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I've posted my story elsewhere. Anyway, in Plan A. She's left so she could have some time to sort things out. She is going to call tonight. What do you do if WW asks for a D?
Me 43 BH
MT 43 WW
Married 20 years, No Kids, 2 Difficult Cats
D-day July, 2005
4.5 False Recoveries
Me - recovered
The M - recovered
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Joined: Jul 2005
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stay calm and pray. You don't know what is going to happen. I'm sorry I'm not much help at all, having still swimming in the mess here.
pretty confused
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Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985 Likes: 1
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rprynne, if she wants a divorce, tell her that you are not interested in divorce talk, only in working on your marriage. Do not agree to any "settlement" or anything relating to divorce. Got it? Don't agree to quit exposing her or to quit causing her trouble. And don't let her bait you into a fight.
Don't take anything she says to heart. Just realize that you are dealing with a person who is very confused and in the throes of an addictive affair. She might say that she chooses the OM, but that will change several times over the next few months so don't take it to heart. She will go back and forth, back and forth as her screwed up emotions change from day to day.
Just stick to the plan I gave you:
1. FACT FIND
2. EXPOSE
3. Don't lovebust
That is your mission, no matter what she says. Got it? You are a man with a mission, don't let anything distract you from saving your marriage, ok?
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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Rprynne ~ Ditto what Melodylane said.
Also, for some silly reason, most WSes are just too darn caught up in having an affair to bother doing the footwork of filing for divorce.
So while she MAY actually file, its likely she won't if she's following along the typical WS path.
~ Pain is a given, misery is optional ~
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Also, for some silly reason, most WSes are just too darn caught up in having an affair to bother doing the footwork of filing for divorce. LOL..............that has me chuckling out loud, because it is 100% right on... <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> SM
Some people just don't get it, they don't get it that they don't get it.
I had the right to remain silent.......but I didn't have the ability.
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Thanks everyone for your advice. It really helped me through a rough night. Not as bad a talk as I thought, not as good as I hoped. Taking it day by day.
Me 43 BH
MT 43 WW
Married 20 years, No Kids, 2 Difficult Cats
D-day July, 2005
4.5 False Recoveries
Me - recovered
The M - recovered
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Posts: 27,069
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Its in my other post, but basically a little more truth about the A, mad about exposure, but she still needs some time to think. So no conclusions. Sorry for the fire drill, just never liked riding the roller coaster
Me 43 BH
MT 43 WW
Married 20 years, No Kids, 2 Difficult Cats
D-day July, 2005
4.5 False Recoveries
Me - recovered
The M - recovered
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