Hello all,
first I would like to thank you all. I was really lost. And this site, this forum and you all gave great things to me in such a little time. I feel safe now. Thank you.
In short here's my story. My W came back to my country from the U.S where she was working for 1 year in January. I've discovered her A in april with the OM from U.S (the OM also was a new comer to the U.S.).
As I've found this site last week I was working on plan A since.
Today while checking my old mails, I've discovered that somehow I've already completed the plan A without MB. In the end, before the D-Day she ended the EA. But she was trying to stay friend with him as she needs him for her uncompleted works in the U.S. And NC after the D-day I think. There was no NC letter. I think that she has ended the EA as I was a very lovely husband who was trying to meet her ENs at this time. I got that from her hidden mails (before D-day). She had PA before coming to my country.
Now here's my problem, we don't get any MC and I'm really tired. I don't want to do much about my M right now. And this is the same for mw WW. But I wait from her to do "something", to find her weaknesses, to discover her selfish behaviours, to recover our M. I feel empty, I'm tired and I still think about the A half a day. I think I'm not in love with her. I don't know if I'll fall in love again with her. But I'm very confused. I don't know if the MC is the solution.
What can I do?

Hi John

Plan A and plan B are designed to end the affair. if you are certain all contact has ceased between your W and OM for ever, the affair is over.

Recover starts then.

The changes you made to yourself in plan A should continue - they will seem like a trick otherwise.

Recovery is truly a rollercoaster with feeling sof love, hate , anger and compassion coming and going in tides.

You should attend MV together you and your W or use the phone counselling service of Dr. Harley.

All blessings

Hello Bob,
I'm reading all your posts and they are helping me a lot.
I'm married for 2,5 years now with no kids. My wife had gone to the U.S. for 1 year. I was counting the days for her return. When she came back she began to talk about The OM from her work in the U.S. and she wasn't interested in me. We fought in front of her family because of this and she told us that the OM was a very kind person and a very valuable friend for work (same story everywhere:)) He was helping her a lot about her works so I let her IM with OM without knowing the A. But I was trying to meet her ENs. (Now I understand what I was trying to do). 3 weeks before the D-day I asked her if there was something between her and the OM. She said again "no". So I told her "you can love somebody else" there is no problem with this. But trying to stay with me while loving somebody else this is wrong." she stayed silent. 2 weeks before the D-day I couldn't sleep because of thinking what was going on. She didn't sleep also and didn't tell me anything. I tried to kiss her once and she didn't kiss back and told me that she didn't deserve me as she does wrong things at wrong times. 2 weeks later I've discovered the A. She was very lovely and very kind for 3 weeks before the D-day. On D-day I've discovered her secret e-mails. Her love letters. I have never heard for myself this kind of love words from her. She lied to me, lied to her family. She even IM with the OM in front of my eyes from her laptop where my picture was on the background.
Now my heart broken as all of you and I don't feel anything. I'm empty. This is almost my 4th month after the D-day. I don't know if I want back my WW.