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Joined: May 2005
Posts: 15
Junior Member
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Junior Member
Joined: May 2005
Posts: 15 |
Found out 2 months ago husband was leading a "secret life". I discovered this affair by hacking into a secret email account. We are now separated and he says he has ended his affair of 5 years. We have been married 24 years and have three children 17,14,11. I thought we had a good marriage and have been blindsided by this. Both of us are in therapy. 5 years is a lot to forgive and I can never forget. He has neglected our family and been very comfortable with compulsive lying to me. What are your thoughts? Can a long term marriage recover from this?
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Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 27,069
Member
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Member
Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 27,069 |
Welcome Daisy - lots of long term marriages recover from this. I hope you have been reading here.
It is not good to be seperated. That increases the chance of divorce. But I know how you feel. I put WH out on D-day. The first thing needed is to be sure he has ended his affair.
Do you know if the OW is married?
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Joined: May 2005
Posts: 15
Junior Member
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Junior Member
Joined: May 2005
Posts: 15 |
Thank you for your response "believer". The OW was married for 28years and had a 15yr old son when this started. They have been separated for 2 years and now the husband of the OW is filing. My husband says the affair has ended and that that "door" is closed. But he has lied for so long I don't know how to begin to believe anything he says to me. I don't know how I could live with him and be civil around the children right now. He saw the OW 3 mornings at least each week and two evenings. I know a lot of sexually explicit detail from over 3000 emails. They spent a great deal of time together and that really hurts. How does one forgive with so many memories tarnished.
Daisy
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