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Speaking from my past experience
when someone is really acting crazy <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/crazy.gif" alt="" />
do NOT engage
in fact
DISengage
so Tree*** ..... DISengage as much as possible
Much love and prayers
Pep <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/cool.gif" alt="" />
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FoxOr....well, I'm sure your Fifi was a sweetie!!! Actually, I call the OW "the Maggot". Her name is Magali so I think the Maggot is perfect for her. hee hee.
Pep....you are right! I have stopped all contact with him. This of course makes him crazy! I guess that's why he's trying to go through my parents now. My mom just called and said she will not respond to him....she said she doesn't have the time or energy to waste writing an idiot. LOL! I'm sure if none of us respond he will just get crazier. Oh well....I'll deal with it as it comes.
Me 35 STBX 39 Dear son 9 Married...15 years (Jan. 20, 1990) D-Day July 20, 2004. Divorcing! What goes around comes around
Sometimes we have to hold our head high, blink back the tears and say GOOD-BYE
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Your husband is as tiresome as the day is long...
he is the epitomy of any attention is better than NONE and when he gets none from you he goes after mumsy and the lot..
your husband reminds me of some victorian heroine.... over come with vapors and sucking down laudlum...
he is a victim of misunderstanding...
and since he bores me to tears...and I am much more interested in how you YOU my dear Tree are and your son......I leave you with some of my favorite authors quotes that remind me so of your hubby...
In the words of Oscar Wilder as they apply to your hubby...
Selfishness is not living as one wishes to live, it is asking others to live as one wishes to live.
Seriousness is the only refuge of the shallow.
Nothing makes one so vain as being told one is a sinner. Conscience makes egotists of us all.
There is only one thing in life worse than being talked about, and that is not being talked about.
I hope you are well...
I hope hubby continues to fight the ying and the yang each night when he lays his swelled head down to rest as he continues to wrestle the demons of his creation.... and yet when I put it that way...perhaps it truly is demons he wrestles for there is such evil in this world...and I wish him true clarity and peace....and the way to find a way home from his own creation....
ark^^
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FoxOr....well, I'm sure your Fifi was a sweetie!!! Actually, I call the OW "the Maggot". Her name is Magali so I think the Maggot is perfect for her. hee hee.
Pep....you are right! I have stopped all contact with him. This of course makes him crazy! I guess that's why he's trying to go through my parents now. My mom just called and said she will not respond to him....she said she doesn't have the time or energy to waste writing an idiot. LOL! I'm sure if none of us respond he will just get crazier. Oh well....I'll deal with it as it comes. Welp Tree, your mom, Pep and Cymanca are both right..... never argue with a fool. It's a waste of time and energy. Now if you family does not respond in full force it can still be to your benefit. See the reason for the e-mail was because your plan B is working. He can't seem to push your buttons. You keep moving the remote - must be that dern MB remote control thingy. LOL!!! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" /> Ok, so he tries your family. Well, your family can see right through the charade and now he will be wondering 'why doesn't anybody care about what this poor WS has to say? Doesn't anyone want to hear the babblings of a WS with self inflicted A pain?..... yada yada babble babble, etc.' Of course all this babble is probably going past the ears of the OP and since Fified isn't getting as much attention and you all are not giving them any ammo to bite on, then they are going to start WS/OP pouting. Oh yea, how nobody cares about them. You know what? They are right. Nobody should care for a WS & OP type personality. Stay dark my dear. Make 'em wonder. That causes LBs from afar. Good stuff that LB from afar tactic. You don't have to lift a finger but you can hear the targets being blasted. LOL!!! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" /> BTW, howz your little one doing? <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" /> take care, L.
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Thanks ark and Orchid!!!
I like the sayings ark! You are both right and me and my son are far more important than the idiot! We are doing good. We leave next Thursday to go visit my family for 2 weeks. My family gets a becah house for a whole week and we just relax and have fun. My parents are then taking us on a cruise at the end of July. I am really looking forward to getting away and having some fun with my family. They are very important to me and I love them to death!!!!! My STBX used to tell me that he wanted us to grow old together and be just like my parents. He looked up to them. I'm hoping by my parents not responding to his emails that he will realize what he's done and the impact of it. If not....oh well....I'll be moved on anyway.
Me 35 STBX 39 Dear son 9 Married...15 years (Jan. 20, 1990) D-Day July 20, 2004. Divorcing! What goes around comes around
Sometimes we have to hold our head high, blink back the tears and say GOOD-BYE
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I just got home from a movie with my friend and her husband. If you want to feel very lonely go out with a couple. Ugghhhh!!! I love both of them dearly but it made me feel so alone. I am so tired of being alone!!!!!! I can't help but keep hearing over and over again what my STBX told me... He said nobody would want to be with me because I'll be divorced and have a child. I knkow that's not true but it's in the back of my mind and makes me feel like I'll never find anyone. How do you fight the loneliness??????
Me 35 STBX 39 Dear son 9 Married...15 years (Jan. 20, 1990) D-Day July 20, 2004. Divorcing! What goes around comes around
Sometimes we have to hold our head high, blink back the tears and say GOOD-BYE
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I can't help but keep hearing over and over again what my STBX told me... He said nobody would want to be with me because I'll be divorced and have a child. When he told you this, which of his many spiritual models was he imitating? Jesus? Buddha? Confucious? I get a little confused.
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I just got home from a movie with my friend and her husband. If you want to feel very lonely go out with a couple. Ugghhhh!!! I love both of them dearly but it made me feel so alone. I identify with this! I invited some friends and their little son over for dinner last week, and it was one of the most depressing evenings ever. I just sat their feeling jealous of them because they were together and happy, and I really hated myself for feelin that way. Still, our kids had a good time together. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" /> Alph.
Me, BS 37
Him, WXH (Noddy) 40
DD13, DD6
Married 14th August 1993
D/Day 2nd April 05
Noddy left us 3rd April 05, lives with OW (Omelette) 28
Divorce final 6th July '06.
Time wounds all heels... - Groucho Marx
...except when it doesn't. - Graycloud
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NMDreams..... LOL...yeah...very true..I don't know what religion he was chanelling when he said that. I know it's not true but it makes ya feel bad.
Alphin...It is a depressing feeling watching all those families out there enjoying themselves while we're all going through so much pain.
Last edited by TreeReich*; 07/02/05 10:01 AM.
Me 35 STBX 39 Dear son 9 Married...15 years (Jan. 20, 1990) D-Day July 20, 2004. Divorcing! What goes around comes around
Sometimes we have to hold our head high, blink back the tears and say GOOD-BYE
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>I know it's not true but it makes ya feel bad.
Tree - there are PLENTY of good people out there...your wstbxh is sucking up and spewing evil.
You want I should tell my dad he shouldn't have wanted my mom and his "ready made" family b/c she came with baggage? How about my best girlfriend from hs who is now dating a dream boat....should I burst his bubble and tell him how he's not supposed to want her and her TWO SONS???
STBX is a tool AND and idiot.
You're gorgeous, smart and funny. You are a prize worthy of attaining. It's his sour grapes that he ruined his chance with you and he knows it...it eats at him like acid.
Now go out and buy some sparklers.
- Kimmy
I never had to take the Kobayashi Maru test until now. What do you think of my solution?O'hana means family, and family means nobody gets left behind or forgotten. My Story Recovered!
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I have some bad moments when I see families out doing things together. I see them bike riding, eating breakfast or at the pool. I feel bad for a few minutes until it sinks in that WH never wanted to participate in those things anyway. Last night, I took my DD to a movie. When we came out, the restaurant next to it had a band planning on the patio. A large part of me was wishing for some adult time and a person to have a beer with while we listened to the music. While DD is lovely company, she isn't adult and it didn't seem like the situation to take a kid into. It made me sad. However, when we got home, half the neighborhood was out in the street shooting off fireworks. I had a nice talk with my neighbors and that filled the void.
I think staying busy and positive is the key. When I start to feel sorry for myself, I remember that I'm leading the good and noble life. I will either have a better relationship with my WH if we ever make it to recovery or I'll move on to something else. And I have the knowledge that even my 87 year old widowed mother has a boyfriend. We BS feel lost and betrayed but there are other fish in the sea.
Grapes are versatile. Grapes can be sour, sweet, sublime as wine and fabulous even when old and dried out.
Me: BS XCH: Clueless 2-DS: Bigger than me 1-DD: Now also bigger than me!
5/6: Personally served CH with divorce papers 6/6: CH F? wants to time to see if M can be saved 7/6: FCH reenters our lives to work on marriage but secretly signs papers to start divorce...what's that about? Mediation set for November Final dissolution in January 2007. 2008 and beyond: Life goes on...
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Dealand-de...I agree that's it's ridiculous to think that nobody will want me because I'll be divorced and have a son. I know that it's my STBX way of trying to make me feel bad about myself and to think he's the only one. PFFFF.....I know now that there are plenty of fish in the sea and can't wait to meet them. :-)
grapegirl....I know what you mean. When me and my son our out and I see adults having dinner together and laughing...it makes me miss that so much. I'm trying very hard to keep busy. I was feeling really low earlier today then I went to the grocery store and bought stuff to make a good dinner for myself. As I was leaving I ran into a friend and her husband. They invited me over for dinner and drinks tonight. Funny thing is...the husband is my BIL's best friend. My STBX SIL will be at their house also. I'm looking forward to going because I haven't talked to her in a while and I'm very curious to her reaction and how she feels about everything. Apparently she's on the "out" with the in laws. No surprise there. Anyway.....I know there is always an open door waiting when another one shuts. We will all be fine...
Me 35 STBX 39 Dear son 9 Married...15 years (Jan. 20, 1990) D-Day July 20, 2004. Divorcing! What goes around comes around
Sometimes we have to hold our head high, blink back the tears and say GOOD-BYE
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> know there is always an open door waiting when another one shuts.
And if you don't find a door, that's what nitro is for.
I never had to take the Kobayashi Maru test until now. What do you think of my solution?O'hana means family, and family means nobody gets left behind or forgotten. My Story Recovered!
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Right on SISTER! Now when ever I say something like that everyone thinks I've gone physcho again. You always get away with it though Kimmy. Tree, toughen up. You and me kiddo, we got to toughen up. And if you don't find a door, that's what nitro is for. This, this is what I'm talking about. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />
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>You always get away with it though Kimmy.
That's because with my history, people take it for granted that I'm already a nutter.
I never had to take the Kobayashi Maru test until now. What do you think of my solution?O'hana means family, and family means nobody gets left behind or forgotten. My Story Recovered!
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Nitro... isn't that what TNT is??!! LOL  We are walking parallel paths sister, I am right here too!!! WE CAN DO THIS! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />
BW, 33 WH 36
Md 14.5 yrs
DD13, DS11, DD4
Tired of counting d-days, D proceeding 7/05
"Pride can break a man right down from iron.
Twist him 'round 'round and tatter up a soul
Handprint of God on the small of my back
my second chance, my second chance.
I'll bend a knee my friend, I'll bend a knee...
Lay It Down say it's all my fault, all my fault.
Say I believe, I believe lay it down.
This the hour of my healing, of my healing,
yeah my heart, my heart redeemed."
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Rock on TNT...we can. Each of us.
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HA HA...yeah for nitro~~
Well, I went to dinner with my BIL's friends. (I've known them for several years also). It was very interesting and I slept like a baby. I found out that my stbxSIL doesn't agree AT all with what My STBX is doing and neither does his brother. His brother is in Iraq right now but his wife told me that when he gets back he plans to blast his brother for what he's done. His brother went through this same stuff with his first wife. I also found out that the OW has met most of the family and that my STBX told some of the family members that he won't tell the OW he loves her until we are divorced. ???? WTF???? Apparently the OW is very possesive and it annoys my STBX. LOL.....excuse me while I laugh my head off for a minute...LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Also found out she doesn't want children. Hmmmm.....and I want my son around a woman who isn't interested in kids? All I know is it sounds to me like paradise isn't so great!!! I think it's wonderful! He deserves whatever he gets. Just had to share that what goes around comes around. Hee hee~~~
Me 35 STBX 39 Dear son 9 Married...15 years (Jan. 20, 1990) D-Day July 20, 2004. Divorcing! What goes around comes around
Sometimes we have to hold our head high, blink back the tears and say GOOD-BYE
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You didn't really think all was well in paradise did you?
Just the letters he sent to you were enough to scream "my life sucks and I'm going to take it out on you".
Sweet! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />
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You're right! Don't know why but I'm in a good mood today. LOL... :-)
Me 35 STBX 39 Dear son 9 Married...15 years (Jan. 20, 1990) D-Day July 20, 2004. Divorcing! What goes around comes around
Sometimes we have to hold our head high, blink back the tears and say GOOD-BYE
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