|
Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 365
Member
|
Member
Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 365 |
Today is my second anniversary, and my H still wants a divorce. I have felt truly miserable all day. I want my H more than anything. I want to take him and show the kind of W I know I can be. I just wish he would give me that chance. I have more to say about this, but being an elementary school teacher, I only have about 15 minutes during my lunch, so that doesn't leave me much time to type. I could certainly use some encouragement right about now though, either on the MB or at my work e-mail ... siatkaa@ocps.net
Me, the WS, 25 My H, the BS, 25 Married Sept 2003 Served with D papers Aug 2005, but still hoping to make it work
History, despite its wrenching pain, cannot be unlived, but if faced with courage, need not be lived again. --Maya Angelou
Proud of the woman that I have become, not the events that made me become that woman.
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 11,539
Member
|
Member
Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 11,539 |
cinny, I am sorry I am not too familiar with your sitch but wanted to send MB hugs your way. {{{cinny}}}
Faith
me: FWW/BS 52 H: FWH/BS 49 DS 30 DD 21 DS 15 OCDS 8
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jun 2005
Posts: 474
Member
|
Member
Joined: Jun 2005
Posts: 474 |
{{{{cinny}}}} Hugs to you today. I am sorry you are feeling so sad.
Take care of yourself!
Zorro94
|
|
|
|
Joined: Mar 2004
Posts: 530
Member
|
Member
Joined: Mar 2004
Posts: 530 |
Sorry...mine is coming up next month, 6 years but I'm going to try and do something I truely enjoy that day! I suggest you ask the Lord to calm your storm and learn and grow. Hang in there. Later.
|
|
|
|
Joined: Sep 2005
Posts: 2,197
Member
|
Member
Joined: Sep 2005
Posts: 2,197 |
Tomorrow is my anniversery and I don't know whether to acknowledge it or not (he is still pretty foggy and fence sitting).
Big hug to you, I know how bad this hurts.
Me-41 BS (FWS) DH-41 WS (FBS) 2DD's- 10 and 12 Married 15 years Separated for 2 years after my A Reconciled for 1 year before his A D-day for his A 8/23/05 WH moved out 9/16/05 Divorce final 1/23/07 Affair ended or month or so later My Story
|
|
|
|
Joined: May 2004
Posts: 1,892
Member
|
Member
Joined: May 2004
Posts: 1,892 |
cinny,
The most painful days for members on this board are often anniversaries. Spending your time alone on a day that should be a one of celebration and joy is certainly emotionally devastating.
I would think much more so for a truly repentant WS. The ackowledgement that you are responsible for that destruction of an M and a family must be beyond comprehension.
Time and the Lord heal all wounds
Divorced: "Never shelter anyone from the realities of their decisions": Noodle
You believe easily what you hope for ernestly
Infidelity does not kill marriages, the lying does
|
|
|
|
Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 365
Member
|
Member
Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 365 |
Cym...
Thanks for reminding people of the fact that I am a WS and not the BS. While, yes, it does hurt knowing that my actions brought me to this place, I often feel like it is not my place to feel distraught over where I am.
I did get to see my H last night/this morning, but it was not in a way that I would have liked. I have read a lot about H wanted SF from their W, and nothing else. That seems to be where my H is right now. I am trying to set up boundaries for my own emotional well-being, but it is hard. From everything that I have learned about EN and the love bank, I want to take every opportunity to make deposits into his love bank by meeting his needs. That seems to be the only need that he gives me the opportunity to meet. But it is has gotten to the point where it is starting to affect my self-esteem.
I am afraid that if I stop giving him SF, that I will drive him further away, but I am also afraid that if I do give him SF that I will feel completely worthless.
This may have been a bit of a disjointed post, but it is the end of the day and, although my students are supposed to be silent reading at their desk, I am constantly having to stop what I am doing to help them re-focus. Gotta love fourth graders!
Me, the WS, 25 My H, the BS, 25 Married Sept 2003 Served with D papers Aug 2005, but still hoping to make it work
History, despite its wrenching pain, cannot be unlived, but if faced with courage, need not be lived again. --Maya Angelou
Proud of the woman that I have become, not the events that made me become that woman.
|
|
|
0 members (),
551
guests, and
86
robots. |
Key:
Admin,
Global Mod,
Mod
|
|
Forums67
Topics133,625
Posts2,323,524
Members72,031
|
Most Online6,102 Jul 3rd, 2025
|
|
|
|