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Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 11,539
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Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 11,539 |
WS: You are trying to control me again. This is my house too you know. Don't touch my things. You have no right to touch my things. They are my things.
BS: Oh stop lying Ws. I am NOT trying to control you, I am trying to 'keep control' over our family so we don't end up with your stupid disease and start babbling and lying like you. BTW, control is not always a bad thing. Only when one uses it to enable his/her A. Now stop lying and being selfish. You know when you tell me NOT to touch your things and other such nonsense babble, it just makes me WANT to touch your things. LOL!!! Now, do your things have cooties on them or some other loathsome virus?!?!?!? Orchid, that is hilarious! In fact it is almost word for word what I have heard out of WH's mouth! My they do follow scripts don't they?
Faith
me: FWW/BS 52 H: FWH/BS 49
DS 30
DD 21
DS 15
OCDS 8
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Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 11,539
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Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 11,539 |
Ok, I am trying to figure out this feeling I get. I admit to being very immature when it comes to expressing my emotions. I have this internal pain that has settled in my chest. It is familiar, I have had it several times but before all I could say to express how it feels is "I don't want to live anymore". That really is not true, I think it is more like "I don't want to live like this any more". I am not even completely sure what that means to me. I had a brief conversation with my H this morning on the phone. The way he came across left me feeling like he was waiting for the other shoe to drop..you know like I was going to rant and rave. It shook me up for some reason. I was very calm, told him what I needed to discuss with him and told him I felt that he was expecting something else from me. Then this feeling came.
I can't quite put my finger on it. Not sure if my radar went up and the contact between he and OW has increased (an up time in the A?) or if I am feeling bad about my past behavior toward him. I am trying to self soothe but not making very good progress.
Faith
me: FWW/BS 52 H: FWH/BS 49
DS 30
DD 21
DS 15
OCDS 8
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Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 11,539
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Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 11,539 |
Wow! Well this was huge compared to our usual communication. He called back and I calmly told him I was uncomfortable with how our last conversation went. He said he was sorry that since I didn't launch into my "business like" mode with him but started with a "how are you" I had him off balance. He then told me I love it if you called just to chat but could you let me know so I am not anticipating more. Pretty good for him to be expressing himself and for me to calmly tell him what bothered me. So instead of me launching into my assumptions about this being about the A or OW I left it for him to express himself. Took those quarters outta my pocket before we spoke so I would not be that reactionary pinball machine. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" /> I am doing this one day at a time. Reading my books, reflecting, praying and asking God to help me release all this to Him. I am (I think)in the process of letting go. Maybe that is where the anxiety is coming from. In the process of letting go of control I feel a bit uneasy and out of sorts. hmmm..talking to myself can be very theraputic. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />
Faith
me: FWW/BS 52 H: FWH/BS 49
DS 30
DD 21
DS 15
OCDS 8
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Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 17,837
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Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 17,837 |
... He said he was sorry that since I didn't launch into my "business like" mode with him but started with a "how are you" I had him off balance. ..... Very telling isn't it? Kinda weird how the WS mind or the lack thereof processes things. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/eek.gif" alt="" /> Now you know what t/d right? It is a good thing to keep a WS 'off balance' and it wasn't that hard, now was it? <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" /> L.
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Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 11,539
Member
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Member
Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 11,539 |
It is a good thing to keep a WS 'off balance' and it wasn't that hard, now was it? I was easy, Orchid and it felt good. For a moment there I was talking to my H not my WH.
Faith
me: FWW/BS 52 H: FWH/BS 49
DS 30
DD 21
DS 15
OCDS 8
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Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 17,837
Member
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Member
Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 17,837 |
It is a good thing to keep a WS 'off balance' and it wasn't that hard, now was it? I was easy, Orchid and it felt good. For a moment there I was talking to my H not my WH. GOOD!!!! That's a goal. Keep your eyes and ears on the alert for H sightings. As for the WS, plan B him to the max! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" /> L.
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