Does it work if you view it as waging war against the WS Handbook?

I am w/ Bob in this one Pep. I absolutly agree w/ you "An Affair as a declaration of WAR" but we can't wage it. It is declaration only, BS has to do everything like preparing for the war but could never go into it.

-Find out thy enemy (OP) .. snoop, gather intelligent such that BS could make the right decision at the right time.
-Strengthen defenses in M ... plan A
-Call on allies to put pressure .... exposures of A

When those measures don't bring WS back into M, nothing BS could do but go into plan B ... stay in the fox hole. Until BS or WS signs a declaration to end the war ... Divorce (A is no longer A) or NC w/ OP (end A).

Just bables along ... RH <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/blush.gif" alt="" />

Coming out of hiding to disagree with Pep. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/ooo.gif" alt="" />

IMO. Of course the "enemies" are WS and OP.The Infidelity/affair is like the bomb that was dropped but the perpetrators made the decision to hurt people.They are the true enemies in my mind,the very real threat,by choices,to my marriage and family.To not place the blame squarely where it belongs is to free them of their responsibilities,their choices,cause and effect.

An A is a declaration of war on my marriage,my family,my values,everything but *someone* had to initiate it and they are WH and homewrecker.They make calculated choices of selfishness and sole survival regardless of the marriage(lying,sneaking around,betrayal,avoidance,etc) and cause pain.We try to "win" the war by talking to the enemy diplomatically,having our plans in place,using our "weapons" at our disposal(MB,books,knowledge,counseling,Ad's to cope,etc,etc).Doesn't always work though.

I liken it to the altered quote: "What if someone gave a war and nobody came?" to "What if someone wanted to cheat and nobody agreed?"

Oooh I am sooo confoozed. What are we disagreeing with? Seems like most here see the A as a 'declaration of war' of sorts. The WS and OPs are the causes which bring the war to our doorstep? Think so. Other than that the A war has been going on in different households in different neigborhoods for centuries.

So the war has hit our homes. There are now casualties laying about. Some are getting up to take care of themselves and move forward (with plans A/B or on their own), others just lie there waiting t/b buried and still others are lifeless. The lack of life is not in the M but in the person.

I don't see disagreements just different ways of expressing it.

IMHO,
L.

OctoberGirl !!!!

Yeah !!!

I love it when you disagree with me.

Nice to hear from you <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

Pep<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/cool.gif" alt="" />

I posted this once on someone's thread, and I think they thought I was nuts - but it is so similar to what the BS faces.

SS


The War Inevitable
by Patrick Henry
March 23, 1775

No man thinks more highly than I do of the patriotism, as well as abilities, of the very worthy gentlemen who have just addressed the House. But different men often see the same subject in different lights; and, therefore, I hope it will not be thought disrespectful to those gentlemen if, entertaining as I do opinions of a character very opposite to theirs, I shall speak forth my sentiments freely and without reserve.

This is no time for ceremony. The question before the House is one of awful moment to this country. For my own part, I consider it as nothing less than a question of freedom or slavery; and in proportion to the magnitude of the subject ought to be the freedom of the debate. It is only in this way that we can hope to arrive at truth, and fulfill the great responsibility which we hold to God and our country. Should I keep back my opinions at such a time, through fear of giving offense, I should consider myself as guilty of treason towards my country, and of an act of disloyalty toward the Majesty of Heaven, which I revere above all earthly kings.

Mr. President, it is natural to man to indulge in the illusions of hope. We are apt to shut our eyes against a painful truth, and listen to the song of that siren till she transforms us into beasts. Is this the part of wise men, engaged in a great and arduous struggle for liberty? Are we disposed to be of the number of those who, having eyes, see not, and, having ears, hear not, the things which so nearly concern their temporal salvation? For my part, whatever anguish of spirit it may cost, I am willing to know the whole truth; to know the worst, and to provide for it.

I have but one lamp by which my feet are guided, and that is the lamp of experience. I know of no way of judging of the future but by the past. And judging by the past, I wish to know what there has been in the conduct of the British ministry for the last ten years to justify those hopes with which gentlemen have been pleased to solace themselves and the House. Is it that insidious smile with which our petition has been lately received?

Trust it not, sir; it will prove a snare to your feet. Suffer not yourselves to be betrayed with a kiss. Ask yourselves how this gracious reception of our petition comports with those warlike preparations which cover our waters and darken our land.

Are fleets and armies necessary to a work of love and reconciliation? Have we shown ourselves so unwilling to be reconciled that force must be called in to win back our love?

Let us not deceive ourselves, sir. These are the implements of war and subjugation; the last arguments to which kings resort. I ask gentlemen, sir, what means this martial array, if its purpose be not to force us to submission? Can gentlemen assign any other possible motive for it? Has Great Britain any enemy, in this quarter of the world, to call for all this accumulation of navies and armies? No, sir, she has none. They are meant for us: they can be meant for no other.

They are sent over to bind and rivet upon us those chains which the British ministry have been so long forging. And what have we to oppose to them? Shall we try argument? Sir, we have been trying that for the last ten years.

Have we anything new to offer upon the subject? Nothing. We have held the subject up in every light of which it is capable; but it has been all in vain. Shall we resort to entreaty and humble supplication? What terms shall we find which have not been already exhausted? Let us not, I beseech you, sir, deceive ourselves.

Sir, we have done everything that could be done to avert the storm which is now coming on. We have petitioned; we have remonstrated; we have supplicated; we have prostrated ourselves before the throne, and have implored its interposition to arrest the tyrannical hands of the ministry and Parliament. Our petitions have been slighted; our remonstrances have produced additional violence and insult; our supplications have been disregarded; and we have been spurned, with contempt, from the foot of the throne!

In vain, after these things, may we indulge the fond hope of peace and reconciliation. There is no longer any room for hope.

If we wish to be free -- if we mean to preserve inviolate those inestimable privileges for which we have been so long contending -- if we mean not basely to abandon the noble struggle in which we have been so long engaged, and which we have pledged ourselves never to abandon until the glorious object of our contest shall be obtained -- we must fight! I repeat it, sir, we must fight!

An appeal to arms and to the God of hosts is all that is left us! They tell us, sir, that we are weak; unable to cope with so formidable an adversary. But when shall we be stronger? Will it be the next week, or the next year? Will it be when we are totally disarmed, and when a British guard shall be stationed in every house? Shall we gather strength but irresolution and inaction?

Shall we acquire the means of effectual resistance by lying supinely on our backs and hugging the delusive phantom of hope, until our enemies shall have bound us hand and foot? Sir, we are not weak if we make a proper use of those means which the God of nature hath placed in our power. The millions of people, armed in the holy cause of liberty, and in such a country as that which we possess, are invincible by any force which our enemy can send against us.

Besides, sir, we shall not fight our battles alone. There is a just God who presides over the destinies of nations, and who will raise up friends to fight our battles for us. The battle, sir, is not to the strong alone; it is to the vigilant, the active, the brave.


Besides, sir, we have no election. If we were base enough to desire it, it is now too late to retire from the contest. There is no retreat but in submission and slavery! Our chains are forged! Their clanking may be heard on the plains of Boston!

The war is inevitable -- and let it come! I repeat it, sir, let it come.

It is in vain, sir, to extenuate the matter. Gentlemen may cry, Peace, Peace -- but there is no peace. The war is actually begun! The next gale that sweeps from the north will bring to our ears the clash of resounding arms! Our brethren are already in the field! Why stand we here idle? What is it that gentlemen wish? What would they have? Is life so dear, or peace so sweet, as to be purchased at the price of chains and slavery? Forbid it, Almighty God!

I know not what course others may take but as for me: give me liberty or give me death.

Good one, SS. Especially can liken this part to BS' sitch:

..."Shall we acquire the means of effectual resistance by lying supinely on our backs and hugging the delusive phantom of hope, until our enemies shall have bound us hand and foot?"

There I was, ineffectually lying there,hugging hope, along with alot of other BS's. At least I had good company when I bothered to look around.

jls

Hi Pep! Good to hear from you~ <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/cool.gif" alt="" />

It's nice to read another of your thought provoking threads.You make us think outside the box which I love and you know I don't have a problem speaking my mind.lol.

SS,

I love the address that is made to his fellow countrymen.It is eloquent and full of integrity and just cause,much of what is lacking in todays society,I think.

O