|
Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 10,107
Member
|
OP
Member
Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 10,107 |
Went to lunch with Squid at Nandos. She had a hairdo and her nails painted this morning, and felt and looked great.
Had a lovely lunch.
She became pensive and I said " Baby, a penny for your thoughts".
She said " I don't now how you can love me when I have been such a silly slut".
I replied " Me neither, but I DO love you, and you haven't been that 'silly slut' for a long time now. Its time to stop hating yourself. Only me and OM GF on earth have a right to hate you: I don't, and we'll never hear from her again, if we're blessed".
Squid broke down in tears.
"I am SO SO SORRY for what I did. I regret every minute. If I had a time machine I would cut my own heart out before I did that again. You're so lovely and completely didn't deserve that. I will never forgive myself. Baby, I am SO SORRY. I was SO STUPID to think that scumbag offered me ANYTHING... * sob * "
Tears. In Nando's which isn't that cool.
I just held her.
We finished out wine and came home.
I am sorry she cried, and was sad. I don't want her sad but her words unlocked a chain around my heart !
Wonderful progress. Some of you know ho long I have waited for a heartfelt 'sorry'. This was it.
I could be a bit tearful myself if I thought about it. But big English blokes don't do that sort of thing of course. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />
MB Alumni
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 8,344
Member
|
Member
Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 8,344 |
I never had to take the Kobayashi Maru test until now. What do you think of my solution?O'hana means family, and family means nobody gets left behind or forgotten. My Story Recovered!
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 416
Member
|
Member
Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 416 |
(((( BP )))) So glad the weight has finally come off for you. Enjoy the light feeling and the day.
About the tears - I think you can cry plenty on the inside, good cries and bad, without shedding one tear.
Enjoy your peace.
Carnation
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 11,539
Member
|
Member
Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 11,539 |
I am sorry she cried, and was sad. I don't want her sad but her words unlocked a chain around my heart ! Oh Johnboy, I am soooo happy for you. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" /> Bob, I have a feeling things will just start getting even better between you and Squid now. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />
Faith
me: FWW/BS 52 H: FWH/BS 49 DS 30 DD 21 DS 15 OCDS 8
|
|
|
|
Joined: Feb 2005
Posts: 136
Member
|
Member
Joined: Feb 2005
Posts: 136 |
Now watch they are going to have SF tonight. hehehehe. But ya I'm happy for you and squid you guys have come along way. Best of luck to you guys for the future.
|
|
|
|
Joined: Mar 2003
Posts: 2,023
Member
|
Member
Joined: Mar 2003
Posts: 2,023 |
So happy that she finally really showed you she 'got it'. Happy for you and Squid. Lots of hope for you two to have a long happy rest of your marriage together...as an intact family.
God answers prayers. Prayers and patience.
Last edited by Trix; 07/05/05 08:57 AM.
Married 1976 Me:BS Him:FWS MB Weekend March 2003 2 S's: '77 & '80, 1 D: '82
|
|
|
|
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 1,177
Member
|
Member
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 1,177 |
Always figured you'd get it mate...just a matter of time and reflection. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/cool.gif" alt="" />
W 38ys H 39 yrs DS 2 yrs DD 21 yrs DS 20 yrs M nearly 21 yrs WHO DARES WIN
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jun 2005
Posts: 33
Member
|
Member
Joined: Jun 2005
Posts: 33 |
b0b
fantastic, great to hear.
FreeAllAngels
Me 40
WW 38 (NC since 18 June 2005)
SS9, DS4, DD2
D/Day 24 April 2005
EA/PA 1/05 to 4/05
Both working at relationship
Been here before with exWife, and will not be here again!
|
|
|
|
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 515
Member
|
Member
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 515 |
I'm so happy for your both! It must have been the best words ever spoken to you; especially because you have waited for so long. God bless you both!!!
FWW (me)34 BS 36 EA lasted 3 months First D-Day: 3/7/04 Second D-Day with total truth: 4/13/04 NC established: 4/14/04 In recovery and doing wonderful! The light shines through the darkenss; and the darkness can never extinguish it.
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 2,204
Member
|
Member
Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 2,204 |
Aww Bob - that is wonderful news.
|
|
|
|
Joined: Mar 2000
Posts: 1,885
Member
|
Member
Joined: Mar 2000
Posts: 1,885 |
Bob.....that is WONDERFUL!!!!! I know that must have made you feel so good. I can't even imagine! I don't know that I will ever get a heartfelt sorry for all the pain I've been through. Maybe one day it will come and then I can finally move on. I'm so happy for you!!!!! HUGS!!! T~
Me 35 STBX 39 Dear son 9 Married...15 years (Jan. 20, 1990) D-Day July 20, 2004. Divorcing! What goes around comes around
Sometimes we have to hold our head high, blink back the tears and say GOOD-BYE
|
|
|
|
Joined: May 2005
Posts: 1,724
Member
|
Member
Joined: May 2005
Posts: 1,724 |
b0b - that's great news.
I wonder if this is what she's been thinking about these past few days - the reason she's been withdrawn?
Very happy for you. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />
Alph.
Me, BS 37
Him, WXH (Noddy) 40
DD13, DD6
Married 14th August 1993
D/Day 2nd April 05
Noddy left us 3rd April 05, lives with OW (Omelette) 28
Divorce final 6th July '06.
Time wounds all heels... - Groucho Marx
...except when it doesn't. - Graycloud
|
|
|
|
Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 35,996
Member
|
Member
Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 35,996 |
<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />
see that?
she touched your wound .... ain't that cool !
Pep
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 10,107
Member
|
OP
Member
Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 10,107 |
Pep ( and all)
I can hardly believe it. A heartfelt apology has been my final shibboleth for so long as you long timers know.
I have had this wound bound up for so long now, and its been healing slowly with every extra step Squid took towards repairing the damage she did.
This today has made a huge difference to me. HUGE.
I suspected through her actions for months that Squid was sorry and regretted her affair, now I know its true. Unequivocally.
And this from the woman who for the longest time averred that her A was 'for her' and "she didnt feel guilty when she banged him because it was love".
Take heart, BS friends, your WS heart can change even if it takes a year.
Take heart also FWS of goodwill : you CAN get over your obsession with OP and love your BS again.
Thank you God. Another prayer answered in YOUR time not mine.
MB Alumni
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 11,539
Member
|
Member
Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 11,539 |
Thank you God. Another prayer answered in YOUR time not mine. AMEN!!! All in His time.
Faith
me: FWW/BS 52 H: FWH/BS 49 DS 30 DD 21 DS 15 OCDS 8
|
|
|
|
Joined: Mar 2000
Posts: 1,885
Member
|
Member
Joined: Mar 2000
Posts: 1,885 |
I think that is the key Bob....It was in God's time!!!! I remember your painful posts in the past...I'm so happy things are different now for you. :-)
Me 35 STBX 39 Dear son 9 Married...15 years (Jan. 20, 1990) D-Day July 20, 2004. Divorcing! What goes around comes around
Sometimes we have to hold our head high, blink back the tears and say GOOD-BYE
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jun 2002
Posts: 1,717
Member
|
Member
Joined: Jun 2002
Posts: 1,717 |
Tears. In Nando's which isn't that cool. This statement is what's not cool. This is something you've been waiting a long time for. She had her epiphany in a public place and felt the need to share it with you...immediately. She didn't let shame or embarrassment stop her. I think that's cool.
ba109
|
|
|
|
Joined: May 2002
Posts: 9,015
Member
|
Member
Joined: May 2002
Posts: 9,015 |
Hey Bob! A handshake for a brother who has waited on the Lord!
Others may not understand, may even think you nuts from time to time, but I'm grinning for you as only another brother BS can!!!! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />
Thank you Lord!!!
|
|
|
|
Joined: Feb 2005
Posts: 1,632
Member
|
Member
Joined: Feb 2005
Posts: 1,632 |
I think I posted something like this to you about 2 mos. ago. I told you it would come, and at a time YOU least expected it. Remember Bob, in God's timetable!!!!!! Great news!!!!! Blessings to the both of you. Jerry
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 10,107
Member
|
OP
Member
Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 10,107 |
Hey Bob! A handshake for a brother who has waited on the Lord!
Others may not understand, may even think you nuts from time to time, but I'm grinning for you as only another brother BS can!!!! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />
Thank you Lord!!! FH Friend Gimble advised me a while back that "if God revealed our true natures to ourselves all at once, and his intentions for us at once it might kill us or send us crazy, and those affected by us". Instead he moves all creation to meet His plan for us. for EACH of us. Wow. Humbling really. Thank you Lord. * ba , I agree it was cool even in nandos! Just that it was a seemingky incongruous location fir such a momentous event. * Jerry, yes you did tell me that. I pray God blesses you similarly mate. * tree - I dunno what to say to you darl'. We cried on each others shoulkders some over the months, that a fact....Squid wasn't as big a jerk as your WH I guess. I'm no more worthy or anything than you. I pray you find happiness in whatever way God plans for you.
MB Alumni
|
|
|
1 members (SadNewYorker),
106
guests, and
52
robots. |
Key:
Admin,
Global Mod,
Mod
|
|
|
|