Wow -

I don't know what's happened this last week; but letting go of this marriage has been the best thing ever - no longer being shackled and used by my WW has completely changed my outlook on things.

The most amazing change - MY BLOOD PRESSURE HAS DROPPED. For a year and a half I had unexplained blood pressure and was put on medicine; I was 18 when they put me on the medicine; I'm 6'2" 175lbs so I am hardly overweight - my body index is a healthy number. Well - today after ending things; I went out with some friends and felt great, not only about life but about myself. We went out; I didn't even think about this marriage or about the pain - we went out and had fun doing things like jumping off 50 foot bridges lol.

We stopped by the drug store, and for the first time in over a year, my blood pressure was stablized at a normal level and a healthy heart rate - WOW!

I feel completely refreshed being away from this crap - I feel like a new man again - the same man I was before I got married. I still wish my W would have tried to work things out; I did love her...and although I don't feel like it anymore; I know there is still some love in my heart for her. I guess now its just time to move on and focus on God and my schooling.

Will the pain of the divorce come back? Its the weirdest thing; I don't feel any remorse about leaving - I don't miss my wife...and quite frankly, after everything that she did over the last two months and after reading her responses; I don't even care anymore. Is this a healthy part of the healing process or is it something more?

I hope you are all having a great night - tonight was the best night that I've had in nearly a year. Not because I wasn't with my wife; the nights I spent with my wife when she was being faithful meant the world to me; but this was a different kind of happiness. I had forgotten what it felt like being happy.

Take care guys...

-Aaron

I've let everything go as well and it still is a roller coaster. Sometimes you will feel so positive about your situation, and then the next day you will want you WW back. This week has been more depressing then most, for some reason. But it takes time, and you must realize that. I've been more outgoing then ever and meeting people which is always a plus. Enrolling in school will help you take your mind off things and hopefully get your life back on track. This has definitely been a long summer...Take care comrade.