I posted many months ago. Almost 7 to be exact. My wife was going to leave me. She met this wonderful guy who made her happy. Luck me he lived across the street. After 2 weeks she was ready to dump me. Actually I pushed up her time table because I knew something was not right and point blank asked her. She admitted to a 'friendship' not an affair. It took many weeks before she would accept it as the emotional affair that it was.

That should have been the end of the story. Trouble was that she had given him a stuffed bear tht I had given her. I wanted it back. She contacted him and he pulled her into his arms and kissed her. Affair if off and running again after a month of nothing. Finally a few days ago I catch them red handed and it exposed a level of lying and deception that I would never have believed possible. She was good. I mean really good. Cover stories, back ups, the whole nine yards.

As you might have guessed it jumped from an emotional affair to a full fledged sexual one. Soon after getting back together. She stayed the night once and woke up with him doing something inapporpriate between her legs. But she stayed and eventually it happened.

Just for back ground. We had pre-marital sex in college and she has always held that against me. For 17 years! He forced himself on her but that was different...

Here we are a few months later with me none the wiser until I came upon them. I personally think she wanted to get caught. She was being torn appart inside by lying all the time.

Lucky man that I am I get to keep her not because I won. but because he dumped her. She has taken resposiblity for it and has pledged herself to make our marriage work now.

This after almost 7 months of me putting my heart and soul into trying to rebuild our marriage. I guess it take two people putting effort into it.

I may sound bitter but at this point I am happy that she even decided to stay. I don't think I have to worry about recontact since he dumped her for his other 3 girl friends. She finally saw that she was just one of many. She heard the phone calls saw the letters but couldn't believe he would be like that to her. Well she was taken to the cleaners and didn't get much out of it except a broken marriage and 4 messed up kids. Oh yes and a whole lot of guilt. I have forgiven her. As far as I can. She is having problems forgiving herself. Maybe that isn't so bad right now. A little guilt can be a good lesson.

Lesson here is. That say they broke it off... never believe them. They become masters of deception.

Zanthor, you guys in MC? I would highly suggest it. It is over with this man, but do you know what led to it? Please get some professional help for your marriage.

Good luck!
2

Zanthor, been thru same with WH. Get into counseling and BE NOSY. Don't assume that it is not happening again. I have spyware on WH's pc and other ways of finding out. Remember that this is an addiction for her.