Building Marriages That Last A Lifetime
| Tax-deductible Donation | Site Tour | Meet Dr. Harley | Basic Concepts | Q&A Columns | Articles | Guidance Forum

Welcome to the
Marriage Builders® Discussion Forum

This is a community where people come in search of marriage related support, answers, or encouragement. Also, information about the Marriage Builders principles can be found in the books available for sale in the Marriage Builders® Bookstore.
If you would like to join our guidance forum, please read the Announcement Forum for instructions, rules, & guidelines.
The members of this community are peers and not professionals. Professional coaching is available by clicking on the link titled Coaching Center at the top of this page.
We trust that you will find the Marriage Builders® Discussion Forum to be a helpful resource for you. We look forward to your participation.
Once you have reviewed all the FAQ, tech support and announcement information, if you still have problems that are not addressed, please e-mail the administrators at mbrestored@gmail.com
Forums Calendar Active Threads
Previous Thread
Next Thread
Print Thread
Will the trust and respect come back in time?
#1401956 06/10/05 01:22 PM
Joined: Jun 2005
Posts: 8
H
hurt_wife Offline OP
Junior Member
OP Offline
hurt_wife
Junior Member
H
Joined: Jun 2005
Posts: 8
After 8 months of lies from my H after an over seas affair I have absolutely no trust, respect, faith, for my H. He just told me a week ago about his A and it feels like nothing in our lives will ever be the same again. Will the trust come back? Will I have faith in him again? Will I respect him? I'm on an emotional roller coaster and want off! I want this whole thing to just go away and go on loving my H as I once did, with my whole heart.

HW
Re: Will the trust and respect come back in time?
hurt_wife #1401957 06/10/05 01:45 PM
Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 713
G
Godhelpme2 Offline
Member
Offline
Godhelpme2
Member
G
Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 713
Hurt, unfortunately these feelings will last for a long time. I'm 6 months out and still feel the same except for the faith part. After months of MC I'm able to have faith in God that I can use to put in my H. He appears to have made great changes in his life since d-day.

I still struggle to trust him and check his cell phone and pockets often. I still question him about everywhere he goes and have checked up to validate his story. A rough road yes. There is no easy way to get through this except divorce. If you don't want that keep working hard. I have faith that one day this will all pass.

Good luck!
2
Re: Will the trust and respect come back in time?
hurt_wife #1401958 06/10/05 03:02 PM
Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 1,408
O
oswald Offline
Member
Offline
oswald
Member
O
Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 1,408
HW,

I don’t come by often anymore and rarely post, but my son adopted me too so I thought I’d share.

My D-day was in Oct of 2000 so I’m a long long way from the pain you are now in yet I remember it (kind of).

I love, trust and cherish my W today as much if not more than before her A, so yes it does return. Unfortunately, it takes time and it won’t come from his words or your wishes, it will come from his actions. He will have to earn back the trust. You will have to learn to let him have that opportunity.

Try and look for positives to hang on to through this ordeal, he confessed, that says something about his character.

Read, read and read more on this site and in the books. Recovery can happen.

Hang in there,

P.S.
Godhelpme,
Nothing about divorce is easy, sometimes the grass just looks greener.

Oz

"The longest journey of any person is the journey inward." Author Unknown I'm a survivor and here is My Long Journey
Re: Will the trust and respect come back in time?
oswald #1401959 06/11/05 07:22 PM
Joined: Jun 2005
Posts: 8
H
hurt_wife Offline OP
Junior Member
OP Offline
hurt_wife
Junior Member
H
Joined: Jun 2005
Posts: 8
Thank you for your encouraging words. Because of my faith in God I am able to take the steps I need to take to face my H each day and with God's help I will get through this.
Today was a good day!

HW
Re: Will the trust and respect come back in time?
hurt_wife #1401960 06/15/05 07:23 PM
Joined: Jun 2005
Posts: 4
G
gybna Offline
Junior Member
Offline
gybna
Junior Member
G
Joined: Jun 2005
Posts: 4
I have known about my husbands emotional affair for the past 2 weeks. I am also going crazy. I check his cell phone, call his work, check his car. It is driving me crazy. I don't know how to stop all of this. I believe that we had problems before but I just can't get by the fact that he would talk and meet with another woman. I feel so low and I can't stand this feeling. I have to get better for my three small children. He seems to be paying me more attention and seems to be very sorry but I just can't trust him. I feel as if I am the only one in the world with this terrible pain!! Please any advise would be wonderful!!!

Moderated by  Fordude 

Link Copied to Clipboard
Forum Search
Who's Online Now
0 members (), 1,097 guests, and 63 robots.
Key: Admin, Global Mod, Mod
Newest Members
SadNewYorker, Jay Handlooms, GrenHeil, daveamec, janyline
71,836 Registered Users
Forum Rules · Mark All Read Contact Us · Forum Help · Marriage Builders
Building Marriages That Last A Lifetime
Feedback | Terms and Conditions | Privacy Policy | Contact Us | Site Map | Account
Copyright © 1995-2019, Marriage Builders®. All Rights Reserved.
Site Navigation
Powered by UBB.threads™ PHP Forum Software 7.7.5