I have another question, but so I edited it. I'm thinking I need to stick to one thread but i'm having technical trouble with it.

***this is what has happened so far***

It was as far as I know a EA by text msg. perhaps one sided.

there has not been any NC letter, no agreement to end NC, and we seem to be in neutral. No openness, no honesty, and denial and defensiveness.

I think I should assume that there is still C. But how do I go on dealing with it when I don't have proof either way? He seems also to be stubborn and on a power trip, like i should just accept this and go on with my life.

Can somebody smack me or something?

****

the Ow and I have had some contact. She contacted me and seemed to need my help ending it. So I bought it hook line and sinker because she has what I want. PROOF.

anyway...only a few conversations and one question I asked her was if she and he had ever been alone together. She said she didn't didn't know, she didn't remember. I told her I didn't believe her and she got nasty with me. So I ended the conversaton, a few days later I apologized for the question. I guess I didn't have to apologize, I just recognized within myself its inappropriate and prob. harmful to me.

anyway, so i exchange a few msg. with her pretty benign...and the last msg. last night was where in the area is good place for cheap cute clothes?

today, she sends me a msg. saying "Oh 2 funny" i ask her what? she says "you think we're friends when you accuse me of having sex with your husband. I want an apology" I sent her a msg. back saying 'i aplogized a few days ago. don't you think you should apologize for having an inappropriate relationship with my husband?"

so far no response. I did not accuse her of having sex with my H, i asked her if they had spent time alone together. Is this evidence of a PA?

but on the other hand...

I'm thinking, I don't want to have anything to do with this. its not going to help me one bit, especially if I'm always going to be insecure that they are still having C and wondering if she is telling me the truth.

Should I send a NC letter and can I warn her of her disasterous choices and how she has harmed my family?

thanks...

bump

3 minutes later, my WH sent me a text msg. of course I'm thinking they are still talking. This is a big problem....I feel I am going nuts.