I am not as familiar with many of you on this board as I am with those on Recovery. But I have read many posts over here, and know that there are some very knowledgeable people hanging out on this board <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

I have started a thread on Recovery for a friend of mine who I recently found out was involved in an A. I have spent a decent amount of time speaking with her, and know that she desperately wants to do the right thing. She just hasn't had the knowledge, the tools, or the strength to do it yet.

If you find the time, and have the heart, please post to her. She is a good person, and I would like more than anything to see her (and her M) heal from all this.

Here is a link to her thread:
Zocam's Thread

Thank you all for your help.

BUMP for Zocam

she won't like what she hears ... but hopefully she will listen anyway ... have YOU considered telling her husband the truth yourself?

This might turn out to be a test of YOUR integrity !!!! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/eek.gif" alt="" />

touche!

I have thought about it. Will I? Probably not. She is in a situation where the A will most likely be exposed even if she does not tell him. They have some overlapping of friends.

My goal right now, is to help her end the A. In my eyes, that is first priority.

When I first came to MB, I had not confessed to my H - but after about 3 days of posting and reading the responses, I chose to confess. IMVHO, she deserves the same chance to learn and then make a decision.

Thanks for posting Pep.....she is listening btw....

L.I.T., hopefully she does take JL's advice and tell her H; it is her only hope. But I would point out that telling her H would probably effectively end - or hasten the end - of the affair real quick. That would be to her benefit. As her friend, I would certainly keep that option in my back pocket in case she doesn't do the right thing and tell her H.

<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" /> I agree ... she deserves a chance!

Bump in case anyone else would be willing to work with Zocam.

Thanks you guys!

BTW L.I.T, where is she?

TMCM

Hey TMCM,

I was at her house for a few hours last night. She has a sick baby, and only has dial up at the house, so she did not log on during the afternoon hours.

I'm not certain whether she will be back or not. At the moment, she is steadfast that she will not tell her H. And she isn't sure what she can get from the board if all anyone is going to do is try to get her to tell her H.

A fair amount of discussion ensued after, and she knows my views on the situation. However, regardless of her decision to tell or not tell her H, she needs to stay out of the A. For multiple reasons (some very serious ones outside of hurting herself and the family)......I am hoping she will feel comfortable enough to post those reasons here - and also for support with NC, and to try to understand her A. But again, it will be up to her if she will post again.

Yesterday was her first day of NC......

I really hope she chooses to come back to the board and can find some sort of help.

Thanks for posting to her. I know she is truly thinking about all this.