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I received my divorce papers today (not the Final Judgement, but just the papers that need to be filed). Well, I guess I got them yesterday, but I didn't check the mail. At least he respected my wishes to not be served. I expected this. Knew it was coming. But it still sucks. It is very difficult not to call him crying (not even tempted to do it, but it's still difficult) begging him to try ONE MORE TIME. But who am I kidding one MORE time...we didn't even try ONE time! Plus, my mom's not home <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/teary.gif" alt="" />
~*~My Old Signature is too long~*~
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I'm so sorry...yes, it sucks! and it is so hard NOT to call...just keep typing here...
I remember the night I came home from court two weeks ago...All I wanted to do was call HIM...but I didnt'...The longer I waited, the easier it was to get over it!
Hang in there!
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So sorry to hear this. But you KNOW that you have done everything possible to save your marriage. Hold your head high. You have no regrets - he will someday have MANY. Now it's truly time to put YOU first.
I eat animals.
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MF4M (sorry I used the other initials in your post earlier! Was not thinking!). Thank you. Weird--sad, but glad it's almost over. I am not tempted to call him in the least...but there's part of my brain insisting there's something I can do about all this...lol.
starz, I agree. Sometimes, though, it's hard that my son and I have to suffer the consequences of his actions. He will suffer from them someday, and hopefully by then I won't care...but it'd be nice to see him suffering a little bit now, ya know? Right now he's just happy as a clam...ick.
While doing the MB thing was hard at times--would've been easier to just walk away--I'm glad I did it. While it didn't work for my marriage, it *did* have an effect on him so I did get a tiny taste of the rewards of MB. I know that one day I'll get the full reward :-)
~*~My Old Signature is too long~*~
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Yes, it is awful and I am so sorry you are going through this. But, I got through it. I don't know how but I am still here.
Don't call him and ask him to try again (I did that and they don't want to hear it).
I agree with Starz. Start putting yourself first. What really helped me was reading books on affairs, relationships, self-help, grief management. I read so many books it was mind boggling. Also, force yourself to do things. Walk, visit friends, take up a hobby, anything to keep you moving.
Always remember, we are all here for you.
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{{{maddy}}} I know this must be a hard time for you.
Faith
me: FWW/BS 52 H: FWH/BS 49
DS 30
DD 21
DS 15
OCDS 8
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{{{maddy}}}
These documents are not a death warrant, even though they feel like it. Yep... my WS trying just once, that would have been okay, even if only out of a sense of honor and compassion. Sadly, honor and compassion got tossed out the window long ago.
And of course people like you and me have, at least, one kind of "prize": a clean conscience.
GC
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MB Alumni
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Thank you all so very much for your kind words. Don't worry about me calling...I'm truly not tempted.
Ya know what gets me at this point? And I will admit to this being a bit petty and just childish.
It's not even that I want him back. But the whole thing was just....so damned unfair. I never had a chance. Just very unfair, both for me and my son.
I'll get over *that*, I'm sure. But I do prefer the anger over the hurt!
~*~My Old Signature is too long~*~
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It's not even that I want him back. But the whole thing was just....so damned unfair. I never had a chance. Just very unfair, both for me and my son. I'm just lurking and haven't posted before for you. But this struck me. It's not immature at all. It's more than unfair.... It's not right. Since your husband obviously displayed no honor, you know now after all of the MB work.... that you'll be better off. That's why you do it. You can now show your son how it's supposed to be. You can teach him honor even if his father can't. Sleepless
What doesn't kill us makes us stronger.
Me 41
WS 39
DS 19, DS 9
DDay 2/25/05
Divorcing....
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Maddy - I'll join you for a pity party! So sorry that, against all your hopes, it has come to this. You are truly his loss. TT
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(((Maddy))) So sorry, dear. I went and filed against my X only to find out that she filed the day before, so I knew it was over but still when I read what she filed, I remember the emotion all too well. FHL04 is out here with me through part of next week but i told her about your post and she sends her thoughts & prayers your way. She also said she'd get ahold of you when she gets back next week. Anywho, if you need someone to talk to, e-mail me and I'll get you the phone number that she can be reached at wbill70@yahoo.comHugs, Thoughts, & Prayers
Hugz, Thoughtz, & Prayerz
Bill
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