I have had it. i can't take another day like this it is to painful to know that my h has choosen ow over his family. making plans to leave the area. he is constantly blaming me and saying hurtful things. can't take it much longer i hurts to badly.i need to find a place to heal and i can't do it with him in my face all the time. he cares nothing for me or the children. got to get my ducks in a row to leave. i hope he is happy once i leave then i won't have his mess rubbed in my face all the time. i sometimes feel like my grief will swallow me up and i can't keep fighting it off and remain sane. he wants out then let him go. but i won't stand by and be the fool any longer. the only way i will return is as his wife. and i'll be [email]da@#$%[/email] if he will have his cake and eat it to. let him deal with all the crap that i have had to do. maybe 2 weeks and i am out of here. and i can't stand by and let him force his slut on my children they can't fight for themselves but i can. and i will to. going on monday to see about storage for my stuff and will start moving boxes there. he won't find out until it is all done. really don't care at this point need a fresh start some where else.

IT IS TIME. I AM HAPPY YOU HAVE MADE THIS DECISION. NOW REMEMBER THERE IS NO "MODIFYING" THE PLAN B..........DO IT BY THE BOOK.

ANd yes, I am yelling for effect...

Sourmale

I have been working plan a for 6 weeks and he shows me no respect as his wife or the mother of his children. i will see a att. this week and get my ducks in a row then disappear.after the conversation i had with my dd11 i can't stand by and let him continue to make my child feel used over the last year she has felt like his slave while i was at work he made her do the housework and dishes and fold laundry while he sat on his butt and talked on the phone. well he made his bed he can lie in it i will get as far away from him as i legally can. i will not tolerate her exposing my children to low moral standards. i can't take it. but before i leave i think i will finish off exposure with e-mailing everyone in his address book what he has done what do you all think

Well, I can certainly understand where you are coming from with wanting to do this. It will probably have NO positive EFFECT on your chances of successful recovery some day and is probably just all spite....BUT, I will be honest and admit I stil might have done this if I were in your shoes.

You have a lot of anger and it is ALL 100% justifiable. I hope that you some day find a way to channel all of that incredibly negative energy you have againt your WH. The guy is a scum bag sack of $hit in MY OPINION, but the anger you have for him can actually consume you if you are not careful. I have been where you are so I identify with what you feel now. I can feel all of the anger and hurt you have now. I am not gonna be a hypocrite and tell you NOT to feel this way, but the fact that you do feel this way just shows you HOW important it is for you to go into PLan B. YOu are stuck with your wayward in one way or another for the rest of your life so any way you slice it (kids), so you HAVE to try and preserve any semblance of feeling for him NOW.

Hating this sack of dung for the rest of your life will NOT cure you...it will actually kill you.

Sour.... <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

(((( Joanna )))) I am certainly no expert in any of this stuff, but if it makes you feel a little bit better - my WH has chosen the OW over me too.

It hurts and it is devasting, but so has my life been for the last year or so with WH in it. It only has to get better. We must hold our heads up high and walk away with a little bit of decency. Lord knows the infidels have none. They deserve each other, hon.

As I have always found to be true --- what goes around, comes around. We will be fine. There is no need to seek revenge on your WS, that will all be taken care of by someone who has a whole lot more power than you or me. Watch and see !!!

Take care, you are not alone.

Carnation

This is the problem i don't hate him I love him as much as the day I married him. that is why it is so devestating for me. And i realise that if i do not go to plan b it will destroy me. i have to save myself from any more damage. eventually i know that if this continued i would not be able to get back up so it is better if i get out now while i have the will to do it then to allow him to beat me down any more it is cruel and heartless the way he is treating me and i do not deserve this treatment. i was a good wife and supported him in everything he did and this is the thanks i get for being faithful and believing in him.

I am soo sorry you are in pain. But, you can't stay and keep being treated badly like you have been. (yikes, look whos talking)

One thing that helps me when people treat me mean or act like total jerks - I tell myself that happy people do not act that way and that person is just not happy. It does make me feel a little bit better.

You must think about yourself and your children. Who else is going to ???

Take care. I wish there was more that I could do for you. But my situation is a real mess too.

Carnation

I agree with LemonMan on this. It certainly is an appealing idea that probably isn't a good idea in the long run. It is actually one that I am considering myself. (I even have OWs address book, so I could really go all out on this). It is so tempting...

However,I would advise you to think this through very carefully before doing this.

Generally I've held myself back from doing it by knowing that, as Carnation pointed out, OW will get her just "reward" when the time comes.

Sometimes it does make me feel good to think about doing it. And when I do that, it also makes me feel good to know that deep down I don't really want to do spiteful things to other people, even if they really do deserve it.

In the end, I know I will feel good about myself by taking the high road.

ewon