*sigh* ok all...had a meeting with STBXH today. -_-. I think the man needs some serious mental help....I heard tons of how he's in debt up to his eyeballs...20,000 dollars now aparantly...because he has had to "borrow" money (the man makes 3000-4000 monthly)...and get this.... half of it is mine...it's "shared"... <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" />

I kept my mouth shut and just thought sure keep thinking that....i just went up and made you rack up expenses when we SEPERATED...dork...major major dork.

Then he tells me that my having my own private bank account is hiding assets from him... <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" />...can we say control freak....he doesn't like it when he can't see what I am up to.

i simply told him ih I am sorry you feel that way. But I am doing what I need to in order to survive and raise DS.

So he was left with that...later he called me to let me know about something...I thanked him for the discussion we had ealier and even tho he thinks nothing was accomplished I did think we did in fact get somethings out that needed to be discussed. while still stand offish he agreed to an extent. I then mentioned to him I had an Idea regarding ds's visitation.

I said we could both get a copy of the calendar and mark off our events for that month and then we could schedule visitations and we would both have a copy. He then said can't we do it by email...-_-. I said it wouldn't work for me as I needed a schedule to put up...he said he looses papers....and he didn't want to schedule MY way...and blew up at me.....

ok this is a man who walked out on us. wouldn't at first set a schedule to see his son because he was too busy. Then he managed to schedule time one day a week after work for 2 hours. Then he sooo wanted ow to meet DS...I made him wait till they had been together 7 months. I went with DS as I am his only constant and major support person... STBXH didn't like that he said I was chaperoning him...I said it's not ALWAYS about you...Then my new job required I work one weekend day a week so he got more time with him and he STILL complains....now watching DS takes up his time...he has to miss church with OW 2 weekend days a month (and he cries about it)....

he was with DS for a week while I was out of town for a training seminar...he didn't even take DS over to his moms as was planned...he had DS around OW...... now that DS knows these people...as long as he is not harming DS or putting him at risk I am willing to work out a schedule so he can see him MORE....I have been telling him this for awhile...but I keep getting reasons why he can't....he doesn't have the time....he doesn't want to do it my way....etc...arrrgh...no matter what i do or how nice I am I can't win...I just want to be able to be free to live my life and not be tied to him....I have a whole future waiting for me...I have plans to go to school to become a veterinarian...to make a more stable life for my son...to give him a home and food and clothes on his back for sure.

He said he will let us go.....but he wants to make sure I am not taking DS away....he even suggested I leave DS with him and go to college.... <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/eek.gif" alt="" /> WTF??? what crack is he smoking...I have fought THIS hard for DS...does he think I will just roll over and say ok.

wow this thread was read 56 times.....*hugs all people who read it* you guys rock...I feel the love.

Keep hanging in there for your son, SIHS.

Hugs and prayers, SIHS.

slh

SIHW, WS really behave like alien pod people. Treereich's STBXSH wears his [censored] as a hat too. So does brownhair's. So does SIS's WW so does Sparrow, Grayclouds STBXW so does...

Theres a theme here. WS are crazy when the consequence of their infidelity is divorce. All the more reason for BS to protect their assets for their future and family as soon as they are able.

All blessings

Hey SIHW!

Long time no see....

Like bob said listing all the whacko EX's, mine is too.

You are making the same mistake I made, trying to reason with the unreasonable.

Making sense out of the senseless...you'll go mad.

I to tried to be easy and open, whenever just let me know visitation. It doesn't work because no matter if they say they want the kids 4 days a week and you say OK, and you agree to the specific days...the EX will find an excuse to not hold up their end. Then it will be YOUR fault for pushing the kids on them.

If they say 1 day and you agree, they will say you are withholding their child...

See? You can't win...after 20 months I finally told mine that we go by the schedule the court set up, you get a copy of standard visitation in Cali SIHW, and enforce those limits now! Better for you, better for kids, and this is one of the consequences of his cheating..if he really wanted unfettered access to his kid...he'd be home with him.

Please, been through it, don't do it..you will NEVER be reasonable enough, NEVER be flexible enough.

NEVER!!!!

Other than him wearing an [censored]-hat...hows everything else going?

REBORNMAN! *hugs* heya dude!
well I have decided to go back to school....I decided to become a veterinarian...since it's the one field I am good at....but it involves me moving out of state.....lets see how stbsxh will be about it. But I am looking forward to a clean slate and a chance to BE somebody and make something out of my life. A chance to show my son people can go to college and earn a good place in the world...no matter what mistakes they have made in the past.

I look good I am slowly inching toward my final weight goal now...finally broke my plateu I was stuck at. I earn alot of cat calls these days... hehe...i feel like a sexy goddess *strikes a pose*...but that aside even tho it's nice to be noticed....I have a wonderful boyfriend I love dearly. I learned from my past mistakes....and that road will never be travelled again. But hopefully if things run smoothly I should be moving back east next april at the earliest. I will however be swallowing my pride and be moving home with mom and dad to save up money -_-. Don't get me wrong I love my parents....I just get along with them better if I don't live with them. I am gonna start taking some of my pre requisit courses while I am here and I am gonna transfer over the credits when I leave. Joy...chemistry.....I heard it's hard. But I will do my best to get an A and make you all proud.