|
|
Joined: Mar 2000
Posts: 1,885
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Mar 2000
Posts: 1,885 |
I just don't even know what to do anymore. I just went to pick my son up from summer camp and talked to my oldest neice. She told me that my MIL told her that my STBX is better without me because he would have never been able to finish school if he stayed married to me. So, I guess in her eyes I'm to blame because he had to work to support our family. I am so ANGRY!!! I truly don't know how to deal with all of this!
Just wanted to vent!!!!!
Me 35
STBX 39
Dear son 9
Married...15 years (Jan. 20, 1990)
D-Day July 20, 2004.
Divorcing!
What goes around comes around
Sometimes we have to hold our head high, blink back the tears and say GOOD-BYE
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 613
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 613 |
The apple doesn't fall far from the tree!!! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/confused.gif" alt="" />
You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you stop to look fear in the face. Challenges can be stepping stones or stumbling blocks. It’s just a matter of how you look at them. The purpose of life is to live it, to reach out eagerly and without fear for newer and richer experience
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 3,179
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 3,179 |
I just don't even know what to do anymore. I just went to pick my son up from summer camp and talked to my oldest neice. She told me that my MIL told her that my STBX is better without me because he would have never been able to finish school if he stayed married to me. So, I guess in her eyes I'm to blame because he had to work to support our family. I am so ANGRY!!! I truly don't know how to deal with all of this!
Just wanted to vent!!!!! Venting is good, but eventually all of this hate and negative energy for your heathen XH takes a toll on you. He is not worth the emotional energy this takes to deal with. Letting go of this stuff is all a part of the process. I hope your "prince" <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" /> of a son is doing well. LM
Some people just don't get it, they don't get it that they don't get it.
I had the right to remain silent.......but I didn't have the ability.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Mar 2000
Posts: 1,885
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Mar 2000
Posts: 1,885 |
Fishracer...
You are right. I'm finding that his whole family is wacko!!!!
lemonman...Yes, it is taking a toll on me. I just can't seem to let the anger go. I don't know why I feel the need to hold on to it. Is that normal????
My son is doing good. Thank you for asking! He's my angel. Thank God I have him!!!!! I would go through all of this again just to have him.
Me 35
STBX 39
Dear son 9
Married...15 years (Jan. 20, 1990)
D-Day July 20, 2004.
Divorcing!
What goes around comes around
Sometimes we have to hold our head high, blink back the tears and say GOOD-BYE
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 1,902
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 1,902 |
Tree,
There are some coupled emotions that we deal with. A yin and a yang if you wish.
Your bitterness over this is coupled to your forgiveness. It is like you have so much room in your heart, a fixed amount. It will be full of bitterness, or full of forgiveness, or even a mixture of the two. But you can't increase the one without decreasing the other. And therein lies the key.
If you want to get rid of your bitterness, there are two ways to go about it. REJECT the bitterness, or INCREASE the forgiveness.
Do it for YOURSELF, not the WH. Because that bitterness will eat you alive. Don't think you are letting him off, or anything like that. He will be let off only when he has a broken heart and contrite spirit. i.e. repentant.
Your forgiving is for YOU, not him.
NCWalker
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Sep 2004
Posts: 2,823
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Sep 2004
Posts: 2,823 |
(((((((((((Tree)))))))))))))
Oh honey....don't listen to what she says...blood is thicker than water.
Whatever helps her sleep through the night, eh?
-Caren
Always Look For Grace Given, Even in the midst of Grace Denied.
BS-Me 39
WH-37
Together 15 years
Married 12 years
7 kids total, His: SD20, SS18, Twin SS's 16.
Mine: DD22, DD15
Ours: DD12
Affair began Fall 04, Separated Fall 04,2 Failed Plan B attempts, False recovery of sorts Spring 05.......Still pluggin' away.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Feb 2005
Posts: 841
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Feb 2005
Posts: 841 |
Tree darling,
One word...
KickBoxing
I'm not telling you how or where to practice it...lol
RebornMan
ps-Be happy you no longer have to call these people in-laws....quick to stick the knife in, and lacking in common decency to know when to "SHUT UP"
"Who are you" said the Caterpillar
This was not an encouraging opening for a conversation.
Alice replied, rather shyly, "I--I hardly know, sir, just at present...At least I know who I WAS when I got up this morning, but I think I must have been changed several times since then."
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Mar 2004
Posts: 1,842
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Mar 2004
Posts: 1,842 |
Get into therapy...I was just as angry at one point that I NEVER thought I would get over it...I still get very angry at times...but lately I just let it roll...
Next time just say "Well, I am glad he now has the opportonity to finish up his degree"
|
|
|
|
0 members (),
1,261
guests, and
81
robots. |
|
Key:
Admin,
Global Mod,
Mod
|
|
|
Forums67
Topics133,625
Posts2,323,524
Members72,033
| |
Most Online6,102
Jul 3rd, 2025
|
|
|
|
