Ya know...most days I do ok. I am pretty detached and life without h in the house is much more pleasant then it was with him here. If you follow my story at all you know we are still married, no legal anything, and I am waiting for the military talk with him. Kids have started counseling and are having a very hard time dealing with the situation. I was very honest with them about the sitch explaining in language and terms they can understand.

I watch as the man I love(ed) is literally losing everything and getting further into the gutter over this woman. I don't want the alien wh, but I will tell you two things I thought of today that really really hurt me and nothing has really hurt me in a while.... One was that ow and h are hanging out at h's best friend's house and I guess this friend and his wife have been hanging with h and ow. This hurts because I THOUGHT they were my friends too. They know h and I are still very married and they had told me at one point they wanted to hear nothing of this relationship because they didn't approve of it. And now all four of them are hanging out! THAT really hurts. But I try to be objective and say that they don't want to be in the middle of anything and don't want to lose h as a friend so they just go along with it and "mind their business" so to speak. I mean around here it is so common for people to split up and be with someone else even if they are still married. They are all stupid and figure it is ok since he doesn't live here anymore.

the other thing that really hurt today was that I wonder if he tells her he loves her and if he tells her he loves her when they have sf... that was always something so special to me, having him tell me he loved me when we were intimate. what if he is sharing that with her now? she told her stbxh that my h had told her he loved her, but she could be lying or my h could just be saying it because he uses the term loosely I think because I do not believe he knows what it is. but it still hurts just the same.

why does this bother me? when will those feelings go away? I would love to just talk to h's best friend and say how can you all hang out when you know we are still married? how can that be ok? but maybe they weren't my friends at all, just his. it still hurts. mlhb

bump

I think it's hard. I can't take back the so-called friends that supported the A. FWH has discontinued all contact with those "friends" who supported the A, of his own volition, or I probably would have tried for him. I realize now it is better this way. They weren't friends of the Marriage.

Here's hoping your WH wakes up and finds his way home.

I assume you're in PLAN B? Good Luck.