Many of you have followed my story and you all know that throughout all the ups and downs, I have continued to try to be a guidance counselor to him. What can I say, I can't truly let go and despite all the pain WH has caused me, I will always carry a love and care for him. I think this is especially true since he was my first love. Anyways, I asked him the very simple and blunt question, "where do you see yourself in 5 years." Below is the series of conversation we had this morning....thoughts???

His response:

This won't be the answer you are looking for, but I honestly don't know. I thought I had my life planned out before, but after all that has happened I have given up and trying to guess where I'll be in the future. I mean with the whole CVPD thing, I don't even know where I'll be in the next five weeks!

Sorry it isn't a great answer, but right now its the truth. OK, back to work, have a good day.

-WH

My 1st response:
I am assuming your vision is similar to what it was 5 years ago (think back to June 2000) only now you visualize yourself with a gun rather than a hose and coming home to OW rather than to me, the woman you fell in love with and married. Perhaps one day you'll be able to follow-through with the visions that have always come and gone during your life and actually make these visions a lifelong reality rather than a temporary fix because that, my friend, is what is going to allow your confidence to rise exponentially and ultimately bring you internal happiness. FYI, the power to reinstigate previous visions that once brought so many smiles to your face is possible yet now lay only in your hands.

Good luck with the CVPD vision,

Me

My 2nd response:

"After all that has happened I have given up."

That is not the man I fell in love with and have missed the past couple years. Yes, [censored] things happen in life, obstacles are thrown at us on a daily basis, BUT those who believe in themselves, carry a constant internal smile are those who ultimately have the strength to make things happen. I think you saw this quality when you first met me which is one reason you fell in love with me and also a big reason as to why you started pursuing an alternative career.

I have learned a lot about you over the past 6 years, WH, and know that when you initially develop a passion for something, you make things happen...you did this with running, firefighting, me, and now law enforcement. However, you can't let the flame die when life becomes tougher than anticipated or that vision of yours is a bit muted. You have to learn to dig for that internal strength that will allow you to persevere through the "tough" and make that passion a lifelong reality.

Well, you already know that I will continue to wish only the best for you (I have always been a very forgiving person) so I really do hope things pan out for you with the law enforcement. Just please stay strong and believe in yourself!!!

Back to the reality on my desk.

Love,

Me