I'm a Mother of 3, I work, am taking a full load at College and I'm separated from my husband.

It seems as if the harder I try, the harder my kids push their limits. My husband isn't here to give me support. We needed some time apart to break bad habits we had both become way to accustomed to, and this was disolving our love for eachother. This was agreed upon and was a combination of Plans A and B with no affair involved on either of our parts. It's working and we will stick with the original plan until December so that we know it has been long enough to totally break the distructive cycle we were in. Even though this has been good for us, in both our opinions, I miss the support he provides by just being here.

I don't want to shove more than his share of the responsibilites onto him. I'm just feeling overwhelmed with the balancing act. I don't need to work, but I feel a responsibility to my employer to show up as much as I can, and in doing so, I'm not spending as much time as I need to on my studies or with my children. Both are much more important than this job. I will have to go over my schedule this weekend, making a list of the time I need and want to spend with my kids and the time my courses require for studying. Then I have to decide how much time I can afford to spend working, and let my boss know my situation.

I write this post looking for people who can relate to my situation and possibly have tips for surviving without pulling all my hair out!

Thanks to anyone who takes the time to read this.

GIMA

WOW!!!! I see that you are planning on getting back together in December. What will have changed? What are you working on? What is he working on? What is y'alls plan to get back together?


Uhhhh Yeah.... Your hubby is out of the house and the kids lives are disrupted. You're so busy that you don't know if you are coming, going, staying, laying, or praying. And they are crying out for normalcy and attention. If they don't get through healthy means they will get it through other means.


Care to expand on that? And again, what are y'all doing to work on yourselves?


This is where my main concern comes in. You miss him and I'm sure he misses you. So again, what are y'all doing to ensure that when you get back together that things are going to be better. Being seperated and missing each other, things are going to seem grand because the cycles stop. When y'all get back together, things are going to be grand for a while as y'all go through another honeymoon phase. I predict there will be some simmering issues with the children due to the disruption in instability that y'all have chosen for their lives. But when that wears off where are y'all at. Are you guys in therapy? Are you working through a program with some books? With your busy schedule, when is there time to work on you?

If I were you, I'd look to simplify my life. If you don't need to work then don't. Take that time to spend with your kids or work on yourself. If you typically worked while they were in school, then dedicate that time to your studies so that when they are home that they can get 100% of you.