Welcome to the
Marriage Builders® Discussion Forum

This is a community where people come in search of marriage related support, answers, or encouragement. Also, information about the Marriage Builders principles can be found in the books available for sale in the Marriage Builders® Bookstore.
If you would like to join our guidance forum, please read the Announcement Forum for instructions, rules, & guidelines.
The members of this community are peers and not professionals. Professional coaching is available by clicking on the link titled Coaching Center at the top of this page.
We trust that you will find the Marriage Builders® Discussion Forum to be a helpful resource for you. We look forward to your participation.
Once you have reviewed all the FAQ, tech support and announcement information, if you still have problems that are not addressed, please e-mail the administrators at mbrestored@gmail.com
Previous Thread
Next Thread
Print Thread
Page 5 of 6 1 2 3 4 5 6
Joined: Feb 2005
Posts: 811
S
Member
Member
S Offline
Joined: Feb 2005
Posts: 811
8-Ball Picture

Here's a link to Amazon for a picture.

Quote
RHM - I don't have a clue where to buy such things but do they make blow up boys?
Aislinn - I can feel you leaning towards the 'dark side' ...


Looks like your a "good girl". It's nice to see they still exist. I have a feeling I'm going to need to meet one since my WW is running to the dark side. Pretty scary! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/eek.gif" alt="" />


What doesn't kill us makes us stronger. Me 41 WS 39 DS 19, DS 9 DDay 2/25/05 Divorcing....
Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 27,069
B
Member
Member
B Offline
Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 27,069
Sleepless -

Maddy is drop-dead attractive, and she wears those leather pants. That is why I think she should hold out for something more her style.

Maddy -

Don't make the mistake of sleeping with someone that you would like for a friend. After that, if you don't want more, the friendship is gone. Have fun for awhile, and check out some others.

Joined: Mar 2000
Posts: 1,885
T
Member
Member
T Offline
Joined: Mar 2000
Posts: 1,885
Ok...for many of you who know my story...
The guy that I kissed asked me out for Sunday lunch and maybe a movie. I really do like him and would like to see him more often. How do I let him know that without seeming like I'm coming on too strong??????
Oh...an for an update on my DV.....I'm supposed to have mediation on Aug. 8th. Let's hope it will be over after that!!


Me 35
STBX 39
Dear son 9
Married...15 years (Jan. 20, 1990)
D-Day July 20, 2004.
Divorcing!

What goes around comes around

Sometimes we have to hold our head high, blink back the tears and say GOOD-BYE
Joined: Feb 2005
Posts: 1,080
P
Member
Member
P Offline
Joined: Feb 2005
Posts: 1,080
Quote
oh maddy think of the fun possibilities tho....if you have an elevator...elevator sex...going up?....have a pool?...pool sex...rub a dub dub maddy and bright eyes in a tub....oh and then there is roof top sex....I mean exciting....maybe he can pretend for a day he's your gardener...ok i've been watching too much desperate housewives and been away from my owm boyfriend too long..... @ _ @
Aaaagh, fingers in ears, eyes closed, lalalalalala!! Not thinking about this. Not thinking about this.


Me 40, STBXWH 43 Married 16 years D-day 01/25/05 Son 14, Daughter 10 Divorce almost final - I hope!
Joined: May 2004
Posts: 7,093
W
Member
Member
W Offline
Joined: May 2004
Posts: 7,093
Tree,

I posted a reply to you, but decided against it. Who am I to lecture you.

If you saw it already, disregard it okay?

Take it slow, that is all I am saying.

Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 1,399
A
Member
Member
A Offline
Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 1,399
MovingForward, yes, that's me. I changed my name when I went into Plan B because though I doubt my husband ever comes here, he knew I did and he would know the maddy name. I didn't want him to be reading my posts.

Sleepless. Yes, a successful plan A for *me*, but not with my H. My H saw the changes and like them. Then was able to explain away saying he wanted to work on things. He's in another country..we have not even seen each other since October.lol..yeah, I know the neighbor wouldn't want to just hang out. Too bad my husband didn't notice or doesn't care about what this guy is noticing. It *is* nice to be pursued. A very nice ego-stroke, if I may say so!

surviving in his wake..oh, you hush! Don't make it worse!!! No elevator, but there is a pool. And a hot tub. And a roof. And a shower. And the stairs...the balcony..the car..the beach...*fans herself*

Faithful Follower..good move. When my H did visit, you can be sure I took advantage of that opportunity!

believer, that was very nice of you to say <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" /> I don't necessarily want this guy as just a friend. If he didn't live in my apartment building, i might not be so hesitant..but since he *does* live here, I need to be careful not to get into a complicated situation. The last thing I want in my life right now is drama.

Tree, I think you need to move very slowly here. In some ways, my having very little contact with my h has been a blessing. While it made a recovery much less likely, it also saved me from more pain and allowed my love to die naturally. I'm not saying I don't love him, but I'm definitely not "in love" with him (gawds..did I just say that!?!?!?). Anyway, you've had contact with your H and cooky contact at that. You still have a lot of anger and confusion about his behavoir so please be careful.

Thing with all of this is...if some of ya didn't get it by now...I'm a VERY sexual person. It is very difficult for me not to be in an intimate relationship with someone. And yet while I joke about a fling, that's not really what I want. I want to be my very sexual, latex wearing-self with someone I love or at least am very close to. That takes time...And it sucks to have lost that...

Where's TT go...she's the one who started all this!!


~*~My Old Signature is too long~*~
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 820
T
tqt Offline
Member
Member
T Offline
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 820
Since the name of this thread is KILLING me <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/teary.gif" alt="" /> every time I see it,
I'll pay somebody $50 to change it to:

"I WILL get laid again, I WILL get laid again!" <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/crazy.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/crazy.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/crazy.gif" alt="" />

Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 2,885
T
Member
Member
T Offline
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 2,885
I don't like that horrible 8-ball thingy. It didn't give me any nice answers regarding me. Boo hoo.

Maddy - This is about ME, not you and your vinyl pants and your prospective toyboy. In the infamous words of Crystal Gayle, "Don't it make my blue eyes green".

Seriously, still cannot imagine being comfortable enough with a man again to 'let it all hang out'. But a girl can dream ...

Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 27,069
B
Member
Member
B Offline
Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 27,069
TT- Won't you change it to make love again? We all know we can go out tonight and get laid.

Joined: Feb 2005
Posts: 1,080
P
Member
Member
P Offline
Joined: Feb 2005
Posts: 1,080
Quote
Seriously, still cannot imagine being comfortable enough with a man again to 'let it all hang out'. But a girl can dream ...
Oh, TT, I have a very good imagination, LOL. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/tongue.gif" alt="" /> But I wonder if I'll still know how? <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/confused.gif" alt="" />


Me 40, STBXWH 43 Married 16 years D-day 01/25/05 Son 14, Daughter 10 Divorce almost final - I hope!
Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 1,399
A
Member
Member
A Offline
Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 1,399
believer is trying to get the $50.00. lol. but what you say is true. You can get sex any ol' time.

TT, you will find someone with whom you *do* feel comfortable with and don't even give it a 2nd thought.


~*~My Old Signature is too long~*~
Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 577
K
Member
Member
K Offline
Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 577
As soon as my WH left me, I donated every piece of sexy clothing I owned and used to wear for him as it was nauseating to think I was turning him on with this clothing while he was screwing OW. I have since invested in new sexy lingerie and clothes. For an entire year (ironically, exactly one year post d-day), no man was exposed to any of this beautiful clothing. It felt damn good to show off my Iron bod, gymnastics-like flexibility, and sexy clothing to this lucky man and I look forward to seeing where this road takes me.

LOL,

Muels


Me: 28 yo Faithful wife Him: 31 yo WH Married:6/17/01, together 5 yrs D-Day:5/22/04 His Affairs: w/coworker fall 03 and current with '03 HS grad he met while chatting via webcam online; they now live together 1/4 mile from me. WH admitted to missing me & not loving OW the same way he loved me 4/05. Divorce papers were filed 12/04 and I am having a hard time accepting it as I know we could weather this storm, rekindle our friendship, and move towards great things in love and in life.
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 543
H
Member
Member
H Offline
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 543
My exWH only wanted sex about twice a month, and that was with me initiating! This was long before his affair. Sooooooooooooo it's a bit easier going without it. But, it also seems like I've been going without it for a very long time!

He preferred oral sex, while I missed intercourse. I like the feeling of connectivity, closeness, etc with intercourse. (By the way the oral sex was not mutual!) Now part of this is what peeved me about his relationship with the OW. They obviously had intercourse because they conceived an OC!!!! He did say that he couldn't "perform" the first time she tried to seduce him. Golly gee!! Maybe at 47 years old the ex was a bit intimidated by this 21 year old expecting a good "performance" from him?? And of course he denies that his affair had anything to do with how it made him feel to have such a young thang take an interest in him. Yeah right! Then again, she was the same age as his oldest son....

Anyhow, I hunger for touch..sex...intimacy... Dang, it's not like you can get that anywhere else..from just anyone else...in the manner I want to experience it with a husband! "Independent" woman and all....I just can't manage to hug myself, kiss myself on the lips..or in my mouth..or on the back of my neck. I can't lay spooning, cuddling or back to back touching in bed with just myself. Self stimulation just doesn't carry the same energy and charge as a intimate, sexual relationship. Neither does "Toys-R-Us/Me"!!

Unfortunately I take an AD med that increases libido! Whoopee!! Nothing like adding a little insult to injury...

And....I'm 50 years old, so it's not like I'm high on the list of desireable women. Men my age tend to go for women in their early 40s, 30s...or younger. They just don't know what they're missing with a mature woman eager to share the benefits of her life "experiences"! (Well, that's what I try and tell myself! LOL )

It's nice to be able to come to this site and talk about this stuff with others who know exactly where you're coming from.......I think?? (As she works at slowing her breath and getting her hormones under control!)

Joined: Mar 2000
Posts: 1,885
T
Member
Member
T Offline
Joined: Mar 2000
Posts: 1,885
aislinn.....I understand what you are saying. I will take it very slow. It's been almost a year now since D-day. I have very little contact with my STBX. I've blocked him from sending me email and I too am not "in love" with him anymore. Him and the OW seem to be planning a long term future together. I still don't know how I will deal with her being in my son's life. I think I may have to take meds to deal with that.

Anyway....I too miss sex soooooooooooooo much! Well, not sex but making love to someone special. Will that ever happen again for me????

Last edited by TreeReich*; 06/14/05 09:01 PM.

Me 35
STBX 39
Dear son 9
Married...15 years (Jan. 20, 1990)
D-Day July 20, 2004.
Divorcing!

What goes around comes around

Sometimes we have to hold our head high, blink back the tears and say GOOD-BYE
Joined: Feb 2005
Posts: 1,080
P
Member
Member
P Offline
Joined: Feb 2005
Posts: 1,080
Quote
Anyhow, I hunger for touch..sex...intimacy... Dang, it's not like you can get that anywhere else..from just anyone else...in the manner I want to experience it with a husband! "Independent" woman and all....I just can't manage to hug myself, kiss myself on the lips..or in my mouth..or on the back of my neck. I can't lay spooning, cuddling or back to back touching in bed with just myself. Self stimulation just doesn't carry the same energy and charge as a intimate, sexual relationship. Neither does "Toys-R-Us/Me"!!
Gulp. I think this explains it very well, heartmending.

Muels, the night WH left (after we had SF <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/mad.gif" alt="" />) I had been wearing some very nice lingerie he had given me. I had to throw it in the trash. I couldn't stand to look at it, it made me physically ill. I would have burned it, but the kids would have noticed. I felt so dirty and used. I had never felt that way before.

I still have some nice lingerie, but I can't wear it around the house, the kids would die of embarrassment - and the dogs are not impressed, LOL. In the drawer it sits.


Me 40, STBXWH 43 Married 16 years D-day 01/25/05 Son 14, Daughter 10 Divorce almost final - I hope!
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 924
K
KA1 Offline
Member
Member
K Offline
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 924
pebbles...put it on...look good...take a pic...and send it to us idiots here


KA1 village mechanic
Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 1,593
S
Member
Member
S Offline
Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 1,593
Quote
surviving in his wake..oh, you hush! Don't make it worse!!! No elevator, but there is a pool. And a hot tub. And a roof. And a shower. And the stairs...the balcony..the car..the beach...*fans herself*


Thing with all of this is...if some of ya didn't get it by now...I'm a VERY sexual person. It is very difficult for me not to be in an intimate relationship with someone. And yet while I joke about a fling, that's not really what I want. I want to be my very sexual, latex wearing-self with someone I love or at least am very close to. That takes time...And it sucks to have lost that...

Where's TT go...she's the one who started all this!!

*evil grin* Muhahahahaha......i feel you on the sexual part sister...well i don't literally feel you cause I don't swing that way but you get my meaning.....we should start a where was the wildest place you've had sex thread. while the beach is great...there is a lot of snad...and it gets everywhere -_-.....i can't wait....less than a month and I get to see my man.... <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smirk.gif" alt="" />....yeah I know <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />....

Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 2,885
T
Member
Member
T Offline
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 2,885
SleeplessnSeatle - "You're not really a lingerie model are you?" No - a fitting model. Completely different and nowhere near as glamourous. Twice a year, a UK lingerie company come out to Hong Kong and 'size' all their bras before they go into production. I just happen to be a size 38F so I try them all on either at an office or at the factory. Boring but fun. I get to keep some of the bras and it pays quite well. But to put it into perspective, I total about 80 hours a year doing this. My real job is a teaching assistant. This is not a job about looking beautiful - just making sure the garment industry continues to thrive. You wouldn't believe the profit margins! TT

Last edited by tucktummy; 06/15/05 01:47 AM.
Joined: Sep 2004
Posts: 777
F
Member
Member
F Offline
Joined: Sep 2004
Posts: 777
You girls.

I am 38 - and got the 18 yr old hormones 20 years late. WW made love or had sex with me once in August. Once last year.

You ever put dry ice in a coke bottle with some water and cap it real tight?

Thats nothin-.........


foundareason
D: March 2006 (xw - multiple a's)

I have found a NEW REASON!!!!
A Treasure!!
Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 1,253
G
Member
Member
G Offline
Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 1,253
I can't sleep. While I was tossing and turning before coming down to the computer, this thread came to mind. I'm sure if I was to be *AHEM*ed, sleep would come a lot easier. Actually, sleep would be much easier if there was someone to wrap their arms around me and cuddle.

Being that lighthouse out on the rocky point, battered by waves is a lonely place to be.


Grapes are versatile. Grapes can be sour, sweet, sublime as wine and fabulous even when old and dried out.

Me: BS
XCH: Clueless
2-DS: Bigger than me
1-DD: Now also bigger than me!

5/6: Personally served CH with divorce papers
6/6: CH F? wants to time to see if M can be saved
7/6: FCH reenters our lives to work on marriage but secretly signs papers to start divorce...what's that about?
Mediation set for November
Final dissolution in January 2007.
2008 and beyond: Life goes on...
Page 5 of 6 1 2 3 4 5 6

Moderated by  Fordude 

Link Copied to Clipboard
Forum Search
Who's Online Now
0 members (), 301 guests, and 41 robots.
Key: Admin, Global Mod, Mod
Newest Members
Countfunkula, mollye14, Pansu, sakyt, George Mixflicke
72,372 Registered Users
Latest Posts
What happens if we both have developed aversions?
by Samuel Connely - 10/03/26 02:12 PM
Separated/Dating
by mark_foster - 09/20/26 04:14 PM
Separation
by elambush - 09/04/26 11:24 PM
beverage sizes in large office
by elambush - 09/04/26 11:22 PM
Forum Statistics
Forums67
Topics133,659
Posts2,323,617
Members72,372
Most Online9,682
May 13th, 2026
deneme bonusu
Building Marriages That Last A Lifetime
Copyright © 2025, Marriage Builders, Inc. All Rights Reserved.
Site Navigation
Powered by UBB.threads™ PHP Forum Software 8.0.0