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Is it possible for me to start recovering after the A?
#1446564 08/07/05 05:00 PM
Joined: Jul 2005
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Is it possible to start recovering? I have exposed the A to the OW fiance (sp?) and my H's mom and my parents. He is in Iraq due back in the states on or before christmas. I am just wondering if it is possiblef or me to start healing after this even though he is not here. I feel alot better as the days go by I have been sort of depressed lately but there are alot of other things in my life contributing to my depressed feelings too. I am just taking one day at a time and it gets easier for me. So is it possible for me to start my recovery?
Re: Is it possible for me to start recovering after the A?
ronaile #1446565 08/07/05 05:18 PM
Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 27,069
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Actually it is very possible for you to personally recover right now. It is hard to work on the marriage with your husband being gone. But you can start working on you right away.

Figure out what kind of things raise your self-esteem (which is probably in the toilet). I got busy exercising, cleaning, organizing, did the yard, detailed the car, threw myself into work, learned how to speak Spanish, did volunteer work, started by own business. You get the point.

Chances are that taking care of yourself now will help your marriage later. Remember, it is usually the BS that has to take the lead in recovery.
Re: Is it possible for me to start recovering after the A?
believer #1446566 08/07/05 08:43 PM
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I thought it was sort of possible i just wasnt sure. I have gotten myself into things when i get home. I plan on participating in the FRG meetings more and taking my kids places. I have alot of stuff that i can do on and around my house. House work will be one. We are getting new housing so i will have to start packing things up. I def. get your point. I know that it will take me getting the revcovery started. I really cant wait until he is home so we can both start together. He has done alot already to prove himself. I love him and he knows it. Right now my real focus is on him coming home safe to my children and i and then when he is home getting into MC. Thank you for your response!

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