H returned from CA last Thursday. We had a brief conversation on Friday (I called him) about him taking care of my cats that weekend. It did not go too well. It was the first conversation since his email where he said "I want friendship only, and the freedom to live seperate lives". I did not know how to talk to him and I don't think he did either.
My response to H's email (2 weeks ago) after all the trouble we had in the last 3 months was, that I agreed to have seperate lives. Yes, I do want him back, but he has hurt me so much since leaving in May that I just at that moment could not think of anything else but moving on. I may have messed up but anything I did to show I cared I felt taking advantage off (he was soooo cake eating!!! - and I was letting him <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/frown.gif" alt="" />) and basically he kept seeing me as pushing him to get back together. In the email he also told me he was not thinking of us getting back together and did not want to do MC anymore....
Anyway, I have been doing well. I am moving on. I have been crying a lot but not as much and the pain is a bit less. It is still hard to tell people that I am separated and that my H left me. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/frown.gif" alt="" />
But now, after we talked on Friday H send me an email that same day to tell wish me a nice trip and not to worry about the cats.
Then on Monday after I got back he called. He told me the cats look good, and kept asking me about my trip. I went camping with some people I just met. I am telling him about it all and then he asks me "so you were out there camping for 2 days, you slept out there?"
I don't know what he was getting at. The thing is that I just met these people and H has always seen me and critisized me for being antisocial. I think he is kind of shocked that I went camping for 3 days with people I just met 3 weeks ago. I did it to get out of town, and they are nice people.
Then he calls me on Wednesday "I am just calling to say hello". So we talk for 10-15 minutes. He is asking me what I am up to, etc...
Now he calls me today, asking for his credit card number. He wants to cancle it but he already threw out the credit card so doesn't have the number. I give it to him. I was tired (just came back from a 6 hour hike). I told him I was tired because of the hike. He asked where I was, etc. We cover it. He is calling from work so I know he has to go soon. Now he is like "so have you been up to anything interesting lately...".
I don't know what to make of all this.
Is he trying to "cake eat" again? He did in the last 3 months. I don't want to go through that again...
OR
Is this his way of being just friends? I am worried I may yet again have hope but he is just being friendly, since he still wants a "friendship".
SHould I not be reading into this....
I have been feeling good about moving on and now I feel like I may get confused...
I don't know if I should stop talking to him...
When he calls, should I not ask him any questions about his day?
I did ask him about a BBQ he went to yesterday (he told me about it yesterday morning).
I have not called him since last friday...
Any thoughts on this would be helpful. Thank you...
Daisy
