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Joined: Jun 2005
Posts: 474
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Joined: Jun 2005
Posts: 474 |
Well, we are about to go away for our 2 week family vacation tomorrow! I am going to try my best to be upbeat and have fun, fun, fun. show WH that our family is where he is supposed to be!
My situation is I told WH I knew about OW and I talked he said nothing. I sent OW an email telling her he is married with 3 kids who need a father. She sent it to him, he got mad at me. Then apologized for being mad. He came home yesterday and was actually nice to me. He will not talk about anything yet.
I think we need to have a discussion about all of this. What do you all think?
Any advice before I leave???
Zorro94
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Joined: Dec 2004
Posts: 1,978
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Joined: Dec 2004
Posts: 1,978 |
Lost,
You ARE a family, so its ok to be one on vacation. Before we left I told WH I wanted nothing that reminded me of OW to go on vacation with us. No computers, no phone calls, if a song came on the radio I was turning it off. In return I would not bring her up or any relationship talk about our M. We would go on vacation and see if we still liked eachother and deal with the other stuff when we got home. I did have wonderful time and we created lots of family memories...powerful tools. Relax, be yourself, enjoy! I hope you have a great trip. I haven't been to MN yet, I have a cousin that lives there, it sounds beautiful.
aka-confused42
BS-45 me
WH-42
DS-14 & DD-12
together 21 yrs, married 18.5yrs
"I love you but not IN love with you" speech 6/3/04
D-Day 2/25/05; WH moved out 3/15/05 & back too soon 3/22/05...He left again 5/8/06
5/25/06 Plan B.....NC letter 6/18/06
Recovery finally began Jan 2007
We are IN love again!!!Sept 2007
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Joined: Jun 2005
Posts: 474
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Joined: Jun 2005
Posts: 474 |
Thanks Confused! I wish I had more time to sort out and deal with my feelings and emotions before going but I don't. The finding out and confrontation happened just at the beginning of this week so my emotions are still all over the place. But I am going to try what you said. Tell him I want no reminders, no blackberry so he can email and no phone calls. In return I will not relationship talk unless he is ready.
I'm nervous, but excited! Thanks again!
Zorro94
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Joined: Nov 2002
Posts: 1,108
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Joined: Nov 2002
Posts: 1,108 |
Sounds like a plan to me, Lost. Go with it. And have a great time.
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Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 3,179
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Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 3,179 |
My advice to you as much as you don't want to hear it is ..................NO SF with this man. He cannot and should not be trusted with the keys to the rest of your life.
YOU can Plan A and do all of that strategizing all you want, and blame OW, etc.. etc... etc.., but do not under any circumstances have SF with the waywards. It is not worth the risk. Get him and yourself checked out by an MD (I can give you a referral if needed).
This is my main reason for staying on the boards, so I apologize in advance if my tone is extra sour tonight.
SM
Some people just don't get it, they don't get it that they don't get it.
I had the right to remain silent.......but I didn't have the ability.
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