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#1469404 09/08/05 04:16 PM
Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 11,539
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Hey!!! Missed you, how are you?


Faith

me: FWW/BS 52 H: FWH/BS 49
DS 30
DD 21
DS 15
OCDS 8
Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 11,539
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BTW Appy you are not "taking up space" in MB. You give very wise, thoughtful counsel my friend.


Faith

me: FWW/BS 52 H: FWH/BS 49
DS 30
DD 21
DS 15
OCDS 8
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985
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Aphelion, I also have missed your wisdom very much. Wish you would come back, my friend!


"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt

Exposure 101


MelodyLane #1469407 09/08/05 05:22 PM
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ummmm

I think his FWW may have dropped the "F" .... at least that is the impression I got...

MelodyLane #1469408 09/08/05 05:24 PM
Joined: May 2004
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Oops, almost missed this. Sorry.

Thanx for the good wishes. This is a good place filled with good people. The absolute best advice I have received in the past year has been from the good people, including some FWWs, here on MB.

I'm doing a drive-by after hearing about 2long’s situation elsewhere.

MB is a fairly specific approach to combating, and recovery from, adultery. It is very successful when applied to garden variety affairs.

But 20 months past D-Day 2 (or 3, or is it 4) and now barely a month after another series of really bad revelations, I see a very different kind of problem in my situation.

My predicament has more to do with long term addiction and addictive behaviors. Very addictive behaviors. An addiction considered by some experts to be more difficult to overcome than alcohol and drugs. Per Dr Harley, pure MB does not work in these cases. Missing ENs are neither rational nor meetable. (Is meetable a word?)

So, maybe I don’t belong here.

This has been a very difficult month for me. I am reevaluating everything, again. When I caught myself acting out on here while in the midst of these new revelations I decided I needed a cooling off period. Maybe I just needed to go into my cave for awhile. Not yet sure when I will be presentable again.

Again, thank you very much, from my heart of hearts, for your thoughts and prayers. W, DS and I sure need them

With prayers,


Added: Pep, hard to say. The jury is still out. NC has been broken from W end. Definitly a lower case f is in order.

Last edited by Aphelion; 09/08/05 05:27 PM.

"Never forget that your pain means nothing to a WS." ~Mulan

"An ethical man knows it is wrong to cheat on his wife. A moral man will not actually do it." ~ Ducky

WS: They are who they are.

When an eel lunges out
And it bites off your snout
Thats a moray ~DS
Aphelion #1469409 09/08/05 05:30 PM
Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 2,204
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{{{{{{{aphelion}}}}}}}}}}


Dorry (aka Deeplysorry)
me FWW - EA/PA fall of 2004
FWH EA/PA late spring 2005
Got our acts together July 2005 and started recovery.

The Recovery Guide for WW's (Wayward Wives)
Dorry's Story

[color:"blue"]Excuses are easy...change is hard....[/color]
Aphelion #1469410 09/08/05 06:25 PM
Joined: Aug 1999
Posts: 15,284
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AP,

I do believe you are right about some issues not being addressable within the context of MB approach. As you mentioned addictions surely is one, abuse, childhood issues,etc are not about unmet needs and don't respond to meeting needs.

On the other hand, what this site still offers is insight into the thinking of people that don't seem very logical to most of us WS OR BS. LTAs are surely in this class because they have taken on a life of their own, they have their own rules, history, and language. You and 2Long have a much different battle, especially since your WW's are not willing to help.

I do hope you post here, and I do hope you continue to offer good advice. I would hope to hear your story on this site as well. The reason...? Because it will help other people see the limits of any given approach as well as see the similarities in how people rewrite their lives while in an affair.

I have forgotten the posters name. He was here when I first started reading here in Feb. 1999. He had just found his W had a 5 year affair with her boss while he was treated like dirt and was essentially abandoned to raise the kids.

His anger on this site was legendary for quite awhile, he decided to move the family to a different state and to his surprise his W move with them. I don't know that he ever over came his anger and I don't know that their marriage survived.

My point is that seeing/hearing about this situations provides posters here with new insight. And sometimes someone like yourself can glean some useful information even if the whole approach is not geared for the situation you find yourself in.

Please continue to post and I wish you well in which ever path you choose to take.

God Bless,

JL


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