Post deleted by realandtrue

Real,

The real reason she moved out was to make it easier to see the OM. Consider everything coming out of her mouth a lie, until proven otherwise.

Of course she is still in contact with OM. She will tell you everything you want to hear.

Your first priority is to break up the A. Best way to do that is to expose the A to the most influential people in her life. Also if the OM is married, YOU MUST EXPOSE TO HIS WIFE!!

You must start being PRO-active. This will make you feel better..you are doing something about it.

She is totally intoxicated by the A and has become an alien still in your W's body. Why else would she ABANDON HER CHILDREN??? My God, she has it bad.

Read about plan A and lovebusters and her love bank. You either woo her back by plan A, being the best you can be for her, or you go dark and plan B with no contact.

I think you should be in the plan A mode...if you want to save the M. Read all you can on this site.

Welcome to MB, so sorry you have to be here, but it's the best place to be right now.

Take care of yourself, get enough sleep and exercise. Maybe look into anti-deprssnts if you feel like you can't cope (which is mentioned in your thread.)

Late at night and weekends are kind of slow, here in the halls of MB. Monday should pick up.

Stay strong for your kids and you.

k

Welcome to MB. Sorry you are here but you came for support and recovery right? You might not feel like any of it is possible but let's start with small steps.

1st we need to help you get your focus back. Here's some suggestions you can do right now:

1. Read the concepts section above.

2. Focus on what you read and apply it to how it can help you first.

3. Don't try to help, preach or teach anything to a WS. They are not primed for education. They are only primed for selfish and greedy acts.

4. Based on item 3, limit your time with the WS for the time being....while you work on your personal improveiments. When you see your real wife emerge, show her love and consideration. If she morphs into the WS, drop all and run. .... or walk away ASAP. You will get the hang of all this soon.

5. Read Surviving an Affair, His needs/Her needs and Love must be tough. 1st 2 books are by Dr Harley and the 3rd is by Dr James Dobson. READ THEM ALL!!!!

6. Call Jennifer C @ MB for some phone counseling AFTER you have read the above. She will give you some homework (not hard) and a plan. By then you w/b ready to implement them.

7. Identify your personal boundaries.

8. Determine who, when and how much to expose the A.

9. Secure your families finances.

10. If you have children, reassure them of your love. Work on a protection plan for them and don't take anything for granted. WS' have a way of undermining the best of our intentions. Remember you are dealing with an alien ant-family character. Don't let her looks deceive you.

Enough?!?!?!? Ok, now go get started.

L.

U deleted your post. R U ok?

L.