I got pregnant with my first daughter while still in High School...she wasn't planned of course. I had a very rough time during my 36 hour labor and ended up having an emergency c-section.

When she was around 4 years old my H and I decided that we would try to have another child. I got pregnant about 3 weeks later and only 9 weeks into my pregnancy I miscarried.

I went through a very rough time with the miscarriage because we were so looking forward to having another little one.

2 years later I found out that I was pregnant again and of course was very very nervous because of the previous miscarriage. This one was also not planned.

When our middle daughter was 9 months old I found out that I was pregnant yet again. This one also not planned. I went through a terrible bout of depression during my pregnancy with her and I wasn't stable health wise either, which landed me in the hospital numorous times before her birth.

My H and I had endless discussions on whether or not one of us should be permanantly "fixed". We decided that I would get my tubes tied and 6 weeks after our third daughter was born, I had my procedure.

Our youngest daughter is now 7 years old and I cannot believe that our oldest is going to be 15 years old and going into High School for the next school year. The time goes by so fast.

Now...onto my question.

For those women that have had their tubes tied and their youngest child is older and more mature and less dependant on you.....do you ever feel depressed that you don't have the option to have another child?

I know that I could have another if I wanted to spend thousands of dollars....but it's not even really that I want another child....more the fact that I can't get pregnant naturally if I were to want another child.

I've been told that the feelings I'm having are normal.

I'm just wondering if any other women have exerienced this?

Sometimes I feel like I've lost a part of myself.

Oh Miss Priss, I do know what you mean. We have four gorgeous children, waaay more than the norm for our circle but oh how I GRIEVED when I knew there weren't going to be anymore. Four is alot, they are two years apart and I work my tail off but they are SO worth it. I know that most likely there will be no more but still....part of me dreams. Maybe I always will.

My 13 year old DD wants a baby sister and brought up the idea of foster care. I'm telling you that for a minute there I was tempted! I know that it's not the same but there is that "mother heart" inside I guess that is always looking for ways to nurture.

I know that now that my "little" one is 8, I miss the baby part of him, he's growing up and changing into a bigger boy. Maybe that's part of it, when there are toddlers and kindergartners, the workload keeps our minds off of baby dreams. I don't know. I do totally feel what you are saying so no, you are not alone.

Enjoy the "babies" you have Miss Priss, it's good medicine. I keep looking at my 15 year old (PITA that he is!) and thinking that I have just got to cherish the time I have left with him. It went by sooo fast and he's going to be out from under our wings before we know it. Acck, I'm getting teary just thinking about it. Blessings to you and your "mother's heart" Miss Priss. {{hugs}} KB

I would like to say that men often have this regret also.

FWW and I both wanted several children. We agreed to wait a couple years until she established herself in her career. Then we had DS. We both agreed we would have another when he was 2 or so. I didn’t want to wait so long but she felt overwhelmed with DS and career at first.

So, when DS was 2 ½ we were ready to start on another. Enter OM, unbeknownst to me. FWW suddenly kept putting it off. She even went back on the pill without my knowledge. I heard every excuse in the book about why she changed her mind or why she was just not ready yet after all. Of course, now I know it really was the A.

I can still have children but her A lasted a decade. Now it’s too late.

I cry about this loss sometimes when I am alone.

I have two beautiful children, one almost 5 and one 3.5 I alwasy said I only wanted two, and sadly due to major medical issues left from the delivery of my first, I had pelvic reconstruction and a hysterectomy last June.

I am sad knowing that there will never be another little one again. I knew that i only wanted two children and got a boy and a girl, but sometimes I wonder. Before it was my choice to just have two, now it's not my choice - now it's a reality.

It's tough to accept. Early in recovery, before H went through this tough spot, he kept talking about how he loved when I was pregnant and how sometimes he wishes I could have another baby with him, and it was soo hard to hear as I thought I had put those feelings to rest.

-ds