Hi, fredswife.

I really like your brother-in-law.

<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

Gimble

Do you think this is going to backfire???

Hi, fredswife.

Oh, and if he ends up living with other woman, his level of desperation and neediness will kill that relationship to the point that she will be buying him a ticket home.

Just make sure that you are in control of you when the doody hits the rotational airfoil device. He is his own worst enemy right now, let him do his thing.

Make sure that you have the cash from the 401k in a separate account he can't access. You are the hero for you and the kids right now. You can't trust him on any level. That will change eventually, but right now, you can't trust him as far as you can throw him. Do you understand? This is very important.

This can be fun to watch, you just have to adjust your attitude.

God bless,
Gimble

Define "backfire".

Do I think he is going to be angry and blame sunspots on you and call you every name in the book? Yep.

He will get over it as the realization of what he has done, and the resulting guilt is manifest. It will take a while though. Time and patience are your best buddies.

Gimble

Your BIL is awesome! He has helped you more than you realize. You owe a debt of gratitude to that man!

Dear Fred's Wife,
Great news. Good luck with the homecoming.

Best wishes,
K.D's Heartbreak

Are you ready for this one....
BIL went home to talk to H.
H was in his pj's crying, that his life is awful and a big huge sob story.
That wife has ruined his life, and now he has nobody.
He is depressed.
BIL tried to show compassion but didn't have the heart to kick him out.
BIL told him that he needs to stop feeling sorry for himself and get out bed and get into a routine.
BIL called me and said he didn't know what to do.
I told BIL to encourage H to go home and tell him that if he was miserable at home that BIL would let him come back.
SO, MIL comes home tells me she talked to H and he wants to come home as planned,in October BUT I told her that he will have to have an open ended ticket and make no plans for returning to CA unless definate job opportunity.
He will be here on the 29th.
BUT WAIT....theres more.
H called to talk to kids, I got the phone.
Told him we needed to talk.
After he yelled for a while, I found out something verrrrry interesting.
OW thinks I am a psycho ******, and is afraid I may try and do something to her and her son.She wants nothing more to do with H because she is worried about her safety.
This is all about my email incident.
I have never threatened her or her family in any way.
So, H is upset because he says he has now lost his friend, and it is all my fault. (boohoo)!!
I said I was sorry things had to come to this, it is very unfortunate.
(I will be checking the next cell phone bill to see if he is lieing or not)!!
So, H is coming home for a visit I do not know how long he plans on staying, he really has no other place to go now.
I had better get my [censored] in gear on all of those darn marriage busters and be the woman I am supposed to be.
I am just hoping this is not all a big lie.
I will eventually find out if it is or not.

Sounds good. Now can you calm down and start taking care of you and your children?

Yes, but this is not the ideal situation.'H still denies that OW is anything more then just a friend.
We went over the emails together, and he had an answer for everything.
DO NOT THINK I AM CRAZY, but what are the chances that OW had more feelings for H then he had for her?
H has only female friends, and is very naive.
Yes he has lied countless times and has been deceptive. When I asked him about this tonight, he said he was scared that I would take his friend away and that because I was always so controlling he felt that I would ruin his friendship with her.

THIS IS A SMALL PART OF HER EMAIL TO A FRIEND


"At that beginning phase of a relationship...they want to spend much time with that male and seem to drift attention away from their girl friends. That seems very consistent with me. I know I am doing this. There is a part of this that goes away quickly in a relationship and I don't want to lose that either".

"I want you to be happy for ME...not consider him. That is what I want. Right now, he makes me very happy. I know the situation is not ideal".

one of the best things that could happen to your marriage from exposure HAS happened!

the OW doesn't want any more to do with your H. Who cares why!

so...he'll come home

given time, maybe he'll be ready to admit everything-once you are meeting his needs and avoiding LB and he can see that coming home was the right choice.

i wish OW in my situation had done the same. instead she threatened to beat ME up and has seemed to dig her claws even deeper into my H because of my attempts to expose which was worthless anyway since her H and my H family all knew way more than i did and ended up telling ME things instead.

what's that called? unexposure? reverse exposure? nope-

[censored] outta luck and most likely outta marriage-ya that's it!

enjoy the success of your hard work and good luck!

I don't know if he is still lieing, only time will tell

He has an openended ticket, he may leave after a week.
Just don't know where he will move to.

i heard the same lie actually.

after my first attempt at exposing to OWH, my H told me OW did not want anything more to do with him because she didn't want me in her life or her children's life.

he was so dramatic! he said that she was "done with him" that he would never have a chance at a relationship with her and i had gotten my way again. he said "you have taken away my free will to choose where and with who i spend my life with."

(oh really you stupid a$$-i thought YOU did that when you chose to marry me!!)

anyway...

i found calls after that date on his cell phone to OW cell phone and then-i drove to his house at 2:00 am and her van was in the driveway and her son was sleeping in my H bed!!!

when i contacted OWH like i said i would if they were ever in contact again...he said OW had been living with muy H since April and he told me all that crap in July

just lovely the lies they tell us and get angry when we question them or discover the truth

and then they get angry at us for telling anyone (including them) the truth

maybe this is just a disease.....they are allergic to the truth!!

The more I think about things the more I am starting to wonder what is true anymore.
He is so damn convincing, he really used to be an honest person.
I sound so cynical because he has told so many damn lies.
Like I said time will tell, when the cell phone bill comes in, the truth will be revealed.
The new billing cycle conveniently starts today.
This supposedly happened yesterday.
The good thing is he is coming home, and alot can happen in the next 3 weeks.
I have to stay calm, and get my $hit together!!

And when are you going to start taking care of YOU? Time to start. My WH used to be honest too. That is why I took so long to figure out that he was cheating.

Please, please, give yourself a break, and some rest.

I know but I think I just got duped again.
Something just doesn't sound right anymore.
I need to go and pray, and get some sleep!

Hi, fredswife.

Quote:
==============
I know but I think I just got duped again.
==============

Well, I think brother-in-law got duped for sure. Has your hubby ever considered an acting career?

Hubby cried and got to stay. How convenient.

Gimble

Did you see previous post?
H will be coming home on September 29th.
OW wants nothing more to do with him because I am a psycho ****** and she is afraid for her safety and that of her son.
That is why he was crying when BIL came home.
He is angry with me because he says she was the only true friend he had and now I have destroyed their relationship.

BOO-HOO

he can't move in with OW now, and MIL is going home, so he has no where else to go.
He is soooooo angry with me.
I am renting out MIL apartment for extra income, so he will not be able to stay there.
I guess he can have the couch.