This is my first time to post~I have been separated now for 3 months from my H. I left the home along with my 1 year old and moved to my Mom's house. I did not tell him I was leaving and did not discuss the issues with him, he had been drinking, is very controlling, gambling (without my knowledge...diff. checking account), going to friend's houses to play cards, smoking, some drugs...and I could not deal with it anymore, he basically had turned me into a homebody that didn't talk to many of my friends anymore and basically I did what he said and I had had enough. He has been very upset and not understanding at all, I filed for divorce and we have had a temp. custody meeting, he now has to have supervised visitation every other fri. at 6 until sat. at 6, which he thinks is pretty much all my fault anyway. I know see that he completely controlled me and I am just now realizing that he has wounded me emotionally (for example, telling me he would break things in the house if I hung up on him). I don't feel like he is ever going to change and really don't see us getting back together, he will not sign divorce papers until I agree to go to 3 counseling sessions with him (once again all his terms) so we went for the first time last night and he really has no idea as to how he treated me...remember he is always right.. [color:"blue"] [/color]

Hi [color:"blue"]Lost [/color] ,
The Marriage Builders website is a great resource for information. Read up on everything you can (not here on the discussion forums, but on the site itself). Once you're familiar with the MB philosophy, you might want to start posting in the General Questions or Plan A & B forums. There is lots of traffic there and plenty of people to respond (weekends are usually slow on all forums.) The Divorced section should be your last resort.