well, she told me last night after being very nice to me for a number of days that that she met with an attorney that she liked and is going to get him/her a check and they'll start drafting something up. marshall will probably serve me next week or the week after...

when she told me this i said "OK, i don't want it but i can'/t do anything about it and I said no more about it. Didn't even ask who her attorney was. I think the fact that i didn't freak or fight with her about it or ask her not to do it threw her off balance. I don't know what will come oif this but i always will have some hope. Lots of hurt feelings but I know in my heart there is still love in there and the realtionship can be re-kindled. I can't wait forever and will move on with my life but want to leave a few avenues open. Mayhb e through this process she will have a change of heart - who knows?

do you ever hear stories of people proceeding with divorce and reconciling in the process and even after divorce? just curious...

funny thing is she suggested we go to dinner the evening before with the twow kids and was very nice - i guess i shouldn't bang my head analyzing all her behaviors...

what do you people think about this? THANKS....

My girlfriend is back with her ex-husband. In fact, they're having another baby and are happier than ever before.

I don't think you should read anything into your wife being "Nice." I was nice. I wanted to be nice. I think it was the worst thing I did to my STBX.

Because I was "nice" B. may have thought 1. I didn't really mean it when I said I was losing my love for him, 2. It was just a phase. Because I was nice, I think it masked the seriousness of the situation.

Keep in mind, my situation is a lot different from yours.

did your H eliminate and work on eliminating love busters? wht did you lose your love for him? help me understand.... thanks

[color:"blue"]DrBR,

Just continue to work on yourself. Any results may take months to achieve and it will only harm you to try and second guess what is going on. You can try to delay the divorce - figure out how.

V. [/color]

DrB, My STBX did nothing to eliminate LBs for years. The only time he attempted to change was this past January after we'd been separated for almost 2 years. By then, it was just too late for me.

I did the whole Plan A thing for over a year, working with Steve Harley. Plan A did work for me. My husband was much more attracted to me. However, since he wasn't following Plan A, or eliminating LBs, and he refused to change his behaviors, my feelings for him became increasingly negative. Plan A executed by someone only half in love is difficult. When Plan A doesn't generate a willingness to change in the other spouse, it has the effect of quickly draining hope.

I'm not going into specifics because my story bores me at this point, and it doesn't really matter.

BTW, I never invited my h to go out to dinner. That's unkind to you and to the children.

I'd suggest you talk to your lawyer. I'm sure there's a lot you can do to slow things down.