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My H is having an affair with a miltary officer. I've been told that felony charges can be made against her.And that she can be transferred across the country and have her pay leveled off. Does anyone know that facts. Thank you.
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I should have said adulteress. Sorry
BW(me) DDay EA 4/05 DDay PA 6/05 In recovery
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Michele, I would cut and paste the entire post on the other board and start the thread over here. You will get alot of assistance.
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There are a few articles in the UCMJ that could cover that, but the most common is Article 134, Conduct unbecoming an officer.
She CAN be court-martialed for adultery, however, it doesn't normally happen unless there are extreme circumstances. More than likely, an Article 15 (non-judicial punishment) administered by her Commander is usually what happens.BUT you have to have PROOF.
If you have proof, simply present it to her Commanding Officer and he/she will happily take care if it. Even if you don't, but you KNOW the A occurred, DIRECTLY contacting her Commander will, more than likely, cool her adulterous jets, because she will at least get a career-threatening discussion from her CO.
Sorry to hear aobut it'
Hope that helps,
WNB
43yr old FWH who has rediscovered morality
Divorced: 03 February 2006
XW: My threads say it all
"Well, I guess if a person never quit when the going got tough, they wouldn't have anything to regret for the rest of their life..."
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I will read up on that. I don't know how to cut and paste the thread. I'll be glad to learn though. Thanks.
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Michele -
Welcome to marriagebuilders. You have come to the right place. To answer your question - Yes, the military will take action.
But before you go there, let's get your ducks in line. How long have you been married? Do you have children? Is the other woman married? Does she have children? If she is married, does her husband know?
Have you read up on Plan A here?
I know it is horrible at first, no sleep, losing weight, feeling like a zombie, low self-esteem, and anger. But it does get much better, I promise. Stick with us, and we will help you through this.
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It is against military law. Being she is an officer they will not take it lightly! More than likely it will stall or end her career. If you have proof you need to gather it. Find out who her chain of command is. That is all the people above her in ascending order. Under no circumstances are you to let H or OW know what proof you have. They will try to derail you. Confront your husband and her if you like. If they deny it and you have proof, tell them you have proof and they do not want you to take the next step. They will deny it though. You need to be prepared for that. Do not do this for revenge. That is not what this is about. You only want to do what is needed to stop the affair, PERIOD. Read up on plan A. Something is amiss and you need to find out what. Read. Read. Read. Under no circumstances are you to let them know what your plan is! Do you understand? Find her chain of command and get your proof in order. You may eventually need to send them all an email. Do not let them know about it. Harder for them to come up with a story.
Good Luck
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I've been married 17 years and have 2 kids 10 and 7. The OW is married to a military man in a different branch. They don't have kids. She is an officer LT Comm. I don't think her H knows. He's gone alot. He thinks the relationship is friendly. My H, the OW and her H fish together, along with a number of other people. They fish on my husband's boat. I have not had a chance to get the book yet. I will tomorrow. I'm sorry I posted on "just Found Out" board but I don't know how to paste and cut it here. They said to post over here with the military question. Sorry I don't mean to have multiple posts on the same subject. I'll stay where you all want me to.
BW(me) DDay EA 4/05 DDay PA 6/05 In recovery
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she will be courtmarshalled if you reveal her to jag ..her co might try to cover it up....i would threaten her with it but i dont think i would ruin someones life and imprison them by actually reporting her...the scare to do so should work....take this as gospel
KA1 village mechanic
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Do you have proof that can withstand legal scrutiny?
If so, you have to power to end the A (career-threatening to the LCDR OW), but those "in the fog" aren't always known to be the smartest people on the planet.
WNB
43yr old FWH who has rediscovered morality
Divorced: 03 February 2006
XW: My threads say it all
"Well, I guess if a person never quit when the going got tough, they wouldn't have anything to regret for the rest of their life..."
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i just read the other posts and by all means get your ducks in a row and do not divulge your evidence under any circumstance until you ARE FORCED to play your hand....send it to her CO, JAG and your congressman and senator....i have been a witness 2x to this and it isnt pretty....the threat to do so should work
KA1 village mechanic
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I agree...having been a spineless adulterer who got caught AND was the recipient of an Article 15 for my lack of character, the Fear of UCMJ action SHOULD stop the A.
If not, take your proof to her CO or the JAG.
43yr old FWH who has rediscovered morality
Divorced: 03 February 2006
XW: My threads say it all
"Well, I guess if a person never quit when the going got tough, they wouldn't have anything to regret for the rest of their life..."
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Boy I tell you how I feel now I don't know what I want to do. I'm not that kind of person to ruin someone's life but she has done it to me. I don't know. I think it's good leverage anyway. I guess it'll depend what happens when all the pi's evidence comes in and I confront them. If I get alot of anger back from my H and the OW, no telling what I might do. I'm trying to be in control though and think things out.
BW(me) DDay EA 4/05 DDay PA 6/05 In recovery
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Are you or your husband active duty?
43yr old FWH who has rediscovered morality
Divorced: 03 February 2006
XW: My threads say it all
"Well, I guess if a person never quit when the going got tough, they wouldn't have anything to regret for the rest of their life..."
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No both civilian. Never served.
BW(me) DDay EA 4/05 DDay PA 6/05 In recovery
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I have hired a pi as of Sunday. My H is fishing this weekend and may be spending the night over there, which he has done much more frequently lately. I'll be gone all next week so there is a good chance the pi will find them together. I have cell phone records of both H and OW. And I think they went on a trip together, but have no proof except credit card statement that looks like 2 tickets were purchased. I'm working on the evidence, but it's killing me to play dumb. This has got to get going. Thanks for all the help. Keep it coming.
BW(me) DDay EA 4/05 DDay PA 6/05 In recovery
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Does your husband and the OW know you know??
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you must reveal to several contacts....her CO, who will try to cover it up, JAG, and the elected officials....i am speaking from 1st hand knowledge
KA1 village mechanic
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Last month, after feeling things weren't right, I checked his email and low and behold here is a letter that to me said affair all over it. He said dear heart and thinking of you as always and he ended it with "talk to you later lovely lady". I confronted him and he said I took it out of context. There have been questions since, so he knows I think something is up. I went to the boat last weekend to surprise him on his birthday, he was supposed to be sleeping there. He was not there. That's when I went to a PI.
BW(me) DDay EA 4/05 DDay PA 6/05 In recovery
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If I disappear from this conversation suddenly it's because he should be home soon. I'll get back tomorrow if that should happen.
BW(me) DDay EA 4/05 DDay PA 6/05 In recovery
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