A couple of friends of mine are going through the whole infidelity thing. The problem that he is having (he is the BS) is that his WW text messages a LOT from her phone. Some of the numbers he knows....some not. Of course, there is no reverse phone lookup for cell phones. And to have one tracked costs about $100 each, apparently.

Does anyone know if there's a way to get a copy of the actual 'text' that is sent in the messages?

I told him I'm not even sure that's legal??? But it is their account, so I don't know.....

Thanks for any help!

No, there is no way I have already tried that!!

They say that some new phones will save the text message, but I don't know about that. You can check cell numbers at Intelius. It cost about 15 dollars to look up a number. It's how I found out who the OM was.

I tried to find my wife's text messages but was unable. If you are willing to pay the money and destroy your phone, I've heard there "might" be a way to view a few messages. From the conversations I've had, I doubt it though.

sounds like my WW. A started with text messages to OM as an EA then progressed to PA. 500 texts May, 1000 texts June, 1500 till D-Day on 7-16. Moved in with OM 7-29. The convienences we give them (ie cell phones) turned against us.

I agree, no way. I was told it would be equivalent to trying to get a copy of a voice telephone conversation. They just don't save the data. They are merely a conduit for the data.

However, it does depend on the company whether you can somehow get a copy. I have seen a recent thread that discussed a certain company that allowed you to set up the account to copy text messages to an email address. I think they said Nextell. The thread was just last week so it shouldn't be hard to find.

IMHO, you would not get as good information as you can by just getting a voice activated digital voice recorder. Phone conversations give up much more detailed information than snooping on stupid text messages.

Look around the boards/past threads for more information.

ACT OUT

Text messaging is how I initially found out about my STBXWW's A. It is a disgusting and familiar pattern. If, and when, I ever get into another relationship, I cant see myself ever being comfortable again with either of our phones having this service. But maybe thats just me. It seems like the new way to cheat in this day and time.

My WH's cell phone saves a certain number of text messages. Can you look at the phone?

If your name is on the billing statement

call the provider

cancel the text messaging service

I send text messages via my computer on sprintpcs.com I am faster on a computer keyboard than a phone. If they use a computer to send a text message and you have one of those logging programs on their computer then you could get copies of the logs. Someone told me that WS was communicating with me via text messaging so OW would not know that we had been communicating. LOL!! Now if that's true that would make me the OW since she is now paying his bills, LOL!! I love it!! Maybe I should have an affair with WS...sorry...couldn't resist.

I know some phones do keep folders...if they don't delete immediately you would have to have access to the actual phone to read the sent/received messages.

If there are questionable numbers texting her, and she is having an *A* she'll slip up in some other way......tell your friend to look at the numbers that repeat the most often, that's probably the OM. I mean other's from friends, etc, are probably not going to be as often as texts to/from OM.

I personally hacked both WH's and OW's cell phone's (at the time).....he's got his cell reactivated all of the sudden now, with a different phone number now, but I'll get his info from that one too, it's a waiting game, I'm so much more patient than I used to be and I know I'm MUCH smarter than *prince charming*.

It amazes me that the standard WS assumption is that their BS's are morons, they leave such huge freaking clues....apparently they think the entire world is oblivious to their moral vacation.

We have GOT to make some kind of book for BS's about all the clever little ways we found our info......but it can't be a book.....WS's could get ahold of a book......maybe it'll just have to be a thread... <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

-Caren

Thank God the W/Ss' follow the same script and are mostly, so obvious. Right now w/h is under the glare of the spot light. I shined the light on his text-messages he had sent to the o/w the day after discovery and the promise to not contact. Boy is he nervous. I haven't said anything, and I won't until he gets back from out of town tommorrow night.

Thanks all of you for your help. Oh, and btw....it's not my spouse that's doing it <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" /> My exH and I are (obviously) not together any more.

My thoughts on this matter are that she is using the texting to keep up the emotional part of the affair. Or to schedule meeting places, etc. Who knows. I will tell him about intellius? and see if he can find out who the cell phone belongs to.

But I think he really wants to catch her red handed with her texts in order to prove that it is inappropriate. She, of course, has pulled the "we can just be friends" bit. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" />

I'm hoping she will flub up somewhere else....but without knowing about the texts, I understand his apprehension.

Thanks again!