I am very confused, I noticed a new cell phone # making calls and receiving them, 2 calls were longer 6min and 13 min.. all the rest are 1 min... So I called the cell phone and the v-mail sounded like the woman ny H had an affair with. So I confronted him on this and he was very stand offish about it on the phone we had it out big time... But I am still not convinved that they didn't meet up , he said no he just wanted to talk to someone I asked why her and he said I really don't know. Do I believe that. not really. I told him that is it no more, he is to not dial the number or receive calls and he said ok.... I want to call her and confront her .... should I . It all leads back to Sex... I guess it was freake (sp) with her and I not wild enough for him? is what I am thinking... I don't want to check his cell phone all the time but now after what I found I am back to square 1... Not sure what to do or how to approach this. I am so ready to just give up. I have an appoint ment with a counsler on the 24... I can't wait to go. I am scared and so hurt... what to do.... Please help.

Has he agreed to send her a no contact letter? That is absolutely necessary.

Hi JustHurt,

I'm sure you may have heard all this before, so I hope I'm not being too repetitious.

If he feels he had the "need" to talk to her, I think you might be back to square one, especially for him to answer you with "I really don't know" on why he did it.

He may still be addicted to the feeling she gives him, not about his feelings for her. He needs to get to MC with you asap, hopefully the 24th is soon enough.

I've read so many books on the "A" subject over the years (my H has had two mini PA's) and one dealt with men's emotions at the times they felt they needed to "step" outside their marriages...it was labeled HALT. These were common factors that make it harder for a man to stay pure in his thought life...Hungry, Angry, Lonely, Tired. What's going on in his life right now?