It's been 3 1/2 years since I found out my W had a coulpe of A's. To this day I think there is more to be told. We are stil togeather but my love has never been the same. She still thinks that I should put all of this in the past which I can most of the time. The problem I have is at age 35 she still goes out to night clubs where 24 & 25 year olds hang out. Not as much as she did in the past but she still does and she knows I am unhappy with this. She comes home at 6,7 and sometime 8am from the night clubs. Yesterday she came home 2 hours late from work and did not answer her cell when I called. She said she left it in her purse and didn't hear the ring. I am to the point where I still love her but I want to seperate but don't know how to go about it and also feel very guilty about leaving my kids behind. I strongly feel kids need a father in the household and I feel like I am only thinking of myself if I leave. I know this will hurt my kids but I am not happy and my wife won't listen. The only thing she has told me is that I want to seperate do it before she gets to old. I juggle this around in my head everyday. We are on track to by a house in a few months but at the sametime I have looked for an apartment for me. I am really lost and confused don't know what to do!!!! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/crazy.gif" alt="" />

nphaaze, I don't think you can realistically expect to change her so you have to accept her how she is and make decisions based on that. If you can accept a wife who acts like an alley cat, then you have your gal. If not, maybe its time to cut your losses. But, you have to understand that you aren't going to change her. And her behavior is profoundly destructive and disrespectful to you.

Yes, divorce will hurt your kids, but so will a mother who cats around all night. I wouldn't suggest leaving your kids with her, though, if you decide to seperate.

Have you been tested for STDs?