First let me thank all of you people out there for being here. I don't know if I could get through this without this web site.

My W and I have been together for thirteen years. We have had a true love romance for the first ten years of our relationship. I have always had problems with her family as they have never liked me. However, I never let them get to me. We never had a fight in those first ten years and were truly in love. About three years ago her mom got under my skin and I flipped out. I was so upset with my wife for not standing up with me and telling her mom she was wrong. This sent me into a downward spiral and made me bring up every past mistake there ever was. This went on for the last three years. Well back in June my W started acting out of the ordinary and not spending anytime with me at all. Also going out by her self a lot. I confronted her about it and she told me she wasn't happy anymore and wants a divorce. I asked if there was someone else and she denied it. On June 14 while I was out of the house she packed the kids up and went to her sisters house for three weeks. I left her alone and when we did talk I kept my cool and avoided LB. I forced her back home with the kids and told her I wanted to work on things and she said there was nothing left. She started going out everynight after the kids went to be and staying out till 2 and 3 am. I confronted her again and she admitted that there was someone else. I didn't loose my cool or anything. I just told her I wanted her to move out. She said she wouldn't go with out the kids. I am not giving up the kids either. She went to file for a D and I later found out that OM has the same lawyer for his D. I am still using plan a during the last two months and avoiding all LB. When we are together in the house. I can get her to hug me and sometimes kiss me but nothing else. We help each other with all things, but she says she doesn't think we will ever be able to work it out. I have made the decision to have the courts make her leave because she refuses to do it own her own, and the kids are really emotional about all this even though I try to keep it from them. She goes to be with OM everyday and phone call on cell are constant. Her family is supporting her move because they don't like me. I don't really know if I have a chance or not. When I talk with her and deal with her I can feel the love she has for me but she says she just don't love me anymore and that she is just being nice. I am just not sure. Any survivors out there please help me out.

I'm not a survivor (yet), but I can share some of my sitch. My M also seemed fine for the first 10-11 years. Then about 2-3 years ago, my W statrted staying out late, etc. I confronted her about if there was someone else, and she denied it. Finally, I found out the truth about 6 weeks ago.

There are other plan A experts out there and I would suggest posting your question on the general questions part since it gets more activity.

Anyway, first off, your WW has not established NC? While she is in contact with OM, don't believe anything she says (good or bad). Its just babble. My WW said similar things, but as she goes through withdrawal and continues NC, she starts to come out of the fog every now and then. The advice I recieved is my mission was to end the A. Don't worry about the M right now, end the A. Avoid LB, investigate, expose to end the A. Don't talk about D, just tell your WW you want to fight for the M. (That is assuming you still want the M). As for moving out of the house, I don't know. My WW left home and it has made things harder. Others can probably offer more advice. Good luck

Thanks for the reply

I know that she loves me very much and she is following the lead of her family mother married 3 times and sister with two kids from different guys. and Aunt married 7 times.

I know she is going through a lot right now and she seems depressed most of the time.