Welcome to the
Marriage Builders® Discussion Forum
This is a community where people come in search of marriage related support, answers, or encouragement. Also, information about the Marriage Builders principles can be found in the books available for sale in the Marriage Builders® Bookstore.
If you would like to join our guidance forum, please read the Announcement Forum for instructions, rules, & guidelines.
The members of this community are peers and not professionals. Professional coaching is available by clicking on the link titled Coaching Center at the top of this page.
We trust that you will find the Marriage Builders® Discussion Forum to be a helpful resource for you. We look forward to your participation.
Once you have reviewed all the FAQ, tech support and announcement information, if you still have problems that are not addressed, please e-mail the administrators at
mbrestored@gmail.com
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jul 2005
Posts: 396
Member
|
OP
Member
Joined: Jul 2005
Posts: 396 |
I'm not going to pretend that I'm a big Dr. Phil fan, but I just read something that makes perfect sense. A lot of people here have asked the question...
"How do I know if it's considered cheating?"
Dr. Phil's answer...
"If you wouldn't do it with your spouse standing there, it's cheating."
Hopeful4future
The character of a person is defined by their actions...not their intentions. Otherwise, the world would be full of Saints.
BS: 40 (Me)
xFWW: 50
Married: 9/97
PA: 3 months
D-Day: 6/30/2005 (she revealed to me)
Divorced: 10/2/2008
Happy that I've moved on
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Sep 2005
Posts: 30
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Sep 2005
Posts: 30 |
Me = BS age 30
WH = age 30
M 11 years 4 children ages 11, 8, 2 & 2
D-Day July 22, 2005
OW 37, divorced with 2 children (her XH left her for OW 5 years ago)
WH moved out on D-Day and moved in with OW. They lived together one month. He came home on August 22, 2005.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 1,246
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 1,246 |
You know what... it is deeper than that. If your spouse would be offended by it or is hurt by it, it is wrong/cheating. Some people would do some things even with their spouse RIGHT THERE. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/frown.gif" alt="" />
9 years now ... and some days you still say grrr!
Hang in there.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jul 2005
Posts: 396
Member
|
|
OP
Member
Joined: Jul 2005
Posts: 396 |
Rookkev,
You know, based on your comment then I have to wonder how many things I've done that could have been considered cheating. I've always tried to remain faithful to my wife, but I'm sure I've done things that would have been hurtful to her. Nothing compared to what she did, but hurtful nonetheless.
Hopeful4future
The character of a person is defined by their actions...not their intentions. Otherwise, the world would be full of Saints.
BS: 40 (Me)
xFWW: 50
Married: 9/97
PA: 3 months
D-Day: 6/30/2005 (she revealed to me)
Divorced: 10/2/2008
Happy that I've moved on
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 1,246
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 1,246 |
That's kinda the point. I know my breakdown is a bit extreme... but ultimately, we all cross boundaries. I'm not trying to minimize the affairs, but, that whole heart state that God looks at is what I try and evaluate on myself. I see and find myself wanting far too often. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/frown.gif" alt="" />
9 years now ... and some days you still say grrr!
Hang in there.
|
|
|
|
1 members (1 invisible),
149
guests, and
49
robots. |
|
Key:
Admin,
Global Mod,
Mod
|
|
|
|
|
|
