirk.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smirk.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smirk.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smirk.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smirk.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smirk.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smirk.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smirk.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smirk.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smirk.gif" alt="" />
He'll be way up in Darwin first but on home soil at least.

I dont think there is any way they will wait 7 years until she has completed medicene so I'm thinking wedding bells and church in a year or so if not sooner - <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" />

Oh My Goodness - I'm going to have to go lay down - it just ocurred to me - GREAT GRAND CHILDREN <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/confused.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/confused.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/confused.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/confused.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/confused.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/confused.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/confused.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/confused.gif" alt="" />
I'm too young, AW is too young to be a grand mother - someone send for smelling salts, no chocolate, lots of it <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/crazy.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/crazy.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/crazy.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/crazy.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/crazy.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/crazy.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/crazy.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/crazy.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/crazy.gif" alt="" />


Life may feel as if you are constantly getting kicked on a daily basis, living is about picking yourself up each day and going on and on and on regardless.

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Some Parents Are Just a Tad Odd

<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" /><img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" /><img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" />

t&l

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Courtesy of Lady Clueless.....



A GOOD PUN IS ITS OWN RE-WORD



A pessimist's blood type is always b-negative.

A Freudian slip is when you say one thing but mean your mother.

Shotgun wedding: A case of wife or death.

I used to work in a blanket factory, but it folded.

Corduroy pillows are making headlines.

Sea captains don't like crew cuts.

A successful diet is the triumph of mind over platter.

Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.

Without geometry, life is pointless.

A man's home is his castle, in a manor of speaking.

Dijon vu -- same mustard as before.

When two egotists meet, it's an I for an I.

What's the definition of a will? (Come on, it's a dead giveaway!)

In democracy your vote counts. In feudalism, your count votes.

If you don't pay your exorcist, you get repossessed.

When a clock is hungry, it goes back four seconds.

The man who fell into an upholstery machine is fully recovered.

You feel stuck with your debt if you can't budge it.

Local Area Network in Australia: The LAN down under.

He often broke into song because he couldn't find the key.

Every calendar's days are numbered.

A lot of money is tainted. It t'aint yours and it t'aint mine.

A boiled egg in the morning is hard to beat.

The short fortuneteller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large.

Those who jump off a Paris bridge are in Seine.

Bakers trade bread recipes on a knead-to-know basis.

Acupuncture is a jab well done.

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