The other day my H & I were watching a Dharma & Greg episode. This episode had me triggered all over the place b/c Dharma had enrolled in college & her professor wrote her a love letter telling her that he was in love w/her. She became emotionally attached to this professor. Although she knew that she didn't want to have an A w/this man, she kept this love letter anyway & hid it from Greg. Well, Greg found the love letter & then of course, there were marital problems. He couldn't trust her anymore b/c she had feelings for another man. They went to a MC & in the middle of the session the MC was talking to her BF & mentioned he was M'd.
Why did I keep on watching this episode if it was full of triggers? B/C I wanted to see how they handled the situation. Dharma was in an EA. Greg was hurt, very hurt. Understandably. Their MC was WHACKED! And Dharma even suggested going to a different MC. She suggested switching colleges. Greg said no. Maybe that was out of concern for her. That he didn't want her to get uprooted, I don't know. But then, after promising to not have contact w/the professor, she got a ride home from him b/c it was raining & the professor didn't want her waiting at the bus stop in the rain. When she got out of the car at her building, Greg was outside walking the dogs. When he saw her, he handed her the umbrella & the dogs & left. Great job on the reactions of the BS, I must say. But the way they handled the situation, I would have done things some things differently (after learning so much from this site, thank you!) & yet the way they treated the situation as far as the hurt in the betrayal from Greg & the reaction to what Dharma had done & the lengths she wanted to go to save her M were dead on, I think.
Of course this episode had both of us triggered, yet we learned from it at the same time. So I'm glad we watched it together. LB could see that I was triggered, I could feel his eyes on me. The episode was over & during the episode I had my choice things to comment on. But afterwards, there was an awkward silence. I could tell it was on both our minds. How did LB handle it?
He looked at me, turned it on mute & screamed at the tv, waving his hands in the air, "NC MEANS NC! WHAT DOESN'T SHE UNDERSTAND?" I just stared at LB in amazement. I thought to myself, This man truly does get it.
Newbies, don't give up hope. There are some people who actually do "get it" after a while.
