All of my FWW close friends have had A, or their spouses did.

A good friend just had his W of 10 years leave him for OM. She left and said he could have the house, property, assets and full custody of their 3 and 8 year old children.

My FWW two best friend have cheated on their H. One confessed and the other is keeping it quite from her H.

Another good friend cheated on his W, she found out and they are working at recovery and doing very well.

Sister in law told my FWW that she was thinking of having an A. SIL didn't know about my FWW's A. We sat her down and broke our rule about never telling anyone about the A. She was blown away. She is now working her [censored] off trying to fix her M.

My dad had his first W leave him for OM.

My FWW's father was a serial cheater and is now M to the OW who he left my FWW's mother for. He cheats on his current W.

At my office there has been a ton of people hit by A's. Nine women have had their husbands cheat. Women in the office next to mine has a serial cheater for a H. He has cheated at least three times.

Another women has three kids from her first H. He was a serial cheater and now has eleven kids with seven other women.

I could go on and on.......

Yes it is hemi. My marriage is one of the best I know of in my life. Thats good for my marriage but a pretty grim statistic really.

I know loads of people who have affairs.

I was fricken clueless.

I came to the conclusion the weekend that if I was told how my life was going to play out and I could continue to marryM my FWW knowing about the A, but forgeting about it when I made the decision to marry her, would I still marry her.

Yeah I would.

Our M is going better then I ever could of imagined. I really don't think we would of ever gotten to this point without such a life changing event.

I am very happy for you Bob....

hemi

Really you are so right. I was on vacation last 2 weeks and every marriage I saw was either already affected by infidelity, or ripe for it. I could list ten or twelve marriages that are marked by affairs just amongst my friends and neighbours. Its horrible.

Hemit, where do I begin? In 1989 my SIL began an A and ended up leaving her H(who was my cousin). Another cousin's H left her and her 4 children, 3 were teens, and ended up Med to the OW. He was and still is a complete a**hole. Has no relationship with any of his children. My other cousin's M was effected by infidelity by both he and his W. They're now Ded. Kids from their M are very screwed up, especially the oldest. Drugs and jail. Two of my uncles, that I know of, had As. H's younger brother had an A after 2 yrs. of M and Ded W for OW. Now they aren't together either. SIl's H had an A, but they are recovering. Another cousin's W left him I'm pretty sure for an OW. My good friend's H almost left her and her 4 children for an OW. The day he moved out he went to OW's house and found her with an OM. Friend and her H are still together. OK, who am I forgetting? These are just people I know really well. I haven't hit on people I just know of. As Bob would say, "These As are crap." And I say, "As suck!" CV

Yes, it is everywhere but there are a select number of us that choose not to join the "club".

Maybe their like me an naive. I always thought divorce was something that was seen on Jerry Springer or done by rich business men <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" /> It couldn't ever happen to me. It was always someone else. Like Bob, I think I am developing a knack on identifying certain marriages that may be ripe for affairs. It's a sad state. Once you go through one, you can kind of tell who might.

You never relise how much something is there until it happens to you.

Movies glamorize infidelity. Always here stories of celebrities leaving a spouse for another or being caught before they say their vows.

My father had an A soon after he came back from WWII, left my mom with 3 small children. He was gone for 9 years and very rarely dropped by to see them or give them any money. They got back together and had me, all I saw was a wonderful loving relationship.

My sister's first H had several A's. Both my brothers had A's in their marriage. I know of cousins and uncles who have done the same.

See a lot of it living in a military community. I noticed but not like I do now.

Just makes me very sad cuz' now I know how much damage it causes.

I agree we become more cognizant of infidelity because of our own experiences and because of the knowledge that we acquire through MB principles. I think as a society we do a horrible job of preparing people for M. We, myself included, for the most part have no idea how to insure a successful M. It seems to me if the money spent on attorneys in the dissolution of our unions, was instead spent at the front end of a M, our world would be much, much better.
I have a situation here at work, where one of my bosses I suspect is having an A with one of my co-workers. The body language is all there. They have become close in the past 5 months. He makes it known that he would leave his W if it werent for the kids. It is SO disgusting and because of my experience, just hearing and seeing what I do still cuts me right to the bone. I would like to bi#$h slap the both of them. But then I would have to find a new place to earn a living. Ughhhhhh!